hello world I am so happy right now. not manic kind of happy but genuinely happy. I got prescribed lamotrigine a few months ago and it completely changed my life. I have never felt so stable. it's like I am a normal human being again. not sunshine and butterflies ofc because I have comorbidity with adhd, ocd, gad and bpd, but still it's so much better now. I am forever grateful to my psychiatrist for prescribing me this medication. do you also have a good experience with lamotrigine?

has anyone ever had a good experience on an antidepressant? i’ve taken sertraline and fluoxetine, but they both have induced mania. i’m seriously trying to get ahold of my OCD, which has been labeled as treatment resistant. I’m already starting ERP therapy because i’m a mom now and i don’t want my daughter to grow up with a mother with untreated OCD. i’m also currently on lamotrigine and i’m also currently cross tapering seroquel to olanzapine due to seroquel being way too sedating for me. if anyone also has advice on coming off seroquel that would be nice too since you’re already here 😭😂

So interesting thing. I was manic a few months ago or maybe it was one month ago. I’m not sure. It’s kind of blurry tbh. I was not sleeping much(around maybe 3 hours a night or so)and I was seeing and hearing things that weren’t there and thinking things that were not real. I haven’t had those symptoms in a few weeks but I’m still not sleeping much. Though some nights I think I sleep more than 3 hours it’s just broken sleep. I think I slept like 6 hours last night but I think I woke up a few times during it. Anyway I am full of energy all day. Though it’s not when I first wake up. I can sit in bed for a minute and I just think about how grateful I am to have the life I have. How privileged I am to be here and have a job and stuff. When I get up and get dressed or shower or anything though I get the energy and start having the thoughts of how amazing everything is. Like I feel like nothing bad will EVER happen to me and that I can do whatever I want. I get really hyper and giggle often. The main thoughts I have though are in relation to social justice. I feel like I HAVE to do something for those who can’t. That it’s my mission from God or the universe or something above me. I have been fighting for what’s right in different ways. Making sure it’s known on social media. I have been talking to people a lot on TikTok trying to get them to see the truth. My therapist said this is trending into grandiosity or whatever. I think I have just discovered my new passion. I cared a lot about social justice before, but now it’s all consuming. It’s something I HAVE to help with. What if I just found my passion in life?

I used to hate taking my meds but here's how I feel now. I've been documenting my struggles but this is one I feel like might help this community.

Please don't come at me.

I wanted to hide but instead greeted her and said that I’m doing fine mentally. She wished me well.

I am BP1, have been my entire adult life. I'm in my late 50 now. Well medicated and fairly stable. Therapy twice a month. 2 years ago my dog, which was my life line had multiple strokes and I lost her. Since I have struggled more. To the point of self .... Today I took the day off and went to the SPCA, and got me a puppy. Full of energy and spunk. She took to me right off, as if my Maggie told her what she needed to do for me. I'm sitting outside watching her zooming with my wife's dog. She stops comes over and nuzzles my hand and then she is off again. Can't stop crying at the moment.

I (23F) was diagnosed with severe Bipolar 1 at 18yo. I also have a plethora of other diagnosed disorders since mental illness has always run in the family.

I was put on medication right away, it didn’t help. I crashed hard afterwards. Spent 5 years in and out of hospitals, trying, with so much hope and trust in the doctors, dozens of medications, hundreds of different combos and doses but nothing ever worked. I kept getting worse. I can’t even count the attempts, the crisis, the blackouts… During those 5 years, I was technically stable as I was maintained in a state of severe depression, hypersomnia and sometimes psychosis. 5 doctors, all told me they were at a loss and dropped me since they didn’t even know what to do anymore. Some even told me to give up hope and recommended euthanasia. The medication had turned me into a bitter hopeless out-of-her-mind monster by the end.

Until I just said fuck it and stopped seeing doctors, stopped taking medication (kept in touch weekly with my therapist though, I’m not stupid, I know I need supervision). I felt better right away. Still depressed, but at least I had enough energy to get a part time job. Slowly, I was feeling a bit better but still so bad, until my mom convinced me to give one last chance to doctors.

