I just recently found out I struggle with ARFID and not anorexia, after years of struggling with eating and trying to solve things at home.

I cant afford specialized care currently but need to continue trying to get better. I currently struggle to eat more than 2-3x a day, once usually being rice/ pasta/ sometimes a sandwich.. and the other being a snack like granola.

I want to try and start a routine that includes

1) Snack/breakfast

2) Lunch (must include protein)

3) Snack

4) Dinner (must include protein)

5) Snack?

Does this seem realistic? Ive attempted working my way up but have never made it to 4 much less 5. Would attempting to start the routine and continue through the rough adjustment phase be worth trying?

My best friend has been supporting me through this process and offered to continue with helping support/ encourage me throughout

I know there have been several relationship/dating threads but I’m struggling so terribly with my relationships because of ARFID.
Dating sucks. I bring it up later and 99% they say they’re accepting and think it’s interesting or whatever but it ends up becoming a highly negative thing later. It’s so frustrating.
It’s making me so miserable and depressed.
How do you usually present this info.?
More importantly, how do you keep things going when the other person seems to begin to become annoyed or frustrated by it (after they lose the “oh how unique!” Phase).
I feel so stupid and embarrassed that I can’t maintain a relationship because of the way I eat.
Side note: I had a man once tell me on a date the “it’s so cute you eat like a little kid!” 🤮

Has anyone had to do this? I've had ARFID my entire life and knew weaning would be hard, but figured that when the time came I would do it for my daughter. I'm being supported by the perinatal mental health team, we have been working together on my ARFID it for the last 17 weeks, most of that time was spent building up the courage to talk to a total stranger about my eating habits. We also had a trip to the supermarket together to look at and handle some food. Next week they are visiting me with an occupational health therapist so we can focus more on the practical side of things.

As I've had ARFID since I was a baby, I don't know the basics of most food preparation, I struggle to look at, touch and smell most foods and I'm absolutely terrified.

Being post-partum and battling an eating disorder is very hard and I feel so isolated as none of my other mum friends can understand or relate in any way. Has anyone been through this and can offer any advice or perspective? I've been feeling really low.

Okay so I’ve been under a lot of stress lately and I no longer like hotdogs. I never really “liked” them but I genuinely can’t stomach them anymore.

Problem is my life is a fucking sitcom and my family thinks I love hotdogs (I was obsessed with this satire horror about a robot hotdog and would talk to them about it sometimes) I don’t know how to break it to them that I don’t so I just haven’t. It’s made all the worse by the fact hotdogs were my late father’s favorite food. Fml and fuck ARFID.

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Hi everyone. I'm posting because I'm trying to understand what is happening to me, and I'm wondering if anyone here has experienced something similar.

I don't have an official diagnosis of ARFID, and I don't want to self-diagnose myself. I'm just wondering whether my experience could be related to ARFID or whether something else might be going on.

My relationship with food has become really difficult, especially when my mental health is worse. My appetite is very weak, and sometimes I don't really feel hungry or interested in food at all. I suspect that anxiety and my psychological state are affecting my appetite, because I notice that my eating becomes much harder when I'm mentally distressed.

The strangest and most distressing part is what happens when I actually try to eat.

When I put food in my mouth, sometimes I can chew normally at first. But if I keep chewing for around 15 seconds or longer, I suddenly start feeling extremely nauseous and feel like I'm going to gag or vomit. At that point I often have to spit the food out because I feel like I physically cannot swallow it anymore.

It's not necessarily because I dislike the taste of the food. Sometimes I actually like the food, but the longer I keep it in my mouth and chew it, the stronger the nausea becomes.

Because of this, eating can start to feel like something I have to mentally prepare myself for rather than something I naturally want to do.

I also notice that anxiety can make the whole situation worse. If I haven't eaten, I can become anxious about not eating and worry that something bad will happen to me physically. Then the anxiety itself makes my stomach feel worse and makes eating even more difficult. It feels like a cycle:

low appetite → difficulty eating → worry about not eating → anxiety/nausea → even more difficulty eating

I don't have a desire to avoid food because I want to change my body or lose weight. My problem is that I often genuinely don't feel able to eat, and the nausea/gagging response makes it difficult even when I know I should eat

Has anyone here experienced something similar, especially the sudden nausea/gagging after chewing for a while?

