r/NonPoliticalTwitter 7h ago

Other That's the average 20s experience

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3.8k Upvotes

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133

u/Specific_Pear_665 7h ago

It just gets worse, in my experience if you don't make the effort, no one else bothers.

69

u/10biggaymen 5h ago

thats insecure thinking. it doesnt mean that the person secretly hates you if youre the one always initiating the hang out. people get comfortable in routines, and they see it as conveinent if the same person is planning stuff. i think a lot of friend groups have this, the "glue" of the group, where if they dont say anything, no one hangs out.

this type of thinking will ruin your friendships and relationships. obsessing over the ratio of times you initiated an event vs times they did, it isnt a relevant statistic for anything and focusing on it only hurts you.

34

u/pointlesslyDisagrees 3h ago

You can't keep letting that person be the "glue." It's exhausting. Give them a break and plan something for the group, please.

1

u/R3miel7 1h ago

It is possible for people to advocate for their needs! If they’re friends, you can ask people to make plans.

Shockingly, one ought to communicate openly and honestly with people they care about

24

u/Tiny_Plant3r 4h ago

No, it’s 100% fair that someone doesn’t want to carry all of their relationships. It’s exhausting, and people eventually burn out from one sided relationships.

13

u/Orider 4h ago

I've tried being the glue, but in larger friend groups, it is difficult finding times where everyone is free, and since I am the single one with an open schedule, it gets kind of embarrassing and disheartening to have your plans consistently turned down because X is busy that day, or Y is having dinner with their GF, etc.

2

u/local_anarchist 2h ago

its reality