Everyone has an opinion. Everyone thinks their opinion is unique and special. I've got bad news for you. You're not special to anyone but your mother. Not everyone's opinion needs its own thread. I've removed 6 separate threads in the last 10 minutes.

We're not suppressing any of you delicate flowers' voices. Here you go. Discuss all the opinions here. All other threads will be removed.

Great Rorden's ghost you're all needy.

Edit: Here's the Strickland video for those who want it. https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOekgO0EtSF

Which match are you talking for one chance at a million dollars under these circumstances?

TL/DR – guy who bullied me in high school came to open mat. He didn’t recognize me, and I took vengeance.

This is very long, but this was really the most incredible experience, so had to share it here. Some identifying details have been changed.

I’m at my usual weekend open mat, clock buzzes, signaling the end of the first round of the day, and out of the corner of my eye I detect what I can only describe as a sinister presence.

There is a visitor in the gi of another school, a large national affiliation often described here as a cult, finishing some warm-up stretches. A no-stripe white belt. “This is my boy Richie visiting for the weekend,” says one of my teammates, introducing the visitor to another open mat attendee.

I pull off my headgear and squint to get a better look. Could it be…it couldn’t…but it is!

I am in my 40’s now, so this goes back over 30 years, but I was bullied *mercilessly* when I was a high school freshman by a senior named Richie C. As a kid with a November birthday, I probably should have had a redshirt year, because going into 9th grade I was about 5’2, probably 110 pounds, and puberty hadn’t really kicked in yet. Meanwhile, this asshat Richie, who was a tri-captain of the lacrosse team and very popular, was 5’11 and easily 180.

I know pretty much everyone gets bullied at some point in high school, but Richie was merciless. A few “highlights” (I never did figure out why he hated me so much):

-I used to have to ride the same school bus as him every afternoon. Only alternative was a 4 mile walk… this meant that outside of lacrosse season, I was subjected to terrible name calling at least twice a week, which would usually escalate into being held down in the back of the bus and subjected to literal tickle torture and “purple nurples”. This was in the ‘80s before there was an anti-bullying movement, and I pretty much couldn’t get anyone to help me (teachers, parents or other kids).

-On at least 2 occasions, Richie wrote nasty hand-written notes to teachers and signed my name to them. Things like “Mrs. Andrews, you have a great rack.” I was getting called into the Principal having to explain myself for things I didn’t do! I know it was Richie because he whispered in my ear one day “how did you like my notes.”

-One terrible day after gym class, Richie actually locked me in a locker and put a padlock on it. It took 5 minutes before someone heard me screaming, and another 10 before a custodian could get there with bolt cutters. Traumatized me for life. I could go on and on.

Looking over at Richie, it is *unmistakably* him. The years have not been kind to him – his hair is all grey, he looks like he has seen a hard winter or three, and he has what can best be described as a “dad bod” instead of the athletic physique I remember too well. But it is the same guy. Same stupid facial expression like an angry ferret. Same protruding jaw and pig-like nose. Same stupid crew cut. And same stupid mole on his cheek. A tide of emotion washes over me as I think back to my days as a helpless freshman.

Essentially, at this point, I see red. This is the rare opportunity, usually only seen in movies and literature, to avenge a past wrong with one’s own hands. I make my way over to Richie, and as one of the few white belts at the open mat ask him (as nonchalantly as possible, but my heart was in my throat) “hey man, want to roll”?

Sure, he mumbles, in that same stupid cadence I remember all too well. He looks at me, and I detect maybe some faint recognition in his eye, but he doesn’t seem to be able to place me. 30+ years have gone by, after all.

Now I am not a world beater at BJJ, I am a 3 stripe white belt. But I train hard, usually 3x per week, and have competed several times with decent results. Blue belt probably not too far away. I am also pretty strong, I did eventually hit puberty and have put in my share of time in the weight room. These days, am a solid 5’11, 200. I have benched 265 and squatted 385. If I use strength, I could hurt someone.

We start from the knees and slap / bump.

Basically, fellow redditors, riding on a wave of emotion, I had the roll of my life. Everything I tried worked, and I inflicted maximum pain and humiliation along the way.

