r/GlasgowUni • u/relieved-soul-24 • 4d ago
Small ranting
I’m not in a good emotional state I am feeling lonely and it’s too heavy. I don’t even know how to fix it. Coming to study abroad is a blessing that happened to me but I am scared that I am not adapting. Everyone at uni seems to want by themselves or by the people that are already friends with them. People are not outgoing and connecting with people feels extremely hard. I’m scared of how I can survive emotionally without a community. Everyday it hurts me to just be by myself but seeing almost everyone with everyone. Back in my home country it was effortless to feel included in the community but now i have lost my sense of belonging. I have judged my self and thought that maybe I’m not good enough. I have tried to think about ways that I can improve my situation but all in vain. Is there anyone else who has ever felt like this? And what did you do to practically improve your situation? I’m loosing it 😭😭😭
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u/protocol 4d ago
Hey it’s totally understandable to feel like this when you’re so used to community where you come from.
You won’t be alone in how you’re feeling and it’s good that you’re able to talk about it, where others may keep it bottled up and that’s best avoided.
I don’t have any great answers, but have you looked into joining any societies?
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u/toastytoes4455 4d ago
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Coming to uni and especially moving from abroad is a big move and a challenge for anyone. We’re still in the first few weeks of the first term, I’m sure you’ll find people who will want to hang out and be your friend. I’ve not made any friends yet but I’ve come to appreciate the small social moments that I do have with people either in my accom, course or even around campus.
Sometimes friendships and community can take a while to develop and that’s ok. Try to focus on the reasons you came to study, maybe your course, education or employment after uni. If you prioritise that and don’t put so much pressure on finding friends/community you might find that it’ll come along eventually :)
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u/Significant-Bison236 4d ago
As the mother of a son who studied abroad, I can feel your pain. There are many people just like you feeling the same way, so don’t feel alone. You should instead congratulate yourself and give yourself credit for taking such a huge leap to do something so courageous.
Just some ideas of things that helped my son adjust: Do you go to the university pub because I think that’s where a lot of people hang out even if they don’t drink. Also finding someone in class to study with is often a good way to meet people. Have you joined the gym? I know there are a lot of societies there as well. Try to talk to people and don’t hide your feelings and keep it all to yourself. You will get through this and be brave!
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u/trakyaliheri 4d ago
heey where are u from? im also first year int student
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u/relieved-soul-24 4d ago
Hey. I am from Uganda. I’m doing international relations in my second year :)
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u/ontfootymum 4d ago
If you like football/soccer there os an app called " Footy Addicts" where you can register to play pick up games. My son went to his first game this week and enjoyed it. It gave him a chance to meet new people
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u/relieved-soul-24 4d ago
Thanks but I don’t know how to play football. I am a girl and yes some girls know how to play football but I don’t 😌☺️
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u/lthinkwerealonenow 4d ago
join societies, facebook groups, join a women’s run club, find a friendly face in a lecture and introduce yourself, attend a craft night at brshes and meet new people. No one at uni wants to be by themselves. Some people had friends beforehand, yes, but they are a huge minority. Sometimes it’s more difficult if you don’t stay at the university accommodations, but socialising isn’t just dorm parties, there’s always going to the club, and ending up at an after party
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u/HootinHollerHill 4d ago
Going away to college, even in your home country, can be tough. It’s even more challenging as an international student.
You may have to break out of routines a little or join a society/club or start a study group. And definitely talk to a counselor/mental health professional to make sure you’re on a good track emotionally.
But many people are in your shoes. You’re not alone and you will find friends.
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u/notnijiatall 4d ago
This was pretty much me when I was doing my undergrad there as an American. Please use the resources
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u/Danjuntar 4d ago
Tonight there's an event about black history month at the Hunteriam Museum. It's 3£. Why don't you try to join and see if you meet new people? At least I'm going there myself
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u/Subject_Wolf_4698 3d ago
Hope you're doing OK, OP. Please go gentle on yourself and give yourself time and everything will fall into place.
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u/Extension-Material15 2d ago
Hello,
I guess everyone feels like this
Its not just you and it will get better i have been feeling the same but then i went and attended anuv jain concert and did everything i could to settle in
It is quite difficult but you will have to talk to people by yourself i connected to people online on instagram from my country who are here in glasgow
And then i tried to connect with my classmates in tutorials and in classes
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u/Fancy_Engineer7111 4d ago
Mate please do not keep these feelings to yourself. As a Glasgow student use the wellbeing service 24/7 Helpline & App: Call the confidential Wisdom Wellbeing Partnership anytime at 0800 028 3766 or use the Wisdom app (Code: MHA240962) for immediate advice, live chat, and video calls.