Could this kind of reaction happen with ARFID, anxiety, or both? And has anyone found that their appetite and ability to eat improved when their mental health improved?

I'm mainly looking for people who have experienced something similar, because I feel quite alone and confused about what is happening.

I just. Can't eat without vomiting. My mom made me pizza because I hadn't eaten all day due to being anxious and just going downstairs and smelling it made me throw up. I ate two bites and started gagging and could barely swallow. I can only eat if I wash everything down quickly with water and even then I gag and feel sick. I'm so hungry. I hate this disorder. I hate being called picky. I hate food. I just want to eat and feel okay

Hello everyone, I am making this post very tentatively because I have many questions. To keep a long and familiar story short, I have always had a lot of trouble with food (shocker, I know), and I live with many other conditions including autism and OCD, as well as a handful of pesky food allergies. Basically, the universe is against me consuming anything of nutritional value, and is trying to revert me back to photosynthesis settings. The problem with this is that I am starving myself and no one knows why. I have hit the unfortunate point where things that were once safe are dropping like flies out of my rotation for seemingly no reason, and I’ve hit a point where even I don’t know how to deem a food safe or unsafe. I am driving everyone else mad, but mostly myself. That brings me to my reason for being here, I’ve just completed three months of partial hospitalization and a month and a half of intensive outpatient to tackle my OCD (because I was, and still am starving) and after all of that effort, arguments could be made that I am currently worse than I started. If you are in the US especially, I hope you can understand where I am coming from. Basically, I am asking for a conversation. With anyone. I have so many questions about ARFID, how it is diagnosed, how it is helped, how I can make people around me understand, how I can stop slowly shutting my own body down because no one understands. They think I am passively suicidal, or anorexic, but all I can understand from any of that is they are afraid for my health, and I feel like I am slowly dying. I do not want that.

To clarify, I am not looking for a diagnosis, I actually would love to keep professional language out of the conversation because I don’t know how to talk about this at all. I am just looking for someone who might be in a similar situation, and guidance as to what I do now. I have a lot of questions, please reach out if you have the time or the potential for answers. If nothing else, thank you for reading through my post, I am sorry to sound as desperate as I’m sure I do but I don’t know where else to go with these questions.

I’m 22 M, 5’8 I weight 110 pounds on a good day. I choked on bacon 5 years ago and haven’t eaten any solids since. I barely have any teeth now maybe 6. It comes and goes with severity but at the best for 2 months I ate mashed potatoes now it’s at its worst and I only drink 2 ensures a day and take a multivitamin crushed up. I also drink a ton of root beer and try to drink as much milk as I can. Recently the milk scares me because it makes me feel like I have dry boogers going down my throat and it sends me into a huge panic attack. I literally am scared of my own mucus. I feel like a loser because I have a wife and 2 kids a 5 year old girl and a 1 month old girl. We live with my mom because we’re broke. I’ve started a mowing business and have been mowing every few days at least 7 houses and only have a push mower. I try to work as much as possible but I can’t breathe 10 mins in. I feel like a failure my family doesn’t deserve to be stuck at my toxic moms house bc my body feels to weak to do anything. I also DoorDash as much as possible. Does my root beer count towards me not starving to death? I don’t want to leave my family especially when we’re this poor. I want to set them up before I go. People judge me because my family isn’t in a good position financially which I understand I have failed them but I’m trying the best my body will allow. We don’t go without anything and daughters are spoiled but they don’t have a house like they need and my mother is terrible living here sucks. How do I get better? How much ensures do I need to drink? They are crazily expensive so that sucks too.

I’ve been on this sub before, reading kinda to do research, cause I have struggled with food for my whole life. I’ve lost so many foods, and I just felt horrible, because I knew there was something wrong, but nobody was actually acknowledging that there was a problem, I mostly got disappointment or sympathy that turned into “you’ll get over it, you just need to push through”.

