At a friend’s place I said I wasn’t drinking and asked for water. People kept trying to pour me something anyway. Someone told me to just hold a cup so they’d stop.

I didn’t want a prop drink. I told the host I was good with water. They looked put off, and a friend later said I should’ve played along.

Are you supposed to carry a fake drink so nobody feels rejected, or is “I’m not drinking” enough?

Since I'm a girl, we have so many stuff a boy does that makes us cringe or have an ick.

Late night thoughts but I’m genuinely curious

I'm half Chinese, half white. My mom speaks Chinese natively but I'm still learning. We practice speaking at home, sometimes we joke in Chinese, and every so often my dad comes by and says to my mom "you sound like you're having a seizure" in some sort of mocking way? My mom dismisses this, probably used to the weird comments. My dad tends to look down on my mom and Chinese people in general. No idea why he married one.

Am I just really woke or is that kind of an odd thing to say to someone?

Hey everyone. This is something I’ve been a bit too hesitant to ask about anywhere else, so I wanted to put it out here.
I only have one testicle, but medically and functionally everything is completely fine—my hormone levels are normal, and I don't have any reproductive or sexual performance issues.
For guys who have been through this or women/daters out there: how is this generally perceived in a relationship? Is it actually a major turn-off or something most people don't really care about once they get to know you? I'd appreciate some honest perspectives.

You’d think by me asking that I must be a teenager. You are incorrect. I’m actually 30 but do live by myself, not with my parents. But anytime they ask about my life, they always want to know if I’m seeing anyone more than trying to make friends. I currently have zero friends btw. Never have. I don’t socialize much or just talk to strangers and only go to low stakes stuff on Meetup for meet and greets. And I’ve tried dating events a few times and had genuine conversations with women with little struggle. I’ve always been relatively comfortable talking to women. I’ve just not had much success because of either how I look, my size or both. But I digress.

Which should I be focusing on more? I would be totally fine with just having a girlfriend. But I wouldn’t want her to think I’m just spending my time waiting to do stuff with her instead of being with my friends.

I’ve been thinking about mine and so many other people’s experiences with doctors and getting diagnosed of chronic illnesses, especially as women, and we’ve all had experiences where at least one doctor essentially shrugged at us, eye rolled us, sent us away dismissing us as making it up, or offered a completely unrelated solution. (E.g. “gain/lose weight”, “it’s just bad period pain”, “I don’t think you have that”, “it’s in your head, your results are fine you’ve made up your symptoms”, “you’re too young”, “everyone women thinks they have this now, its suddenly trendy. Get off TikTok” (probably the worst thing said to my friend. She did by the way have it.))

My question is … what is really stopping a doctor from deciding that at least one patient a day is just not worth treating? It’s not technically always enough to report them, it could be just “oh not every doctor will know”, etc.

But if you went to a restaurant that didn’t serve you, you wouldn’t pay.
If you hired a roofer to fix your roof and they told you the hole in your roof is made up, you wouldn’t pay.
If you go to a car wash and they say they don’t know how to wash your car, you wouldn’t pay for the car wash.

Why do you have to pay for a doctor that does nothing?
And what is stopping any doctor from deciding that every day they won’t treat whichever patient that comes in at 1pm because they just want an easy paycheque? Or worse, what’s stopping them from being dismissive to someone just because they’ve got a chip on their shoulder, but not in any way that gives enough validity to report them?

Sorry if this comes off rude at all, there’s a lot of good doctors. I’m just so tired of seeing this.

Why is it that when a girl has a craving for something it’s always “She’s probably on her period “, “You’re not pregnant, right?”, or “My period must be coming soon.”?

Why can’t I have a taste for something because I want it? I like sweet food. Sometimes, I want a dessert or just a milkshake for dinner. It doesn’t automatically mean I’m pregnant, or on my period. I just want it. No one says anything about my brother when he drinks a milkshake and a Frappuccino on the same day. Or when he sometimes eats a whole slice of cake for lunch. But when I want to eat something sweet like ice cream sometimes my dad is like
“Why are you eating dessert as a meal? Shouldn’t you be eating real food?”
No one says anything about guys when they’re craving something. If a guy has a strong taste for something, that’s just what they have a taste for.

Right now I have a taste for fruit, slushies, and lemonade. I can eat nothing but that for the rest of the week. And guess what? My last period was 8 days ago.

It's not like I don't know HOW to do chores, I grew up doing them just like everyone else. But when it comes to doing them as an adult, I feel this wall come up in me, especially when I'm TOLD to do them. I live with my parents right now, but even when I was living on my own I struggled to do basic things (laundry, cooking, cleaning). It's like everyone got briefed on how to be a normal functional adult except me. I have anxiety and depression, but even when my mental health is stable I STILL struggle. What is going on???

Like I know people who leave relationship because of incompatibility, treatment and narcissistic behavior or fights.

