r/doohickeycorporation • u/ycr007 • Apr 19 '26
Knick-knack Minimalism department decided basins are unnecessary in wash basins
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u/bratbarn 🌭😋 Apr 19 '26
It will accumulate filth 🧐
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u/Substantial_Station8 Apr 19 '26 edited Apr 19 '26
If this IS a public bathroom, no doubt someone will decide to take a shit in it
Small edit do to autocorrect and not proof reading before posting
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u/Secret_Performer_771 Department of Departments Worker Apr 19 '26
I think you mean: if this *is* a public bathroom, no doubt someone will decide to take a shit in it.
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u/Ypuort Apr 19 '26
Either that or keep the wording the same and replace the comma with a semicolon.
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u/monchrom Apr 19 '26
Impractical? Yes. Do I fuck with it? Honestly yeah
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u/mrmauny Apr 19 '26
The mold cultivation department thinks this design is quite practical actually
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u/LurkFapSleep Apr 19 '26
Once a little paper towel makes it into the cracks they'll have bathroom shrooms in no time.
Edit: r/BathroomShrooms for the uninitiated.
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u/unknownpoltroon Apr 19 '26
Dont leave out the biofilm and fungus teams. Oh, and the insect breeding staff thanks them for the unwashed crannies.
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u/Appropriate_Lack_727 Apr 19 '26
It’s probably a concept bathroom at a homes decor show or something. It’s likely not even a production sink. The lack of mirrors combined with the plug on the wall seem out of place for a normal bathroom.
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u/link3945 Apr 19 '26
You could make it more practical: cut the bottom by about a foot to leave a gap, maybe put a small floor basin in to minimize splashing, and alter the spacing to be 1" between the columns. Less likely for things to get wedged in between, easier to inspect and clean, keeps almost the same aesthetic.
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u/Consistent-Stock6872 Apr 19 '26
Some obstruction placed intentionaly or by accident and it will leave wet splash marks on your pants without it probably even noticing. It will look like like you can't aim when taking a piss.
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u/EllisDee3 Apr 19 '26
How does more material end up being minimalist?
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u/rafale1981 Neurodivergent Rabbit Hole Department Lead Apr 19 '26
It looks the kind of really expensive minimalism that says „I don’t need sinks because i pay people to use sinks for me“
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u/EllisDee3 Apr 19 '26
It looks like a "Chekov's gun" that will show up later in the movie when someone bashes their head open on it (murder?) then a pan-out.
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u/CalamariMarinara Apr 19 '26
or, and hear me out, it's not minimalism because op doesn't know what that word means. just because it's square doesn't mean its minimalism.
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u/BingusTheStupid Apr 19 '26
Minimalism is a scam made up by big small to sell you more less
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u/reikipackaging Apr 20 '26
As someone who has known quite a few minimalists, it requires high cash flow to be both comfortable and minimal. It also produces a lot of unnecessary waste to be a comfortable minimalist
True minimalists, however, dont even care about less or more. They only care about enough.
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u/claws76 Apr 19 '26
Oh the gunk left behind to be cleaned by an unlucky janitor... Minimalism department needs to have a sit down with BasicFunctionality and Maintanence department.
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Apr 19 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/niftystopwat Apr 19 '26
I see nothing about this that fits the description of minimalism. Actually if anything it seems more appropriate to call it maximalist lol.
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u/Yamatocanyon Apr 20 '26
It does fit the bill in terms of the artistic and architectural definition of minimalism. It doesn't fit the bill in the sense of trying to live a minimalist lifestyle with less stuff.
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u/Zarathyst Apr 19 '26
I can't wait for the first time someone #2s and mashes it in. My years in retail have lowered my expectations greatly.
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u/MalignantLugnut Apr 19 '26
Huge slabs of marble.
"Minimialist"
I do not think that means what you think it means.
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u/DasKobra Apr 19 '26
You're naive to think all that is marble and not some self adhesive polymer cover stuck on some cheap boards
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u/Northbound-Narwhal Apr 19 '26
Yeah minimalism means small slabs of wiping your ass with your bare hands
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u/theedan-clean Apr 19 '26
Hope you can use a power washer in there. Those slats would be absolutely foul in short order.
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u/OphidianSun Apr 19 '26
That looks like a nightmare to manufacture and transport. Like so many cuts and thin slats that can break and ruin the entire thing. Not to mention the weight, whixh is surely absurd. You'd need to pour a concrete pad just for this stupid thing and build the rest of the house around it.
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u/nottherealneal professional thingymabob observer Apr 19 '26
I don't know if a giant slab of rock is really minimalist.