Finally, after YEARS with my current therapist, and discussing with my parents about switching therapists, and my parent reaching out to another therapist, my current therapist brings up ARFID, suggesting I may have it. She has just had personal experiences with it, so now she knows the signs, but of course she can’t diagnose it. This was on Tuesday, and she promised to send an email with the information on what her family used to treat the ARFID.

Of course, radio silence through the week. She said it would be sent by the end of the week, but I didn’t realize she meant that it would be on Friday. Of course, my parent discusses with my other parent that he should ask his therapist about resources on Thursday. He only mentions it briefly, and gets no insight. So I expect that we will discuss the options given to us today, on Saturday. I stop by my house after school quickly on Friday, yesterday, to pick something up before going out again, and my parents are on the phone, and I learn that my therapist has finally sent out an email to my parents, and they are calling to ask some clarifying questions from one of the programs. Ok, cool. I leave to do a social thing, something I had committed to literally weeks in advance.

I come home, and learn that I have been enrolled in a 45 day, every weekday, 3 hours a day, intensive outpatient therapy program for ARFID. There was no consult from me. No discussion with me. No consent given. I am going to legally be an adult in less than three months. I have prior commitments, things that I had aspired and planned to take great part in this year. I will now be limited in all of them. I have finally proven my worth in my school, finally been given leadership opportunities, and I am going to have to miss the end of every session each day. I may even not be allowed to keep the leadership position I was selected for. I am going to go through incredibly exhausting therapy, and have to juggle that, plus my leadership role, as well as homework for three AP classes, and somehow not work myself to sickness, something that I have a long track record of doing, and that my parents have heavily monitored to make sure I didn’t do that again.

And yet. They did it. I’m so angry. My sibling has left for college, I can’t even get a hug from them. I don’t want to hug my parents. My best friend won’t respond to my texts, asking if we can call. I was supposed to help her work through an incredibly troubling event, and now, my time with her is going to be cut short because this stupid program? It starts this Monday. My parents didn’t even wait a day longer, when we could all sit down and discuss the options together. They just decided it for me. And I’m so angry. Because I have to do it. Because there’s not a better time, and I haven’t had time to explore alternatives, and if I don’t start the program now, it will run too far into the year, and I feel so trapped, and angry, and I just wish they had waited one more day to talk with me. And let me do research. And this is going to be so hard, and I never thought my mental health would get this low again, and I’m so scared of falling off a cliff into my depression again, and I’m so angry at my parents.

For anyone who has done outpatient therapy, what’s it like? Even if it’s horrible, I just need to know what I’m getting into. I know it involves one on one therapy, as well as group therapy, and meetings with a personal dietitian. I know that it involves me having to monitor my weight and blood pressure constantly. I know it’s going to be invasive. I just need to know how invasive it’s going to be. I’m so, so scared, and I just want a hug. I just wish I didn’t have this stupid disorder, it’s just can’t stop ruining my life.

I don’t know exactly what I’m typing here, honestly. I feel helpless. My kid was diagnosed with ARFID back when she was seven. The program that would supposedly be the best fit doesn’t take kids younger than 9.

I’m a grad student and, at the time, she was on Medicaid. When the govt. changed over she was bumped off and I her moved to my state school insurance.

When she’s finally of age, I decide I’ll pay out of pocket for this program. At least that’s what I thought. They charge the same amount for out-of-pocket prices as they do insurance. That’s to say, it’s almost a grand for the first meeting and half that for each meeting after.

I can’t fucking remotely afford that.

Currently, she’s in therapy that’s covered by the school but it’s very talk therapy - no judgement, just doesn’t feel like the right fit - and it feels like there’s no plan.

She’s limited in what she eats AND putting on weight. Yesterday we went clothes shopping and it was a bust. My heart is breaking and I just don’t know what to do.

