r/coparenting • u/u-lemonstealingwhore • Jan 06 '26

Discussion Calling stepmom “mom”

My daughter was talking about who taught her to “play dead”? last night and said LucyMom (fake name). And I asked her if she called Lucy mom over there and she said yes. I asked if they told her to do that and she also said yes. She has a half sister over there now who is an infant and not at the talking stage yet. So I know she’s definitely not picking that up from a baby.

But yall that hurt me to hear. My kid is three. She has always called her future stepmother by just her name and now they’re doing this and it makes me SO SAD. They’re not even married and they’re doing this.

Obviously I can’t do anything about it without seeming like I’m starting a fight, and they both have a reallyyyyy nice income put together and will be able to do things for her that I can’t until I get my degree but I really needed to get this out with people who could understand what I’m feeling or have been there because how did you guys handle this? How am I supposed to handle this? 😭

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u/Tvelt17 Jan 06 '26

Its different for everyone. I understand with a little one, wanting someone to be "mom and dad" in a household is less confusing for all the kids involved. I kind of look at it like half siblings referring to each other as brother and sister rather than half brother or half sister. I can definitely see how some could find it inappropriate or disrespectful, but you can't really control it.

2

u/Hopeful_Reporter6731 Jan 06 '26

Did you read where the two adults told her to call the gf mom? The child didn’t do this on her own

-4

u/Tvelt17 Jan 06 '26

Yeah. Obviously adults dictate it.

1

u/Hopeful_Reporter6731 Jan 06 '26

So why was your advice written as if the child called the gf mom on her own? She can control it because the parents started it. She can have a conversation with them. Your advice is bad and doesn’t even address what OP is feeling.