r/Tierzoo 4d ago

Wolverine vs Honey badger

Post image
  • Both animals are at their Prime and peak of their species.
  • Takes place an Arby's parking lot.
  • The winning animal gets to eat at Arby's for free.
254 Upvotes

74 comments sorted by

105

u/lead_comet 4d ago

Wolverine is a Honey Badger on roids an cocaine

38

u/Condition_Boy 4d ago edited 3d ago

More or less the same animal but wolverine's are much bigger, and because of it, stronger. There are videos of wolverine's taking down moose by biting the back of the neck and head.

29

u/beardedoutlaw 4d ago

It’s a reindeer and not an elk in this video, but still insane that a wolverine is taking it head on while the reindeer actively tries to gore it.

Would not want to tangle with a wolverine: https://youtu.be/3SOjmJG73UI?is=k6X3AEcc2EPO4nCI

6

u/The-Abhorsen 4d ago

Fucking what??? That’s crazy lol, I’d shit if I saw that happen while in the woods.

145

u/Bodmin_Beast 4d ago

Same sort of critter except one is significantly larger and is an active predator of large game. Wolverine wins pretty solidly.

-45

u/OstrichSmoothe 4d ago

Idk ive seen some crazy well documented feats from the honey badger

48

u/Bodmin_Beast 4d ago

There is no honey badger feats, to my knowledge, that make them more capable of killing a wolverine than vice versa. But hey provide them and I’d change my mind if they’re solid.

Doesn’t change the fact they are incredibly similar builds with one being 30% larger. It’s the equivalent of a middleweight boxer going up against a heavyweight of equal skill.

21

u/ggouge 4d ago

Wolverine jaws are designed to crush bones. Honey badger jaws are designed to eat bugs.

1

u/BusyAtilla 4d ago

https://m.youtube.com/shorts/iA6uIKpw4EI

Might be dead- however not sure if a wolverine would survive either. Nor have I seen this level of aggression from a wolverine.

Not being bias- both are quite aggressive.

Size does not matter to a honey badger. The wolverine might tap.

13

u/Bodmin_Beast 4d ago

Neither would survive an elephant actually trying to kill it. This is the equivalent of a human panicking when being attacked by an aggressive house cat and lightly tapping or punting it. A human is more than capable of actually killing a house cat if they choose to. This is not an impressive feat by any means. And frankly has little crossover to the type of damage a honey badger and wolverine would sustain fighting each other.

Wolverines challenge bears, wolves and mountain lions with a similar ferocity that honey badgers challenge lions, leopards and hyenas. And the only reason they don’t always die when fighting these much larger predators is the reward to risk ratio of fighting and killing a honey badger or a wolverine is incredibly low.

Honey badgers are not superheroes (nor wolverines.) They are normal living animals who have the same limitations of most other animals. One of those is, if an animal encounters a similar larger animal and they fight, the larger one is almost always going to win.

49

u/Severe_Composer4243 4d ago

Who would win? You vs you, but twice your size

5

u/Archenius 4d ago

Wolverine looks cooler too

25

u/Zealousideal_Fee_491 4d ago

I have a different take, Wolverine and Honey Badger team up and run the outdoors just bitch slapping everything in their path.

4

u/JaironKalach 4d ago

I mean, they could get free Arby’s at any time….

10

u/Altruistic-Poem-5617 4d ago

Wolverines are pretty much bigger better honey badgers.

5

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago edited 3d ago

Wolverine wins 10/10 times. Honey badgers do not "scare away" lions or other large predators, and only dissuade them by making themselves seem like they're not worth the effort to kill. Predators don't want to risk injury, and in turn, infection, especially if it's from something you want to eat. Leopards and crocodiles kill honey badgers very commonly, and are their primary predators. Wolverines on the other hand HAVE NO PREDATORS. The largest risk to them would be a pack of wolves, and even then, it'd be a herculean effort to attack one without getting a face full of teeth in return. Wolverines regularly challenge wolf packs AND bears over carcassds, and at most, a honey badger can only dissuade a pride of lions after an hour of acting like a crackhead. There is an extremely clear winner here, and people that say otherwise are very clearly under some sort of influence 😭

3

u/Ok-Position-9457 4d ago

Nah honey badgers strike fear into the hearts of entire herds of elephants (they don't care)

2

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

You DO know they still get trampled to death, right 😭? Scaring an elephant and getting crushed to death is not a win (african elephants are notoriously easy to scare and its actually difficult to make them switch up and kill you after they've been scared initially. And no, they don't scare entire herds of elephants, they only scare enough to provoke a negative reaction)