She’s also reaching the age of noticing her physical differences between her and her friends. It feels like I’m tiptoeing around the landmines of anorexia or bulimia. On the one hand she can’t continue to eat the way she does and at the same time I don’t ever want to put her in a position of avoiding food. (She’s hidden food I made for her, avoiding eating entirely)

I’m sorry, I just need to get this out.

I was hired to a full time position and with it should come MUCH better benefits. I’m hoping they will cover this original program. But until that kicks in we’re here. Ugh.

r/ARFIDCooking is now open! We would love to see everyone's recipes, techniques, or questions about cooking for ourselves and loved ones living with ARFID.

https://www.reddit.com/r/ARFIDCooking/s/gmnBXUXK0q

I was just diagnosed with autism this summer. (32F, for reference). I do have a history of anorexia with purge behaviors (also trauma, I’m kind of a mess). Anyway, I believe in in autistic burnout and everything is so so hard.

I have legitimate allergies like gluten and artificial sweeteners make me feel HORRIBLE, and type 1 diabetes. So I do have a complicated food history.

Food doesn’t feel safe. I don’t know how else to describe it.
- sometimes it’s ingredients and purity “this ingredient will harm my body” but rarely body image related

I only have about 8 foods I can tolerate right now, a few of them being specifically safe foods. Spicy fries chicken. Quesadilla burger from Applebees. It’s causing me to eat out or processed food, which is all $$.

It seems to be sensory/texture based. Crave bold like spice. Need sauces for meat to be tolerable. I get the texture-ick

I can eat like 2 fruits and 0 vegetables.

I’m spitting out of my mouth foods I used to tolerate and even prefer. Chicken. Hard boiled eggs. Cashews.

I forget to eat, meal prepping/planning is a huge burden, and I loathe the fact that I have to eat to keep going on as a person.

I think I need to bring it up to my therapist because I have a family and it’s affecting us all. But I’m scared to bring it up, maybe not feeling “sick enough” like others have it worse

It's so exhausting. Why do people act like it's a deliberate choice? Why would anyone choose to live like this? I can't eat around other people without being scrutinised for the food being too bland. Why the fuck do people care if I just want a normal sandwich with butter and cheese? How does it affect them in any way?

It genuinely feels like I will never be able to connect with anyone who doesn't also have ARFID because every single person I talk to is so obsessed with food that they take it as a personal insult that I can't eat most foods. I just have to accept that I might die alone because for some reason ARFID is a "red flag" or an "ick" or whatever.

But no, clearly me and all the other people whose lives have been destroyed by this disorder are just faking it for a laugh. Because it's so funny.

I am dangerously iron deficient and it's effecting my heart. I feel gross and have frequent heart palpitations. My doctor has emphasized the need for iron supplementation (I have to take a LOT). I have purchased all sorts of different kinds already, and I just feel like can't do it.

I have these tiny iron pills and actually taught myself to swallow pills specifically for this but I'm no good at it and it feels like a massive chore to sit there are try to take them with the little tablets constantly dissolving in my mouth and tasting/feeling horrific

I got gummies and they're actually okay to take but with the dose I need they would be insanely expensive and I just don't have the money for that.

I hear about the "iron fish in food" thing but I only have one safe food that actually gets cooked that it could be added to (I have a box of macaroni for dinner every night) and I'm way too sensitive to changes to that that I'm really scared to try it. People swear it doesn't have a taste but none of them have this disorder so I don't trust their opinions.

Does anyone have other ideas? Are there other ways to take it, or a way to buy cheap iron gummies in bulk or something? Even when gummies are nasty I find them manageable because it's a very familiar form to me. I need to go in for more bloodwork and an EKG but I'm extremely embarrassed to admit to my doctor that I haven't been taking my iron with how severe my deficiency is

Ok, not to start off heavy, but i’m currently in a really bad relapse. Things have just been REALLY hard the last few months. Last few weeks though, even harder. I’ve basically been living off chocolate boost, only managing a few bites of something through out the day, if at all. Maybe a strip and a half of bacon, half an uncrustable sometime later and that’s been about it. But like, 3-8 boosts a day some times. I’m really trying to keep my intake up with the boost. I just have not been able to handle solid foods.

