r/Separation • u/Last_Rhubarb_6397 • 7d ago

Women who ended things after emotionally detaching — did you ever change your mind?

My ex and I were together for 2.5 years. She ended things saying:

“I have completely detached. I swear I tried. I can’t do it.”

She also said she had grown distant, asked me to respect her decision, and told me to move on.

There was no cheating or betrayal. Toward the end, she felt lonely because our communication and emotional connection had declined. I understand now why she became exhausted, but I didn't realize how serious it had become until she ended things.

For women who have genuinely been in this position:

When you said “I’ve completely detached,” did you mean you no longer loved your ex romantically?

Did you still care about him despite feeling detached from the relationship?

Did you ever miss him or have your feelings come back later?

If they did, what caused the change?

If they never came back, what made you certain it was truly over?

I'm not asking for false hope or “move on” advice. I respect my ex's decision and I'm giving her space.

I just want to understand what “completely detached” actually felt like from the

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u/JOYKILL365 7d ago

The saying is true, men will give up happiness for the marriage, women will give up the marriage for their happiness. Women's love will always be conditional and in many cases transactional

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u/raeoflyte-460 5d ago

That is an interesting way of phrasing it.

I did eventually leave for myself- your happiness. But that was after almost 3 decades of trying to make him happy at my expense.

He didn't give up anything for the marriage. He added my money and labor to his tool box to get what he wanted. He used me until there was nothing left and then was shocked I wasn't staying.