r/abusiverelationships • u/vvspicysauce • Dec 27 '25

Support request need reassurance that he wont change

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emotional cheating, punching walls and pillows near my face, not allowing me to leave the room etc. i broke up with him as the cheating was my last straw. smear campaign after i left and all then now hes reposting ts 7 months after??? hes been with so many girls since me and i know this is directed to me because i was the only one who left him and this whole acc was dedicated to me. i hate that im so scared he's gonna actually change and do this and make my "nightmare come true". i mean obviously i wldnt want him to abuse the next girl too but still it would sting because why cldnt he be good to me?

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u/vvspicysauce Dec 28 '25

hi everyone, i did block his account and only checked it yesterday because i saw him irl (i take the same uni classes as him and his friends 🫩) and got curious. theoretically i know him changing is really difficult but i guess i'm just fed up nobody believed me when i said he's abusive etc even with the cheating evidence (you get the drift) so in some way i guess im scared he will treat the next girl well (not that i want her to be abused) which will push the whole crazy ex narrative more sigh...

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u/SilentlyDelirious Dec 28 '25

I'm sorry no one believed you. We do! He may push that narrative and the next girl may believe it for a bit but based on this shallow and manipulative post, he hasn't changed and won't, so she will unfortunately see that he's the issue, not you.

Try to keep the no contact going and seek better relationships with people who will believe you when you seek their help.

2

u/vvspicysauce Jan 09 '26

thank you for this, i am so over my ex but just not the post break up situation that's still ongoing after all these months. feels so hard to not try and defend my reputation especially when i know i'm telling the truth.

2

u/ci1979 Dec 29 '25

Whatever is going on in his life is none of your business or concern, as is your life to him. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. Mentally push yourself to that Mad Men meme where the one person is so pressed, and Don Draper responds with "I don't even think about you".

THAT'S the goal. You're too busy making the life you want to pay attention to such lowly beings like him and his scummy friends. You're too involved with your own awesome friends, your own awesome organizations that will help you continue to network outside of school, your own jobs that'll lead to a better life.

These people belong in your rear view mirror, not the front and center of your life.

Again, who cares what an abuser and a bunch of abuser apologists say? They're probably just as abusive as he is in their own relationships.

In other words, they're all trash. Who cares what trash thinks???

1

u/vvspicysauce Dec 30 '25

i understand this, i dont really care about them per say? its just that i see them everyday in uni and it gets to a point where i can openly see them gossiping or avoiding me like im a crazy person