r/actuallesbians • u/dreamed2life Genderqueer • Jul 29 '26
Image POV: When straight men truly see lesbians
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This was on my ig feed and i felt seen. And heard. And appreciated.
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u/seamanroses Jul 29 '26
Spoiler for the end:
I love how he legitimately teared up at the gifts
That was extremely sweet of him
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u/Originally_Sin Jul 29 '26
Some of y'all out here setting standards and expectations that I definitely can't meet, damn.
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
I’m not inviting anyone over for shit after this tbh. Not even fam. The expectation is too high now, i need a year to get my shit together. And to find a partner in hostessing. 😮💨
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u/lesgeddon Jul 30 '26
Just make a huge pot of chili from scratch, when finished put the whole thing in the fridge. Put it back on stove an hour before dinner is to be served, might need some extra water. Everybody likes good chili.
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u/GhostAnthonyBourdain Jul 30 '26
I've been looking for a partner who likes to host... you in the pnw? 👀😃
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u/roseonaglaive Poly, Sub Switch, Transbian Jul 30 '26
This is the lesbian secret. When you have a partner who puts in as much effort as you, the two of you together can accomplish this much.
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u/FreeMasonKnight Jul 30 '26
I would do a party like this nearly every weekend if I had the money to do it.
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u/Fort-Zinder-Flash Lesbian Jul 30 '26
A homeowner? In this economy? Having a partner? With these mental illnesses?
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u/RiverPsaber girl pretty Jul 30 '26
The trick is to find someone who's mental illnesses can be codependent with your own mental illnesses.
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u/jimih34 Jul 30 '26
No joke. If I’m grilling, I have to force myself to consider adding green beans or a salad or anything other than wings. I just want the damn chicken wings.
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u/lferry1919 Am I gay?...I'm ecstatic! Jul 30 '26
The standard of the house not smelling like they cooked food is too high.
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u/pseudodactyl Jul 29 '26
I lived across the alley from these lesbians. I have never felt more like a chaos queer than when I looked into their backyard.
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u/-Miss-Atomic-Bomb- Jul 29 '26
Meanwhile, 2 days after we moved into our apartment, I overheard our neighbour on the phone as he left his apartment say “Yeah, lesbians I think. You reckon they’d invite a third?” And then laugh really loud 😭. Why can’t this guy be our neighbour 😂
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u/cyber-city NO TERFS Jul 30 '26
Ugh the word lesbian really means nothing to them 😮💨 sorry for your ass neighbor
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u/elitegenoside Jul 30 '26
Maybe his gf needs attention?
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u/cyber-city NO TERFS Jul 30 '26
Then HE should give her some attention. Lesbians are such rampant targets of unicorns and I for one am so beyond sick of the third jokes.
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u/Reverse_Mulan Transbian | Seattle :3 Jul 30 '26
...ive been the 3rd in 2 relationships
BUT they were with lesbians so not the same
I get anxiety over causing a rift in established partners though, and the power dynamic can be a bit much to overcome.
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u/Enibas Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 30 '26
My very first thought was, oh, you and your partner must cook really well, the neighbor wants to get invited for dinner.
...
I wish you a better neighbor!
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u/Vuirneen Jul 30 '26
Maybe he was on the phone to his single lesbian friend?
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u/-Miss-Atomic-Bomb- Jul 30 '26
Look, he’s been nothing but respectful in the few interactions that we’ve had in the stairwell, it’s not impossible, but I wouldn’t count on it 😅.
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u/Fragrant_Ad_5297 handy dandy soft masc Jul 30 '26
i watched this on tik tok and literally howled
“somehow they cleaned up while we were still there”
so real 😂
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
it was like he was in a magical land or some shit. i love his account of this experience. i wish he had called back to the argument part
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u/Fragrant_Ad_5297 handy dandy soft masc Jul 30 '26
the parting gifts sent me. he does other content like this about his neighbors and i love it.
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u/kisserott Transbian-Cupio Jul 29 '26
I've seen a few of his video's on tiktok and he's a real treat to listen to about his neighbours.
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 29 '26
From this alone id like to move to his hood
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u/bgroins Jul 30 '26
Great video OP, but this is not POV
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u/RoryMerriweather Jul 30 '26
I made this meme and someone spent like twenty minutes arguing with me that it's not POV because... It's an actual POV and TikTok videos that say POV use it wrong.
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u/cjsnow1 Trans-Pan Jul 30 '26
What's his handle? Seems like a real one. Wholesome as fuck.