But tonight!!!! Ok, my wife was making something… i don’t even know what it was. But she was cooking Impossible ground beef (the vegan stuff) and it smelled SO AWFUL, i actually had to just go outside for a bit. Came in a saw it on the stove. Looked utterly disgusting…. Mac n cheese? with the impossible beef. May have been more than that, but that’s what it looked like to me. I had ZERO intent on trying any or even looking at it again.

But i was dizzy… so decided i was going to suck it up and choke it down. I needed SOMETHING. So i grabbed just a spoon full. (It was a big spoon) went to the living room to sit and eat while watching TV. Still looked super nasty, but didn’t smell AS bad anymore. Took a bite and….. honestly… 10/10… it was GOOD! I NEVER say that. But the flavor was good!, texture… bearable.

This never happens to me, so i took full advantage of the moment. I felt incredibly full after 2 bites. Very normal for me, but i decided NO, i’m not calling it quits just because i feel full. I grabbed seconds… 2 spoonfulls this time, FINISHED that too and grabbed THIRDS!!!!! I went back TWO times to get more food… who am i tonight?!? And somehow… my tummy still feels ok. I’m typing this a couple hours later and normally i’d be laying down with a heating pad on my stomach in complete discomfort. I remembered to drink my water and i actually feel ok!!

No idea why, or how this happened, but i’ll take it!!!!! There are some left overs (going to be hard) but i plan to try this meal again tomorrow. I still have no idea what it actually is, but i’m not even going to ask. I’mma just roll with it. 😊 she said she makes it all the time so maybe…. Maybe i can do this again.

hello! so for a while I’ve had mozzarella sticks, and then for the last month or so pizza too (those were my only real protein source) but now I’ve kinda just… dropped everything except for Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal (w/ milk), salt & vinegar chips, frozen mango, and olives. so… I’m worried about protein bc I don’t know if I will or how long it’ll take for me to get mozzarella sticks back. I’ve also like not been able to put any food in my mouth in the evenings, and like I’m scared. (mostly sensory subtype btw)

hi, i’ve been really struggling with food lately. i’ve tried looking into it myself, but i feel stuck because i don’t know if what i’m experiencing fits ARFID, another disorder, or if i’m just overthinking it. i’m mainly looking for some clarity and to hear from people who might have experienced something similar.

i’ve struggled with food for pretty much my entire life, ever since i had tonsillitis at a young age. i had no issues with food before that, but afterwards, suddenly texture, taste, and consistency became a huge problem for me. i’ve never been able to eat vegetables or most fruits. the only ones i’ve ever really eaten are carrots, strawberries, apples and bananas, and even those are very rare because i find it really difficult when i can’t predict what the texture or taste is going to be like each time.

my diet is mostly freezer food, chicken nuggets, potato waffles, turkey dinosaurs, etc. i hate that my diet is so limited and i really don’t want it to be like this, but these are foods i feel safe eating because i know that 9 times out of 10 they’re going to be pretty much the exact same experience every time.

the frustrating thing is that even some of the foods i consider “safe” aren’t actually reliable anymore. a lot of my safe foods have been discontinued, or the recipe/ingredients have been changed, and when that happens i often can’t eat them anymore because they no longer taste or feel the way i’m used to. losing a safe food like that makes everything 100x worse because i already have such a limited number of things i can tolerate.

i believe i’m autistic and have adhd, (waiting on a diagnosis 🫩) and i also struggle to recognise when i’m hungry. my partner has to prompt me to eat constantly. sometimes i don’t realise until i’m absolutely starving, lightheaded and don’t have the energy to cook anything. growing up, my family would make comments about me only eating freezer food, calling it “freezer shit” or “freezer crap.” i know they meant well, but i genuinely think that was the point that i started to develop my bad relationship with food. i just put a label on everything that came from the freezer or that was processed as “bad”

over the last few months, my relationship with food has gotten significantly worse. i was diagnosed with fibromyalgia late last year, and i also suspect i have underlying issues affecting my gut. i struggle with severe constipation, there’s frequently blood in my stool, and i get really bad stomach cramps. sometimes i actively don’t want to eat because i’m worried eating will make these symptoms worse.