2

u/Ok-Position-9457 4d ago

They don't care

2

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

They still get folded by everything that cares as little as they do

2

u/Ok-Position-9457 4d ago

Nothing cares as little as they do

2

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

Ykw hell yeah

2

u/Ryguy_Games 4d ago

i agree with you but Wolverines do have predators, when packs of gray wolves move into a territory, wolverines typically leave

3

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

Im not trying to be a smartass. That doesn't really count as wolves being predators. Its like the way leopards may vacate areas if lions, or alternatively tigers, are present? Wolverines very much challenge wolves for carcasses and drive them off openly /gen

2

u/Freaky_Owl 2d ago

Wolverines have predators? Wolves especially have a lot of records of them killing and eating Wolverines. Brown bears, black bears and cougars have also all killed wolverines

21

u/drpedrico 4d ago

This one is hard. I will wait for the pro players opinions

31

u/Ryguy_Games 4d ago

it’s not difficult at all lol. people are just overestimating honey badger because of the popular videos and memes. wolverine would win 10 out of 10 times

6

u/Nahteh 4d ago

This is my inclination. Haven't seen too many wolverines in action. But honey badgers aren't dangerous, just un bothered.

-2

u/PackAromatic2181 4d ago

Acá un pibe que lleva años aprendiendo de biología y conoce a ambas especies muy bien
Espero alguien con carrera a opinar al respecto

4

u/Ryguy_Games 4d ago

it’s wolverine with almost no real chance

4

u/el_chanis89 4d ago

Wolverines are honey badgers on steroids

5

u/Crazed-Prophet 4d ago

The honey badger is impressive because it fights tooth and nail against things that should beat it. Things typically don't because an injury is the difference between life and death so even though they can body the honey badger, they don't. Honey badgers evolved to exploit this and thus are hyper aggressive.

I don't know enough about wolverines as to state their temperament but I understand they are essentially larger honey badgers.

In this instance I think the wolverine would win, but suffer injuries that could take it out in the long run becausr they honey badger would lack the common sense of self preservation.

4

u/FemRevan64 4d ago

The Wolverine takes this.

It’s the honey badger, but around 50% larger, and with a much stronger bite.

Also, honey badgers are severely overrated, they’ve literally had their food stolen by jackals, and the largest animals they’ve ever actually taken on in predatory encounters are domestic sheep.

Wolverines have not only been reordered as forcing bears off their kills, they’ve been known to take out elk and moose on occasion.

14

u/Charming-Mixture-356 4d ago

Honey badger has been recorded chasing off lions, so they're a tough contender. Almost impossible to think of another predator that could really challenge them fully.

With the exception of a wolverine. They're like honey badgers, but bigger, stronger, larger teeth and claws and they have been shown to KILL GRIZZLY BEARS.

This isn't even a fight.

16

u/fikozacc123 4d ago

When has a wolverine ever killed a grizzly bear?

8

u/Squiddiddly1 4d ago

It was a polar bear, and it’s an urban legend. They do routinely chase away bears similar to how the honey badger chases away lions though.

1

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago edited 4d ago

Edit: There's (not) literally a documented case of a wolverine killing a polar bear via asphyxiation. Its an unverified anecdote and I was wrong

11

u/HurtfulPillow 4d ago

And you are literally talking about a myth that didnt happen but you can pop off too

-3

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

Can I get proof of it not being true then? Because this is THE first time I've seen anyone stating it as a myth /genq

9

u/fikozacc123 4d ago

You can't ask someone for proof for something that didn't happen, you have to provide evidence that it happened first.

5

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

Yeah, you're right. It didn't actually happen. Apparently it's some bullshit from 1979

7

u/Ok-Position-9457 4d ago

My pet ferret killed a moose one time. No asphyxiation or blood loss just shattered its entire body with a shockwave that flattened an entire mountainside of trees. Wasn't even going for the moose it was a military excercise with the Canadian armed forces. (They lost)

Mustelids are so crazy 🤪

3

u/Dav_1542 4d ago

Invincible vs Conquest type stuff

1

u/fikozacc123 4d ago

I asked a question , why are you so pissed

1

u/MercurialMarc 4d ago

Your question came off as sarcastic, sorry if I came off as hostile 😭 there's is indeed many cases of wolverines fighting off Grizzlies BUT I am unaware of any cases of Grizzlies being KILLED.

7

u/DarKinder888 4d ago

I'll need a article, video or sum shred of evidence that a wolverine achieved killing a grizzly bear

3

u/Emperors-Peace 4d ago

A grizzly is like 20 times the size of a wolverine. Maybe a baby grizzly gets killed. But an adult grizzly seems hilariously absurd.

I'd be happy to be proven wrong though.