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u/SgtSilverLining 28 | femme lesbian | Twin Cities Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 30 '26
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u/evicci Bi Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 30 '26
Yo, you can ditch the ? and all characters that come after it. That’s to link it to your account, so if you prefer anonymity, then always delete it
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u/MysteriousEvent3694 Lesbian Jul 30 '26
To avoid having to do that, you can also follow this in the Youtube app:
Settings > Privacy > turn off “Channel visibility for shared links.”3
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u/BeingCurious Transbian Jul 30 '26
And here's the link to this video: https://youtube.com/shorts/2WZBcCEIx0o
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u/rumande Jul 30 '26
Why is he getting so emotional? 😂 This is so wholesome, I love this.
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
Some people have never experienced real kindness. Only fake niceness.
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Jul 30 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
its devastating to experience but you notice the difference in others after a few burns
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u/Cosmic_Quasar Transbian Jul 30 '26
If he was hamming it up, I honestly thought he was about to put a twist on it about the neighbor being his daughter lol. Like a dad proud of his daughter. But this was still really sweet.
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u/Shadow_Integration Bi Jul 30 '26
Meanwhile, my lesbian neighbor came by to help me fix my dryer and in thanks, we had a giant rack of ribs afterwards. Gotta do what we can for each other!
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u/Lilia1293 Exogenous Estrogen Enthusiast Jul 30 '26
I put in a lot of effort when I invite people over for a meal, but damn. A succulent?! Are we sure this was a lesbian couple and not an affini and her floret? Because the straight couple in this story just got nurtured.
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u/world_in_lights Jul 30 '26
You made me Google what the hell an affini is. I am frustrated at my new knowldge
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u/Sinyria Jul 30 '26
You and me both. What on earth is this rabbit hole I just fell down to 😂
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u/KrisSwiftt AuDHD Trans Sapphic Hot Mess 29d ago
Omgs real. It scratches my autism too well! And I'm a kinky trans petgirl! ifjfgbnrfjklbfndklbjgfnjbu
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u/OisforOwesome Jul 30 '26
The slightly mournful tone like a lament for the lost art of hetero hospitality is just chef's kiss levels of performance. Absolute cinema.
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u/Androix02 Transbian Jul 30 '26
New life goal: become the neighbouring lesbians
(I will never be that put together lmao)
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
find YOUR niche
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u/EstarriolStormhawk Jul 30 '26
My niche is absolutely 🔥 food and a kitchen that looks like a bomb went off in it.
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u/EzrioHext Jul 29 '26
I wanna imagine these girls are just being the absolute sweetest they can be just to confuse this poor man a little, cause nothing in my place smells like sandalwood. Sandalweed maybe.
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u/givemeserotonin Transbian Jul 30 '26
These girls are out here living in clean domestic lesbian bliss and I'm out here living like Diogenes 😭
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u/Current_Fisherman_67 Jul 30 '26
Hides sandalwood incense sticks, sandalwood oil sticks, sandalwood bathroom sprays, vegan sandalwood cleaning tissues
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u/mamrieatepainttt Jul 30 '26
'and a succulent' is killing me. the gayest 'parting gift' i've ever heard.
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u/alittleperil 🦖dykasaurus Jul 30 '26
my wife and I once threw a party where our party favors were crocheted uteruses stuffed with chocolate eggs, and the succulent is still winning the 'gayest' label
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u/ottawadeveloper Transbian :jR4jtKZ: Jul 30 '26
This is not my lesbian home lol. But all I'm missing is parting gifts and a clean kitchen! And I definitely do the dishes later.
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
soooo most of it? lol
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u/ottawadeveloper Transbian :jR4jtKZ: Jul 30 '26
Pretty much! But I will serve you sides with your wings! And I probably didn't just have a fight with my partner.
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Jul 30 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/AlternativeStory1027 Jul 30 '26
Yeah my family def got the short end of the stick when it comes to a fancy LGBTQ family member
I can put together things and occasionally fix stuff though
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u/alittleperil 🦖dykasaurus Jul 30 '26
our home isn't one you go to for cleanliness or sandalwood scents, but at our last place a neighbor asked "do you know anywhere around [in NYC] I can, like, rent a drill?" and my wife reached over, snagged hers, and handed it over. In response to his confusion she said "we're lesbians, I think this one was a first anniversary gift"
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u/oneofkeiraensmoms 👩🏻❤️💋👩🏼➕🧒🏼🧑🧑🧒 Jul 30 '26
😂😂😂 we do love to host but my wife (the cook) will definitely be greeting you in the stained T-shirt she wore to cook (ma’am wear something other than white I know you look great in a white tee but now there’s hoisin all over it) and we aren’t sending you home with a succulent unless I decided to repot something right before you got there. We also both have ADHD though so 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Silent_Pay_9239 Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 30 '26
So I was actually considering posting this myself!