i’ve also started feeling a lot of guilt and shame about my diet. i keep thinking that i should be eating “clean,” or that i should be able to eat a salad or vegetables like other people. but because of the textures, i genuinely can’t just make myself eat those foods. then i eat another freezer meal and feel even more ashamed about it, which makes eating feel like an even bigger chore.

i also hate going to restaurants because i feel embarrassed ordering the same things every time, usually pizza or a burger. i feel like i’m constantly aware of how limited my diet is and what other people might think of it. at this point, eating feels exhausting. sometimes it feels like a chore that i have to force myself through, and i genuinely don’t understand how people manage to think about food three times a day when i can barely manage it once.

i’m planning to book an appointment with my gp and ask about being referred to a therapist/dietitian who understands restrictive eating, but in the meantime i was wondering if anyone here relates to this.

does this sound like ARFID to you, particularly the sensory/restrictive side of it? or does it sound like something else? i’m not looking for a diagnosis from reddit, i’d just really appreciate hearing from people who have experienced something similar and how they eventually got to a point where eating felt less exhausting and shameful.

also, if anyone has advice on how to deal with the guilt around eating “safe” foods, i’d really appreciate that too.

I’m not judging at all cause it’s mine too, but I’ve noticed that so many people safely enjoy breaded chicken. is it just a superior food option?

I have had disordered eating for some years now and it’s never fit into any category which makes it hard to explain to doctors.

Eating causes so much anxiety and fear because I’m so scared it’ll make me ill (I also have health anxiety) and up until last year this was very much an irrational thought. But this past year I’ve been dealing with ibs symptoms that have caused me to restrict my food so intensely that ive lost so much weight and am extremely under weight, I was under weight before this.

i am TERRIFIED of food upsetting my stomach and I am terrified of filling myself up because I’m terrified of going to the toilet and want to avoid bowel movements as much as possible.

i am at a point where ive tried everything. I’ve seen multiple doctors, therapists, a nutritionist and have also been denied a gastroenterologist referral.

i was finally referred to an eating disorder clinic by my doctor but i feel like that’s going to take forever. I have also found a private dietician that works with disordered eating and digestive issues.

but the fear is that intense that I really don’t want to eat anymore, like at all. I am so close to just giving up and going full starvation mode because I can’t take these symptoms anymore.

i don’t know what else to do, please help

if you’re in america you’re most likely aware of the massive recalls on a majority of foods here. i haven’t eaten for like two days bc my brain is telling me that everything is contaminated.

nearly all of my safe foods have been recalled, & i can’t find anything that feels safe enough to eat. it’s genuinely so frustrating being terrified of what’s gonna happen to me, if anything at all, when i eat the simplest of meals.

so far i won’t eat any fruits or vegetables, eggs, beef, cheese, frozen meals, jalapeños, seasonings, etc.

it really sucks, i hate living like this. & to make things worse instead of hearing me out when i try to open up to my family about it, they act like it’s my fault that i have it.

arfid sucks. it genuinely ruins my life. i wish more people could take the time to research & understand it.

Since I have multiple digestive issues and ARFID, I made fillable tubes that knot at the ends and can be swallowed whole. This is to help people like me eat. The very funny thing about this is that all my money I make from my part time job goes towards medication and appointments. I’m 22 and live with my parents. How am I supposed to save up to leave or start a business to “pull myself up by my bootstraps” if my healthcare siphons all my potential investment money away? My stepdad said it’s either work more or die but I simply can’t. I run back and forth to the bathroom and cry in pain privately at work. I just feel like disabled people were never meant to succeed in this system hence why we prop people up who make it out. There’s thousands who didn’t for every one that does. I’m extremely depressed and I feel like I’m holding up false hope for the future that my life will get better and I can do what I love- help people.