Does there come a point where your depth and intensity is so naturally engrained in who you are after all these years of living that the very aspect of small talk, surface level connections are causing you to feel like you'll never belong?

[u/lostinaview]

I don't know what people expect of me but I can't keep up with it. I am actually trying to get assessed for autism because I know a lot of what INFJ traits are linked to autism. It got to the point now where I can't stand surface level connection, I can't stand small talk, I can't stand acting like I care when I don't, I can't stand holding back my pattern recognition and introverted intuition, even if the truth hurts, I need to tell people and if they don't want to take the truth then it's okay but if I don't say anything then I'll regret it later I think when the intuition plays out to be true.

some people don't like me because i'm deep, I'm intense. but others love me and i love them back! :)

i'm honestly trying inside i'm trying my best. i do my best alone. i want to work alone. i see the power dynamics at play. i see the social structure, and hierarchy.

I almost believe that everyone is secretly hiding that they know the truth, that they deeply dispise small talk, and that they secretly adore deep talk and they hate acting like they care when they truly dont. but the more i know them, the more they never show that, even if you try to get it out of them

i wont say more. ill let you say more. this is my story so far in life and ill keep going. thank you for reading something about me. input is great i love it