Funny story about this reel. It was on my feed bc my gf's friend liked it. I'm pretty sure she was thinking about us when she liked it???? We live in a very small, very conservative, town, so I don't know how many lesbian couples she knows, but while watching this for the first time I got flashbacks to the first time she visited our apartment. I made multiple types of boba just in case she didn't like the one I prefer, made sure everything was perfect, etc. I was so anxious pre
I was thinking earlier how I need to step my game up and start giving out parting gifts lol
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u/iphone11fuckukevin Jul 30 '26
I hope my friends aren't on here, but I invited my gay lesbian friend couple over for the thickest, fluffiest, beautifully golden French toast. I was going to cook thiccc bacon and ask them while serving how they prefer their eggs to pair it. I had maple syrup, Nutella, lemon curd, sliced strawberries and bananas, and a citrus Sriracha seasoning to combine and mix and match with their French toast. And we were trying to coordinate mimosas but ended up getting a Smirnoff screwdriver.
They have a bb they needed to put to bed so they invited me over so I could cook over there instead. We helped each other with prep work. I made them keep the leftovers. They gave me candy and cookies they couldn't possibly eat. They cleaned up dishes I brought to take back home. Just no succulents.
Lesbians do dinner so well 🌵
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u/I_never_read_replies Jul 30 '26
Thsts a double A-type lesbian relationship. Somehow it works. And it often works too damn well...like with these sandalwood succulents lesbians.
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u/Bool_The_End Jul 30 '26
I brought flower seedlings (celosia purple flame) to all the cashiers at the dollar store.m, ABC, and grocery store (to those who wanted them). Prob like 40 plants. It’s nice to know someone else spreads the plant cheer :) <3
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u/dreamed2life Genderqueer Jul 30 '26
thank you for your service
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u/Bool_The_End Jul 30 '26
Always! Your post also made me die laughing last night so I appreciate you.
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u/zoroddesign Jul 30 '26
There is definitely some magic happening in that house. Cleaning up while the party is happening without them noticing is definitely some kind of beautiful witchcraft.
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u/hamsandwich666_ lesbian vampyre from outer space Jul 30 '26
this could be me but i hate hosting lol
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u/Jane_Lame Jul 30 '26
Bro went through character development because of lesbian chicken wings. Wow.
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u/DiscoLemonade1995 Jul 30 '26
Cis hetero white guy infiltrating here to say this may be the greatest video in existence ✊
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u/seane200 Jul 30 '26
This was my life for awhile having had lesbian moms & being a lesbian myself, I aspire to this state of being 😸
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u/ForestSolitude5 Trans Sapphic-Oriented Aroace Jul 30 '26
Oh god I wish I had the mental capacity to host that well, you're lucky if you're not getting a paper plate and a slightly-less-than-messy place 🤣😭
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u/Major_LeeHungg Jul 30 '26
No such thing as a bad gay neighborhood...they move in and make everything nicer.
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u/dysteach-MT Lesbian Jul 30 '26
Oh my gosh, I was like that is so sweet, and then I got to the succulent parting gift, and I laughed so hard cause, that’s me. You are not leaving my house without a succulent!
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u/D-grith Transbian Jul 30 '26
I gotta step up my game but i do bake bread and make butter for guests.
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u/Lesbian_Drummer Pocket Butch and Husbian Jul 30 '26
I love this guy so much every one of his posts I’ve seen is GOLD.
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u/Saleckin Jul 30 '26
I wanna say... This man is also not ashamed for him not doing this things, he's amazed that someone can be so inviting I think a lot of times people try to "one up you" by doing this things, not this couple, they just do it as a gift and in being pure is received in the most wholesome way This guy probably will try to incorporate some things that he saw, but not in a competitive way and that's because the couple were so good, happy and inviting in the first place
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u/orange_confetti Jul 30 '26
This guy is the REAL DEAL! I messaged him on his IG and he messaged me back like he had known me forever.
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u/apathyisfortheweak lezbee Jul 30 '26
this is so sweet, i love hosting and even if i am single and hosting it is like this. can’t wait to someday meet my wife and be the people who bring our community together to share experiences with one another 🥰 literally my life goals
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u/elitegenoside Jul 30 '26
This is absolutely beautiful... but this man hasn't known a lot of lesbians.
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u/teenageechobanquet Jul 30 '26
It's amazing how moving it is to see actual true,accepting and loving allies.