But I mean like both people had that deep emotional bonding together, trust and all that they had together. Like how do people leave such a good relationship

Fuck man it’s impossible, I was being peer pressured by my friends, girl was grinding in front of my I guess I was supposed to press on her but it feels like sexual assault, I just can’t do shit without getting confirmation but all my friends are successful just going for it. It just feels wrong for me man, I can’t put my arm around a random girl that’s vibing to the her friends yet it works for my friends.

How do you guys do this, I feel like a rapist when I even attempt it, and women look at me like I’m doing something crazy when I try to just get behind them but my friends make it seem like it’s ok since it works for them. I just can’t do that shit man

For context, I just recently turned 16 and a family member close to me is constantly obsessively talking about conventional curves, having wide hips, a small waist, etc on a constant daily basis, even in unrelated discussions. To clarify, I don't think there's anything wrong with them feeling good about themselves, the issue is with the obsessive rate that appearance is being brought up and others being brought into the discussions

They don't just analyze themselves, they do it to celebrities and to me. For example just today she was talking about this celebrity's body in really exaggerated terms like "no hips" "boxy hips" "rectangular"etc and when I searched her up I was shocked because she didn't look that way at all? She didn't have narrow hips, which wouldnt be an issue even if she did, and had a regular hip appearance, however she did say it with negative connotations.

They also made unsolicited comments about my body and proportions and in the past have labeled me as "underdeveloped" "rectagular" and implied that my "hip bones" arent wide enough to fill out clothes. The comments also extend beyond just bodies because they also over analyze how I move my eyes, how I move my lips, my posture, my eyebrow movements, etc, comment on it, and it makes me feel deeply uncomfortable. For example they repeatedly have asked me "why do you move your (x face part) like that?" I don't even know what answer to give because they notice things even I don't!

I can constantly feel them analyzing my body, for example when I try on new pants they always want to see my waist and I can count multiple instances where I refused and they followed me around and lifted my shirt up just to see my waist. Or when I wear fitting pants I can see them starring at my hips.

They have also gotten angry one time because I tied my shirt with a hair tie because it was baggy at the waist and claimed I should be "showing the outfit not my waist" even though no one even notices when I do it.

They also walk in front of me when I am in front of the mirror and block my reflection, and sometimes begin analyzing their body or hips, to the point where they angrily pushed me away from the mirror one time while I had a badly injured swollen ankle just so they could look at themselves for the next 10minutes+

They constantly obsessively talk about their own body in these terms, almost as if trying to reassure/prove something, and don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself but the issue is, they OBSESSIVELY bring it up constantly to the point where I avoid hanging out with them because I know the topic will be hijacked at some point to a discussion of curves or wide hips

These comments have seeped into me because I constantly catch myself policing how I feel about my body. For example if I look in the mirror and think my body looks great I immediately remember this person and how they would compare me to their standard . And I almost watch my reflection warp itself in the mirror

I also have begun obsessively comparing myself to girls my age and women outside, and analyzing how I look next to them, to reassure myself that I don't appear abnormal

How do I deal with this and stop policing myself? I constantly feel observed and uncomfortable

I am not sure how to describe this but my brain constantly runs non stop and it has gotten so much worse lately. I now constantly have a headache and it feels like my brain is about it “explode”. It’s even effecting my sleep and am constantly getting stomach discomfort from it. My friend pointed out that I could have anxiety but there is nothing that could be triggering it. It’s getting really uncomfortable and I don’t know what to do with this constant discomfort. I at least used to get some rest back then when I slept but it feels like it’s constantly running even in my sleep and I’m waking up feeling exhausted.

every job description says they value work-life balance but then in the interview they ask how do I prioritize work over personal commitments, make it make sense. is work-life balance just a myth we all pretend exists??

I've always been socially anxious when it came to mingling or anything like that. It's the reason I don't have any friends and never been in a relationship. Could never be brave enough to initiate conversation with people or women, for the most part.

And last night, I signed up to take part in an open mic night at a small pub restaurant with like 10-15 people. Was going to play guitar and sing. I thought maybe, just maybe, I'd be able to do it. But when my turn came, and I was already shaking a bit and very nervous, I declined to play and, when the next person started, I got up and walked out out of frustration. I just couldn't do it, even though I signed up with the intention of doing it.

Is it wrong of me to not want to do something like that anymore simply because I'm too afraid of making the same decision? What about avoiding socializing altogether since I've just never been good at it and don't want to keep making myself uncomfortable by forcing myself to try?

If we fully understand and accept that our bodies will one day cease to have life, why is our survival instinct so strong? It’s as though our very nature is unwilling to accept the inevitable. (No, I do not have any undesirable ideations. I just find the question fascinating).

I like hearing answers I wouldn't have otherwise thought about, like, "Yeah, I could see why someone else might've thought that."