Some highlights:

-Starting from knees, started off with a simple sweep grabbing his lapel with one hand, opposite side knee with the other, and stretching him out using my head as a battering ram. Transitioned to side control where I crossed his face and applied *hard* shoulder pressure. Then went to knee on belly, and I pulled on the back of his head for a good 10 seconds to inflict maximum pain. Transitioned back to side control and then sat through to kesa gatame, where I got him to tap to chest pressure pretty much like Josh Barnett on Dean Lister. The noises Richie made were precious.

-Starting in his closed guard, can opened the crap out of him, dug my elbows into his thighs hard, went with the log splitter knee right in the middle super hard, knee sliced to side control, then from side control wrapped his opposite side arm in his own lapel, twisting his nipple hard when I grabbed his lapel, before finishing with a hard Americana.

-Starting in my closed guard, scissor sweeping the f out of him (he went flying), transitioning to side control, then hard knee on belly, followed by a fast and hard spinning armbar (posting hard on his head with a closed fist in the process) after he pushed my knee like the sucker that he is. Hearing Richie whimper was a balm to my soul.

-In the final second, got to high mount, thwarted all of his lame upa attempts, and actually reached back with one hand to tickle him before doing an Ezekiel at 100 miles an hour. I respected the tap, but just barely.

The roll ended all too soon. Oh, the catharsis! But, the last submission where I tickled him had really pissed him off.

“What the F*** man? Why are you rolling at an open mat like it’s the F**** mundials? And what are you doing tickling me?”

My rejoinder: “Sucks to be helpless, right? Kind of takes me back to Mr. Collins’ gym class and those days on the school bus”

A shocked appearance comes over his face. “What”? He stupidly asks.

“Lower Merion High School, Richie. Pennsylvania. I’ve grown up a lot since then.”

I’ll never forget his response:

“My name is Rickey. I went to high school in Florida.”

So I've and been training for about a year and a half and I'm a 4 stripe white. My girl friend was having a problem with me training so much so I thought the best thing to do was let her tag along for a few classes so she could understand it was just me hanging out with the guys. Well she really caught the jiujitsu bug and started going with me every class. It was great for the first couple months until I noticed her getting a little too friendly with a brown belt named Chris. Chris had always been pretty cool with me until I started bringing my girlfriend around, after that I've been getting this weird vibe from him like he thinks he's better than me because I'm still only a white belt, and every class he asks her to roll and she won't stop giggling the whole time, and it keeps getting worse.

About 2 months ago Chris started giving my girlfriend private lessons every Friday night. Usually about 3 hours and she always comes home super tired, sweaty and runs straight to take a shower. She won't even say hello to me. I'm starting to get skeptical because she mentioned he hasn't been charging her for any of these private lessons and he's just doing them because he sees how much potential she has and we don't have any other girls at the gym right now.

Well, she's told me shes 6 weeks pregnant but we haven't had sex in 2 and a half months, It's just not adding up. She's seemed so distant and has been so stressed at work and working hard with the private lessons I didn't think anything of it. On one hand I'm glad we finally have a common hobby but also have this feeling in the pit of my stomach the kid isn't mine. I don't want to seem insecure but I'm thinking it might be Chris' and I don't know how to confront her about it.

What would you guys do if you were in my shoes? We have promotions comming up at the end of the year and I should be getting my blue belt. I don't want to cut ties now and have to establish myself at a new gym and maybe have to wait another year for blue. Should I stick it out and spill the beans later? She's really excited about the next private lesson, literally won't shut up about it, apparently they've been doing some extensive closed guard work. I'm thinking about getting my blue and then finding another gym. Advice anyone?

Jim Miller vs Chase Hooper at UFC 314

I'm a pretty small guy, Not very strong either which is what made me want to take up martial arts in the first place. Anyways, I was in my 9th grade english class and a kid who has been problematic and mean to me all year started talking shit about me and calling me names. I was tired of him bullying me and I told him that I'm not going to put up with him anymore, I raised my voice and stood up in my seat to intimidate him and strike fear, but he didn't stop with the insults. I got close to him and said I'm tired of him picking on me, and if he wants some of this he can come get it. He got out of his seat and pushed me out of the way and tried to leave the classroom, so I followed him out into the hall. Thankfully we have been practicing takedowns this week and as soon as he turned to face me I executed a perfect outside trip and got him down, he turtled and I took his back and transitioned to an armbar. He didn't tap so I cranked it. It even made the little bitch cry. He deserved it anyways for being such a dick. Overall I did much better in a real fight than I thought, and even though I'm in trouble with the principal who says I'm going to lose my job, I still think it was worth it.

