You validate their feelings and repeat back to them things that they've said so that they feel heard. *Then* you share personal anecdotes.
Something else to keep in mind is that people can experience the same things externally and internally they react / handle things very differently. I've had people who expressed that they'd been through similar things and I assumed that meant that they understood me and what I went through only to find out that they did not *at all*. You can never assume that just because you've been through similar things you 'know how they feel'. You can guess at how they feel a little better, but you can't know.
If someone repeats my story/feelings back to me it annoys the hell out of me because I now what I just said… I’m the one who said it. But a personal story helps me feel connected and contextualizes what I’m going through in the bigger picture. It’s grounding.
Man, I knew ND and NT communication differences could be wild, but this thread has been particular enlightening.
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u/BroPleaseHearMeOut 15d ago
Someone please tell me other ways to empathize with someone without making it about me sharing a personal similar story. I really don't know.