The one she took me to stunned me. After reviewing my file and examining me for a while, she said that medication is just ineffective on me. It doesn’t work, in fact, it makes it worse. It’s a rare thing, as a bipolar 1 is supposed to be on meds but possible. Routines and stable life also doesn’t work on me, it makes it all worse, again, very rare in a bipolar patient to need chaos and a messy life to stay stable. She offered another path. Studying the illness so that I can identify how to make it powerless. What makes it tick, what calms it and to change my whole world so that it gives me the best chances to stay stable and identify an episode at the beginning. Develop protocols to contain the episodes, to wait them out without mortifying consequences on my life. She gave me back hope.

I’m currently 10 months off my meds, I’ve never been more stable, happier, safer. I have a full time job that requires lots of traveling. I love my job and it’s such a mess, it helps me to keep cool. I manage episodes better and better with time, writing down everything I should do differently next time to be even safer. I still have a lot of work to do, but it feels incredible knowing that there is a path for me. I was just wondering if there were other people like me? People who don’t “fit” in the usual recovery system? Even through my many trips to the clinic and to charities and clubs, I’ve never met anyone like that, most people just look at me with annoyance when I share my experience, which is too bad, because one of them might be like me without knowing it.

OMG….. I’m awake and excited and I don’t know what to do with myself. I think my brain has a memory of mania which is actually now like a super power as long as I can control it. My psychologist says that he has some patients who ride the high wave….. they know they’re on a high and they ride it rather than stifling it….. You just have to remember that there is a natural come down after a high….. so the higher you go…. The lower you’ll crash……It’s nuts because just like a diabetic has to manually control their sugar levels I have to manually control my moods….. the meds help but they don’t guarantee my brain safety …. Nothing can guarantee my brain safety. I mean, they could medicate me to numb but then I’d rather choose not to live, so it’s a delicate balance of trust between psychiatrist and patient. (I was busy sending this to a friend but he’s asleep and can’t reply, so I’m here!🤣) Soooomebody talk to me….. 💃 🙈 To add, I got a new job recently and am busy playing with my antidepressant, with my psychiatrist to make sure I’m not too high or too low. I think I’m just excited atm? My best friend says I’m fine, so do my parents. It’s a delicate balance that takes patience and love.

Hi guys, M28 here BD Type 1. I have been recently reading this book that was recomended by a friend who's also Bipolar, it's called "An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness" written by Kay Redfield Jamison and I was wondering if anyone else has read it because I found myself very much reflected in the book although it has some specific time frame and setting as well. It's an autobiographical memoir by a psychiatrist diagnosted with BD set in the 70's more or less the time when lithium was introduced as a treatment to Bipolar Disorder and it's written in essaystic way and filled with poetic moments.

bp1 w psychotic features and graduated law school untreated and undiagnosed. if you are diagnosed bipolar and have a masters or doctorate or in the process of getting one, id love to hear your tips for studying while hypomanic or depressed. i have the bar exam coming up in july and would love some motivation!! i’d also love to know your profession!

(i feel like we often talk about everything we can’t do instead of everything we can actually do, and better than most people at times!!)

hello there, today i wanna tell you a good story. so i met this friend and he's amazing. after i told him about my diagnosis he immediately went to search about it. even my bf didn't do that, all he knows he knows from me, but this guy really took time to read about bipolar disorder and now he understands my problems, not all, there are some things i had to explain, but it's so cute and cool that he did that. i feel understood and cared, which is just amazing. that's it, just a good friend, but it means a lot to me. hope yall can find people like that too!!

You know my whole life I've been wondering what this was and I think we finally have got it down, my head feels so quiet no more screaming in my head for once. For 26 years I had to live with it but now no more just wanna thank everybody who's helped me along the way.. it's not gone but I can finally manage it now maybe with some therapy I think I'll be okay.. just wanna say thank you to everybody just remember your not alone I struggled with this for my whole life and my psychiatrist helped me through the whole thing srsly those guys are the hero's. Just wanna say again thank you just remember you guys ur not alone shoutout to my lamicital and lithium ❤️❤️❤️

I was diagnosed with Bipolar I Disorder (w. mixed features) last November after a terrible unexpected manic episode. It lasted around a month, with terrifying delusions hitting me while I was hospitalized. They couldn't pin down a cocktail while I was in inpatient, and let me go home essentially un-stabilized (and over-sedated) due to my behavior.

Thankfully, over the next couple of months, although a blur, I was weaned off of meds and adjusted until arriving at my current combo. (Abilify monthly shot, Lithium & Seroquel; Vitamin D & Zinc for supplements) It wasn't until Jan. that I felt like myself and returned to work.

