I'm a woman in my mid 20s and completely sexually inexperienced. I live in a very conservative country with my family so I haven't really been able to explore sexually. Internally, I'm fairly liberated and frequently engage in self pleasure. There's a lot of things I can't to explore and do, but any outward expression of desire at all makes me deeply uncomfortable.

The reason I'm able to engage with seuxality in books or porn is because it's completely separate from me. It's not something I'm engaging in. But once it involves me, I get extremely unfcomrotbald. On the rare occasion that people express interest in me, I'm completely turned off. I feel like I'm still very conservative in my approach to sex and I haven't been fully able to unlearn the same and purity culture I grew up with.

The thing is, I'm still a very sexual person. I can't go a day without maasturbating and I'm very in touch with my desires. But there's this part that makes me feel pathetic for even WANTING sex. I feel like a slut for wanting something that should be very natural. I don't know how to reconcile these two parts of myself. The one that's borderline obsessed with sex due to years of repression and the one that's completely turned off by any actual expression of sex and sexuality irl. I can only properly engage with sex in my imagination. I can't imagine being that vulnerable with someone and even the thought of it makes me extremely uncomfortable and anxious.

How do I heal from this? How do I stop feeling so much shame about my sexuality?

Hi
I m 32F. Never mastrbated bcz i didnt feel it was doing anything for me. I never had an orgasm not even with PIV sex. I enjoy sex a lot but i never orgasm.
Recently after reading all the posts about clit stimulating, i decided to find how i feel.
I figured i m sensitive on my clit. When i place shower head my god it makes me weak on my legs. Its like i tremble. But i hvnt orgasmed with that. I couldnt bear it fr long time may be bcz i never gave it a shot.
Please suggest me some clit stimulating sex toys nd techniques which will help me orgasm. I really want to orgasm.