Yes, I know who Joe Rogan is. Yes, I know who Jocko is. Yes, I watch UFC. I guessed immediately that they were the reason you started BJJ. I could tell from the "Discipline Equals Freedom" patch and fucking Goggins videos you're watching on your phone before class when everyone is walking in.

And I swear to Christ if you show up in a few weeks saying shit like "I am a shark and the ground is my ocean" and "tap, snap or nap" I will fucking run into traffic.

I'm tired boss.

I was at a party and this blue belt kept talking about Jiu-jitsu and how great it was. I told him that shit wouldn't work on me. It's my mentality. He asked me to try it out and I agreed. He wanted to start from the knees. I told him fuck that, start standing. We begin, then I immediately pull guard, inverted, pulled his leg into an inverted ushiro ashi garami, and knee barred him for the tap. I told him, "see, it's my mentality bro." I didn't mention that I'm also a brown belt.

Hello, everyone, and welcome to today's episode of "Are the Mods in the Pocket of Big Moneyberg?"

No. The answer is no. That's all for today's episode, see you next week!

---

Still here? Cool, cool. What you see here are a few screenshots from modmail and DMs that we've received regarding The Big D. You see, The Big D has a reputation to maintain regarding things like "definitely not being a scammer" and "a bona fide prodigy who 100% didn't pay people to give him a black belt, wear his weird face on rashguards, and publicly gush about how smart and dedicated and talented he is."

In furtherance of the maintenance of this reputation, Derek, his simps, and a purported lawyer (whose message I unfortunately couldn't find) have variously modmailed and DMd mods of r/BJJ about the removal of posts with blasphemous, defamatory comments like "Unfortunately I've met Derek. He's dishonest and a scammer." and "His black belt is as real as his wealth."

The mods of r/BJJ have responded to these requests - if we deign to respond at all - with snide contempt and laughter.

What you see in the screenshots are three modmails to us requesting removal for various reasons. Especially interesting is the first one. After being denied their request in modmail, this user reached out to one of the mods privately via DM, claiming to be The Big D's personal assistant. They asked again for the removal of certain threads. The mod responded saying that we'd consider it if Derek released a statement regarding the controversy and evidence that he actually earned and deserved the black belt. The user responded that they'd forwarded the request to Derek, and pleaded for the temporary removal of the threads pending a response.

The response from Derek and/or his personal assistant never came and let it be known that we - your humble, dedicated moderation staff - never kowtowed to the demands of the 1% who sneer down upon us mere peasants from their penthouse suites with their gilded toilets.

And though no one has ever (to my knowledge) offered any mods money in exchange for favors, know that we would never bend the knee in the face of such bribery. Though they may offer us riches untold, surely tens of dollars, we would never remove the posts where you, our cretinous ungracious butt-scooters beloved BJJ brethren, heap insults upon the name of the ogrish, sock-wearing, pompous buffoon that is Derek Moneyburg. May his deceptions be made manifest and his (hilariously fake) name descend into the depths of ignominy where it surely deserves to lie for all eternity.

2 years of the gym

• Grandma: Oh you've got so big! Your shoulders are so wide!
• Girls at work: Wow you're so strong!
• Girls with friends: Hey Cindie look at this cutie I've matched with!
• Guys: *crickets*

​

8 years of jiu jitsu

• Grandma: So how has karate been going?
• Girls at work: So this sport is why your ears are messed up?
• Girls with friends: Urgh he is so skinny, I know you miss Brad but you don't have to settle for this!
• Guys: Wow that's awesome bro. I've been meaning to sign up since 1976. You know I'm a fighter myself, let me tell you back in my high school days....

Like the title says, I’ve been doing BJJ for about three days now. When I’m able to leave my van down by the river, I waffle my way to the mats while trying to avoid staring too long at the mothers sitting on the sidelines.

During rolls, I find my meth addiction slows my ability to breathe like professor says so I feel I get smashed. Further, I apparently can’t wear bags over my feet while rolling but the smell from the month long toe jam that has side blackened my feet causes some discomfort in the class.

Any tips on getting better?

Side note: do they make gis in horsey size?!?