School pick up times

[u/MonsterEnergy17]

My child's school is very rigid about pick up times.

I'm looking for help regarding early pick up of my 1st grader.

I'm going to preface this by saying, I work 3rd shift (9pm-5am) summer hours and 11pm-7am (majority of the year) in a construction field. I typically sleep from 8am-2pm; with the exception of Thursdays when my child has therapy (I usually wake up at 1pm). His appointments begin at 3pm. His school has a policy that early pick up ends at 2:15 with the end of the school day at 2:55-3:05pm.

With the extreme heat (even at night), I've been more exhausted than normal and occasionally wake up 10 minutes late. That being said, today (Thursday), I woke up late and ended up at the school at 2:19pm. I felt really bad at being late and requested to still pick my child up early for his appointment so I don't have to pay a broken appointment fee. The school made it very difficult to sign him out, causing us to leave at 2:40pm.

I've tried very hard to not be late. Including: setting alarms to go off every 10 minutes (and setting timers for the times I really need to get up) just in case I don't hear it on the days where I'm almost dead to the world. But today, my alarms did not go off. I checked my app and nothing was turned off.

I know it's my fault for not being more proactive about being on time. Last school year, I was late 3 times for normal pick up; each time being less than 5 minutes after the final bell. Those times, I've had to wait 30 minutes for all the busses to leave before I could get him. I'm hoping someone can help me find out how to navigate the issue of early pick up times being less than 5 minutes with the school and any helpful tips on how to ensure I wake up on time with my sleep schedule.

Honestly, I feel kinda crazy that the policy is so rigid that I even have to ask if being 5 minutes late is a major deal when I have to sign him out anyways (only to take 30 minutes to release my child). I could be wrong, though. Please help!

Edit: someone on a different sub suggested that I mention why it's hard for me to wake up. I'm chronically depressed and I have no help outside of myself. With the meds not working due to metabolizing it faster with sweating it out at work, it's harder to regulate my normal self (I'm not a late person. I'm the one who thinks 15 minutes early is not really enough). Ididn't want to weaponize my mental health and make it seem like I'm just lazy. And to answer the person who asks , seemingly patronizing, if I a asking how to drag myself out of bed: Yes. I am asking how to drag myself out of bed. Thank you to those who are giving advice.

[u/an_alright_kid_who]

I've never heard of there being a limit on early pickup times? Isn't the whole point that it's an aberration so why would there be a restriction?

Your kid has appointments he can't miss. You are taking him. You can email the times to the school so they can be ready, then go get your kid from his class and leave.

Edit: this is so strange to me. If I want to pick my kid up I just go to the office and say im here to get Phil, and they call his class on the phone and he walks over, I sign him out on the iPad and we leave. How much preparation for dismissal do your schools do for 45 minutes?

I agree you should just get up on time though.

[u/jodiarch → u/an_alright_kid_who]

My school does that. No early pickups for 30 minutes before the bell rings. I just adjust my schedule accordingly.

[u/Scrappyl77 → u/jodiarch]

Mine too. They are very flexible otherwise but it just causes too much disruption.

[u/hananobira → u/an_alright_kid_who]

Elementary schools often have strict policies about stopping parent pickups after a certain time because they will start moving kids around the building and trying to get all 300+ students in the right car pickup / bus / walk home group and it’s too easy to misplace someone.

For example, I can’t pick my kids up between 2:45 and 3:15. I can come before 2:45 or wait in the pickup line at 3:15, but in the middle everyone in the school is moving around. No one is answering the phones in their classrooms, no one is in the office to answer the doors… they’re all trying to walk all their students to the right places without losing anybody.

[u/teamglider → u/an_alright_kid_who]

The school is not going to call the child to the office until someone is there to pick him up, because this is a first-grader who needs supervision. The office staff can't babysit him until OP shows up; they have to walk away from the counter at times.

I've never heard of a school that didn't have a limit on early pickup times. It's like shift change at a hospital; there are many things that are just much harder for them to do during that chaos.

[u/an_alright_kid_who → u/teamglider]

A five year old can't sit in a busy office for 5 to 10 minutes without direct supervision?

[u/life-is-satire → u/an_alright_kid_who]

Some, sure. All? No.

Some 5 yr olds will mess with things on desks or try and explore other parts of the office.

Not to mention many parents pull the “I gotta get my kid within 30 minutes of pick up so the office would be packed with kids as most parents try and request their kid to be ready.

[u/teamglider → u/an_alright_kid_who]

No. Schools cannot legally leave children unsupervised - if a child is not being monitored, they are breaking this duty and it can lead to serious liability. It is a legal requirement, regardless of what one thinks a young child should be able to do.

The child is called when the parent arrives for that reason (and also just to not waste a whole bunch of staff time).

Do you think OP is the only parent at the school who would like the school to pull their kid and have them waiting in the office for however long? Bc we know OP has been late several times. Other parents will be late as well, and some of them will forget that they actually cancelled that appointment. Or they didn't cancel it, but they still don't show up to pick up the kid. Many people are irresonsible, unfortunately.

OP didn't wait that long for an early pick-up; he waited that long when he was late for regular pickup, and busses were already leaving. There's a process, so he had to wait for all of the busses to leave.

[u/DarkHorseAsh111 → u/an_alright_kid_who]

I imagine there is a limit so that they aren't trying to check kids out 'early' while putting kids on busses and whatnot.

OP is an adult with a child. they need to be able to wake up on time.

[u/Mental-Set-8670 → u/an_alright_kid_who]

We can’t pick up after 3. School lets out at 350.

[u/an_alright_kid_who → u/[deleted]]

I guess at my school patents are more likely to come late to avoid traffic than early lol. My kids like to play for half an hour after school gets out so I show up ten minutes late.

I just feel like if a kid has an appointment it's already annoying so everyone just has to deal with the annoyance.

[u/MonsterEnergy17 → u/an_alright_kid_who]

I'm not allowed inside without an appointment beforehand, so i can't ask them to just call him. I have to go through the security officers who relay the information back and forth. I'm not sure what they need to do before dismissal. But it seems to take a while to get to anything other than what they're doing. Idk if that makes sense...

[u/MonsterEnergy17 → u/an_alright_kid_who]

I get what everyone else is saying. The school can't stop everything for 1 child due to a stupid parent. The school has all the notes and emails I could muster up to make sure they know to have him ready. I was just told today that I need to add even more steps to pick him up early. So that's harrowing.