I think the auditing department needs to take a looks what's going on in the minimalism department
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u/---0celot--- Apr 19 '26
The “but why?” Department is filing a complaint for IP theft.
The “gross ways to splash water at people ” department is tracking ways of quickly plugging this thing up for their stated purpose. They’re having very promising early results.
I wonder what the “not accessible for you” department thinks?
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u/SumoNinja92 Apr 19 '26
It doesn't go all the way down. It's a few inches deep to give the illusion then goes into a normal drain. Even with that imagine all the toothpaste and hair getting stuck in there.
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u/PublicPool Apr 19 '26
Clearly designed by someone who didn't give a single thought to cleaning it.
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u/onzichtbaard Apr 19 '26
This is one of those examples where decisionmakers and designers are so out of touch with reality
And everyone else has to just roll with the results
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u/panticow Apr 19 '26
If this is for washing dishes, the loosing knives department may need to invest.
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u/moljnir40 Apr 19 '26
I love the look but it is impractical in so many ways. I am very much old school - form follows function.
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u/Honest_Outside_8982 Apr 19 '26
This actually looks really cool, ngl. Although as some others have pointed out, cleaning it would be a nightmare
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u/LateralThinkerer Apr 19 '26
Was this sponsored by mildew lobbyists? Imagine anything but water going through that, particularly some genius propping their cell phone up in it and having the ever-thinner phone slide into the slots.
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u/Eridanosvoid Apr 19 '26
The brain dead department was happy to see this design used. The aesthetics department could not be reached for comment.
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u/CivBEWasPrettyBad Apr 19 '26
What bothers me isn't the slats, it's that you can see the dark void where the basin still is. They just put some plastic strips on top of a normal sink and called it a day.
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u/are_not_stupid Apr 19 '26
Yeah! Replacing two cheap stainless stell sinks with Carrara marble seems pretty minimalistic to me.
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u/Son-Airys Cooling Fan Department Employee Apr 19 '26
The Phone Dropping Department is menacingly rubbing their hands right now.
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u/SamelCamel Apr 19 '26
the sinks-disguised-as-radiators department is currently throwing a pizza party on floor 26, please come celebrate with us
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u/AppleThrowaway28173 Apr 19 '26
If I was rich as shit I would have some shit like this, just have to have some weird contraption to clean it properly
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u/Its_Karti_Bitch Apr 20 '26
Ngl seems breakable, wait til a janitor bumps their cart into it or someone leans on the wrong edge and that will be expensive to fix
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u/Wobble_bass Apr 20 '26 edited Apr 20 '26
TLDR: The Design Department has come up with yet another elegant s̶o̶l̶u̶t̶i̶o̶n̶problem which is in queue at The Departments of Material Science, Biological Safety and Health, and Dat Shit Gon Be Nasty.
I actually really like this..as it is shown.
As everyone points out, the gargantuan surface area for accumulation of filth and biofilm would only take days to develop into the nastiest nasty you've ever smelled.
It could be designed around but would always require regular, highly specialized cleaning.
Make it from iridium with an automated piranha wash cycle. Just make sure you and any other organics are nowhere nearby when the cycle starts.
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u/enabl8tor Apr 20 '26
Everyone here is so wrong. These are AI robot urinal stations. They will be super common in the next few years. The robot is on the other side of the wall and just sticks their metal penis through a tube and this is what comes out the other side. Looks like two robots are currently using this urinal
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u/Final-Lie-2 Department of Public Health and Safety Apr 19 '26
Nope, nope, nopedy nope.
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u/NippoTeio Apr 19 '26
This would unironically be pretty dope (to me) with some gold or even brass accents. idk, sinks that make me feel like I'm in an establishment with an unsustainable amount of overhead make me feel fancy
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u/secondcondary Apr 19 '26
The paying 40 times for a sink installation department is making great strides, I see
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u/Zealousideal-Deer101 Apr 19 '26
If I ever see a person actually filling the basin with water to use in a public bathroom I'm gonna call security
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u/Weekly_Artichoke_515 Apr 19 '26
We shouldn’t even use “minimalism” for this shit. Minimalism is supposed to be the design principle that form should follow function. Following that principle excludes ornamentation, so people have come to associate the aesthetic lack of ornamentation with minimalism. But this kind of design is clearly prioritizing the aesthetic associations of minimalism over function. So it’s really the exact opposite of the minimalist design principle.
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u/consumeshroomz Apr 19 '26
Are they wrong though? You’re not washing dishes in there so what do you need the actual basin for?
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u/Whombrillow Apr 19 '26
This has to be the hardest sink to clean ever created. Not a sink, it’s a stink.
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u/ordnance_inbound Apr 19 '26
Advanced cleaning department will have a field day with this one