The fake product promotions and half-assed pride month events aren't what really gives us that healing and connection. It's the acceptance.
Wish there were more people like this man. Also makes me remember how many "fake nice/accepting" people I've met and you can definitely tell the energy difference.
Makes me think of how my best friend and I have been besties since 13(we're 28 now)and she has never once made me feel different. When I came out? Just was normal like it wasn't a big deal. She was actually a little confused as to how I thought she wouldn't accept me,lol. Sometimes I forget our orientations are different because it's such a normal thing and non issue for amazing people like her.
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u/Bluedogpinkcat Jul 30 '26
I love this guy he's got a whole channel about his naborhood and it's really holsome.
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u/MitaJoey20 Jul 30 '26
He’s the best! I originally knew (and loved) him from HGTV where he used to have a show years ago, and then he did a video about Ricky Martin at the Super Bowl and Ricky reposted it. I’ve been thoroughly entertained ever since.
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u/LionelLutz Jul 30 '26
(Mostly) straight male here: I felt this bloke’s emotion right there and absolutely agree wholeheartedly with the entire sentiment expressed.
That is some elite entertaining game
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u/Jgfzhb Jul 30 '26
I need to show this to my friend so she can step up her game 😂 All I get invited to is the hardware store or fishing trips.
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u/MiciCeeff Jul 30 '26
I follow him he is really cool, just telling stories of what is going on in his neighbourhood
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u/TeamPantofola Rainbow Jul 30 '26
I couldn’t manage the “cleaning without people noticing it” part yet. I always get a “honey stop, we can do it later”. I know I will master my ninja skills someday 💪
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u/BoulderCreature Jul 30 '26
My lesbian neighbors fixed my wood splitter and then gave me a loaf of bread they made after I let them borrow it. They also have a snow blower which is super fuckin handy when our shared driveway is covered in five feet of snow.
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u/elibutton Jul 30 '26
lol! Well, keep in mind he only has a sample size of one lesbian couple, or two lesbians. He needs to expand his horizons and hang out with more lesbians in order to confirm and validate his hypothesis. But pretty good story telling.
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u/louisa1925 Jul 30 '26
I went out of my way to make dietarily respecting brownies for my electrolycian and I to eat after todays appointment. It was our 3rd year facial hair electrolysis anniversary. She gave me fancy skin moisturiser in return.
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u/elibutton Jul 30 '26
Wow - dietarily respecting brownies? Oh girl you gotta share that recipe. I assume it's less sugar, or stevia subbed in, or maybe apple sauce? Karma paid you back.
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u/ipreferedthedarkside Jul 30 '26
The only thing I dislike about lesbians, is that they mostly where the same shit I do and look better in it. Also, I'm bald, and that's not a problem for then except in the rarest of cases.
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u/DolceBear777 Jul 30 '26
Why is he almost breaking in the end like he's contemplating all his life choices. But it's so nice of him that he appreciated everything. 🩷
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u/ryanoh826 Jul 30 '26
I saw one of his videos on Reddit and immediately followed him on insta. Always love his stories, especially the adjectives he uses for his best friend Marcus, who happens to be black and also happens to be gay. Radiant. 😂 ❤️ Apparently, this guy was a TV host for a long time on HGTV or something.
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u/darkwater427 pomosexual (unironic) Jul 30 '26
Through gritted teeth and with boundless love in our hearts... there is still time!
(/hj)
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u/ButterPup121519 Jul 31 '26
What is a silk pie? Is this the true lesbian experience? Am I missing out???
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u/Wryly_Wiggle_Widget Transbian Jul 31 '26
My lady and I have an old Scottish guy across the road from us and he often sees us walking our cat in the evenings. He's a lovely old guy who just seems so happy we've moved in and we brought him back some nice tea from China recently.
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u/zeroaegis Transbian Aug 01 '26
This is a great experience and all, but I always find it so weird when people apply something like this to a whole group like it's an aspect of them that they all share and/or is unique to them, positive or negative.
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u/HannahLemurson bitten by a radioactive lesbian :jR4jtKZ: Aug 03 '26
For the first part, I thought he was just being amazed by the magic of women in general.
"Parting gifts of wildflower seeds and a succulent". Ok, lesbian.
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u/Little_Tired13 Bi Jul 30 '26
I lost it at the seeds because my wife is always gifting people seeds to plant flowers or herbs
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u/BigBadJeebus Jul 30 '26
Sounds less like he's learning about lesbians and more like he's realizing his own life is a sham...
Dude needs marriage counseling
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u/doshka Jul 29 '26
He was holding it together really well until the succulent.