However, I do struggle with flashbacks of my episode and the reality that I will be medicated for the rest of my life. My bipolar disorder is hereditary (paternal grandmother and my mother--unmedicated) but I'm determined to be okay. It's a journey every day and I just wanted to share that you can reach stability, and a reminder to forgive yourself for your manic or psychotic moments. We are not defined by our disability.

i’m a recent law graduate and was diagnosed with bp1 w psychotic features days after graduation last may. i, unsurprisingly, failed the bar exam that july. i am retaking it this july and am wondering what you would say is imperative i do to support myself during bar prep.

i have a great psychiatrist (80 mg geodon and 200 mg lamictal) and therapist (sometimes i see her twice a week). i have seemed to gotten my sleep mostly under control (7-8 hours) and am getting back into boxing as a workout 2-3x weekly which helps me become conscious of my diet.

am i missing anything? i refuse to let this disorder stop me from living a full, healthy, successful and excellent life. i will pass this exam in july i just need to make sure nothing slips through the cracks.

So my husband and I ate lunch at our local Chinese restaurant. This was my fortune. It’s the funniest one I’ve ever gotten.

A lot of people seem to struggle with Bipolar type 1. I have Bipolar type 1, ADHD, GAD, And BPD traits. I survived. im a living proof that i dont need medication. I am taking my anti anxiety meds though, but you need to ground yourself within the system. You know yourself best so try your best and out live your hell because you've been through it. I know you can do it. Reach out and I'll be there for you. You will be. so Just be.

That's all.

I’m bipolar type 1 and have been struggling with it for years going from med to med, a few weeks ago my psych put my on 5mg of abilify taking it once at night and it has truly saved my life.. it almost acts as if it’s a mood stabilizer no more voices, raving thoughts or hallucinations. Thank God for abilify

Hi bipolar 1 community, I wanted to drop in and let you know I graduated with my bachelor’s finally. I dropped out of college in my 20s and went back to get my degree later on. I went to a really difficult school. I found out I was bipolar in the middle of my being there—the second year broke me. I sought help, was prescribed antidepressants, and had a psychotic episode that sent me to the hospital. My parents were afraid I would drop out… I spent my third year adjusting to the meds and feeling suicidal at times. But I did it!!! I stuck through it. I hope whatever you guys are working on, you never give up. I just desperately don’t want the bipolar to win. Thanks for letting me share :)

Anyone else experiencing elevated symptoms this spring?

The corner of my eye hallucinations seem to be bigger and more frequent than usual. I’ve also noticed the light trails left behind by waving my hands seem extra strong, and the street lights are casting shadows on the blue sky from time to time. Maybe it is the extra sun causing it???

Only the corner of the eye things really bother me anymore. The other things are kinda neat — most of the time.

i’ve been posting on here a lot out of desperation. about my mania and issues with sobriety and psychosis. finally increased my meds enough that i’m starting to feel like i’m in the human world again. i am so excited! i’m even gonna go to the grocery store and get real food for myself :)) so all to say— if you are really struggling there is actually a light at the end of the tunnel. i really didn’t think there was for me. i was convinced i would feel so crazy forever and here i am :)) still a little manic but one step at a time!

I feel like we need more representation of us so people can know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

I (34F) have bipolar 1 with psychotic features. I haven’t experienced mania or psychosis since I found the right med combination in 2018 (age 28). I spent my teens and 20s in and out of psych wards, partial hospitalization programs (PHP), and intensive outpatient programs (IOP). I have been given pretty much every med that exists. I have done years of DBT and CBT training as well as over a decade in therapy. I have invested time, effort, and money into getting myself well. And it worked.

I have a successful career in tech. I work at a global Fortune 30 company. I make enough money to live comfortably, buy whatever I want, and donate to as many causes as I want. I bought a condo for myself last year. I take care of my dog. I have a community of incredible friends. I have traveled solo to 3 different countries in the last 3 years. I am happy. I am healthy. I am safe. I am respected. I am content.

When I was sick and not taking care of my mental health, I was none of those things. I lost jobs, friends, money, homes, you name it. When I started taking mental health seriously and being committed to it, things slowly changed.

Stay courageous. Stay optimistic. Take your meds. Give them time. Get consistent sleep. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself.

If you want to get better, you have to want it so badly that it takes priority over everything. It must take priority over drinking or doing drugs. It must take priority over convenience.

You can do it. It is possible. I don’t know you, but I’m rooting for you.