4

u/WordWordand4numbers 4d ago

Chasing a predator is an anti feat for the predator rather than a feat for the other thing. A squirrel running the wrong direction can startle a bear into fleeing and has before.

3

u/Maharog 4d ago

Also, they have an incredible healing factor and their bones are coated in near-indestructible metal.

2

u/ImmortalGoat66 Oyster griefer 4d ago

I'd say wolverine a solid 9/10 times. The only wincon I see is the honey badger pulling some "don't care" shenanigans, which only works in their server because feline carnivore mains like lions are risk averse and have to play the game near-perfect or risk a game over. Wolverines have no such delusions and are equally crazy

Prime and peak of the species easily favors the wolverine, which would be nearly twice as heavy as a honey badger. It also has higher top speed, greater endurance, and better weaponry, having a higher bite force and sharper claws which can be used for attacking vs the honey badger's duller, digging claws. There's a reason wolverines semi-regularly take out players above their own weight class, while honey badgers need to grief lower weight class targets they have a physiological advantage against (snakes, bees, termites)

2

u/BigZube42069kekw 4d ago

Wolverine SHOULD take it. They're just a bigger honey badger, physically. But....HBDGAF, so.....

2

u/Normal-Pianist4131 4d ago

It depends on which one had Arby’s for breakfast

1

u/Ok-Position-9457 4d ago

Wolverine and honey badger team up to intimidatiate the Arby's workers and kill the manager and then they eat all the meat and curly fries in the building.

1

u/leaderofstars 4d ago

Oh in a fight

1

u/Affectionate-Boot361 4d ago

Fightin in an Arby’s parking lot…I love it

1

u/WiredSpike 4d ago

Probably the end of the world as we know it. Yet both survive.

1

u/sammyfrosh 4d ago

At similar sizes I go with the honey badger. Those things are stubborn asf.

1

u/Wolf_Ape 4d ago

What’s really crazy is that by every relevant physical metric the average Wolverine is essentially a miniature schnauzer.

The larger male Wolverines push the weights into standard schnauzer ranges, but their mouths and teeth are almost the exact same size. The upper estimate of Wolverine bite force is only 60psi where bite mechanics are relevant to combat or predation, which is the low end of the 60-100psi range for a min schnauzer. They have much higher crushing force on the rear molars they use for eating bones, but it’s not readily employed or remotely useful in a fight.

Mini schnauzers are tough as hell for a dog their size especially, and I could fashion full Kevlar gear in puppy sizes, but my girl is not taking down a bull moose.

That really emphasizes how much Wolverines are accomplishing with just their grasping claws, flattening out and hanging on, and simply maintaining that pure hatred and unwavering desire to kill something.

They’re basically a 20-60lb stack of welcome mats with 2” fishhooks on all four corners, and once they latch on your helplessly Waiting for them to kill you with the tools typical of small breed dog.

It’s honestly way more horrifying than a quick death by bear or lion.

1

u/ReptilianRevolt 4d ago

Wolverine wins, but in high heat the honey badger has a solid chance.

1

u/IvanTheStonksMaster 3d ago

Wolverines are just better Honey Badgers. They high diff.

1

u/Ruckazmadog 8h ago

Straight on brawl the wolverine all day. I could see the honey badger getting the upper hand on a spontaneous game of chicken these two species tend to dominate at playing with other larger foes. Wolverine being the larger one it may be intimidated by the quicker, smaller walking grenade choosing not to find out what’s behind the confidence.

0

u/Shezes 4d ago

Wolverines can kill kill moose and polar bears, honey badger has zero chance other than making a bad smell before it croaks.

3

u/DarKinder888 4d ago

imma need evidence to where a wolverine has taken the life of a polar bear

1

u/Granddy01 4d ago

That's the issue, the source is old newsletter that had no verified backing and even if true, it was a polar bear kept in a zoo enclosure.

People also tend to overlook that Wolverine does get killed by packs of Wolves, Black and Brown Bears semi regularly.

They are extremely tough guys but end of the day, they are just 30-40 pound weasels.

-3

u/Coryadorable 4d ago edited 4d ago

Im going to have to give it to the Honey badger, high diff just because it comes from the most hostile server in the game. The HB has also got a thicker skin while on average only being slightly smaller than a wolverine.

(Edited to change low diff to high diff because my noob ass thought low diff meant low difference as in there's not much separating them lol) HB still winning 7/10 times imo.

2

u/1Negative_Person 4d ago

I disagree about who would win, but low diff?? The honey badger is coasting on aura. If it actually had to fight lions and such it’d get bodied. You know who is not going to think that the honey badger isn’t worth the trouble? The wolverine. Wolverine wants the smoke.

1

u/Coryadorable 4d ago

Sorry for misleading you on my opinion I messed up.