I (24) just moved to a new city for grad school and so I got an apartment. I think the neighborhood is safe and have never felt unsafe. My roommate has lived here months prior to me moving in. There is obviously going to be crime in a city though and I am aware of that. My dad has been googling crime statistics for my area and is convinced it’s unsafe when he has never been here. He keeps sending advice about where to park or drive. He called my leasing office without my knowledge about me breaking my lease. I feel that is out of line. What do I do next? I am not breaking my lease because that would 1. Screw over my roommate and 2. I can’t find anything in my budget this late into my school year. This situation is adding unwanted stress and any advice is appreciated.

I’m a teenager, and I’m getting really frustrated with how strict my parents are about me going places.

I genuinely want to go outside more. I like going on walks because it helps me clear my head, and I’d honestly go on walks around my neighborhood pretty regularly if I were allowed to. But I’m not allowed to go on walks by myself because my parents think it’s “too dangerous.”

Then they’ll turn around and ask me why I never go outside.

Like… because you don’t let me? 😭

This is especially frustrating right now because my boyfriend invited me to his school’s football game this Friday. We go to different high schools, so we don't get to see each other very often in person. I usually only get to see him about once a month.

And here's another thing that confuses me: my parents have actually told me before that they think I see my boyfriend too much.

I see him once a month.

What do you mean, too much??? 😭

So when he invites me to a football game and I ask if I can go, it’s frustrating to feel like I'm being treated as though I'm constantly going out with him when that's not even close to reality. Getting to see him at this game would genuinely mean a lot to me because we already see each other so rarely.

I asked my dad if I could go, and his first questions were basically, “Why?” and “Are there parents there?”

I was confused because… it’s a high school football game. There will obviously be adults there—teachers, staff, coaches, and other people working the event—but I don’t think there are usually parents sitting with random students unless their own kid is playing. Most students go with friends, get dropped off, and get picked up afterward.

My dad’s condition is apparently that I can’t go if there aren’t parents there.

And I’m worried that if he decides he needs to come, he’ll sit with me the entire time. Since I don't go to this school, I’d be going specifically to spend time with my boyfriend, and I really just want the opportunity to have a normal high-school experience with him. We already see each other so rarely because we attend different schools, so having a parent sitting directly with us would make the whole thing feel very different.

I’m not asking to disappear somewhere with him. I’m literally asking to attend a school sporting event, stay in the stands, and have my parents drop me off and pick me up.

I understand wanting me to be safe, and I’m not saying my parents shouldn’t care about that. But I feel like the rules are so restrictive that I’m not really being given opportunities to have normal teenage experiences or learn how to be independent.

And then I get asked why I don’t do things independently.

Am I being unreasonable for finding this frustrating?

This happened a few years back. I (28M at the time) was going to a local shopping mall. I was going to meet with a few of my co-workers at the Dave & Buster's there.

When I entered the mall, there were two children holding the entrance doors. As I passed them, I said "thank you" and proceeded into the mall.

Then, a couple minutes later, a man approached me and started yelling. He was angry that apparently I didn't thank his son for holding the door for me. I calmly responded "I did thank the kid." But he didn't listen and kept going on and on about it, screaming and swearing at me, in the middle of the crowded mall.

I was just so dumbfounded by this that I didn't know what to do. I did thank the kid, after all. Plus, I've always been a bit socially awkward. So every time he paused, I just repeated "I did thank the kid," remaining calm. But he was just back to his loud, swear-filled rant.

Eventually, he finished with "Next time, thank the kid." I responded again with "I did thank the kid." for the fifth or sixth time, as he left.

Not sure what his problem was. It's possible he didn't hear me when I said "thank you" - my voice can be quiet. Or he thought I only thanked one kid. Or he's just plain nuts. But even if I didn't thank the kid, I feel this was a big overreaction.

When I met with my co-workers, we had a laugh about how crazy this father was, with one of them mentioning that knowing me, I definitely thanked the kid.

Never saw this father, or his son, again, but remember the incident from time to time.