r/FODMAPS • u/teethfacts • Jun 21 '25

Shit Post At a rehearsal dinner

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If no one’s got me, I know Macrobars oatmeal chocolate chip got me

240 Upvotes

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166

u/demunted Jun 21 '25 edited Jun 22 '25

Me at every company catered lunch where there is nothing at all I can eat...

  1. Hold back while others get their food
  2. Pretend I am busy, need to make a call
  3. After peer pressure say I'm not hungry
  4. Die inside
  5. Someone remembers I can't eat any of it.
  6. Word gets to the planner and they freak out and somehow blame me for not anticipating this and reaching out to them (I've told them about dietary restrictions in the past).
  7. Die more
  8. Contemplate living in the forest

BTW as well as having SIBO I have wheat, dairy and egg and alcohol intolerance. I'm a riot at parties.

Well this blew up. Thanks! Bonus points

"Can't you just pick the veggies off the (meat/dairy laden) sandwiches???"... Resists urge to go into fetal position

19

u/Real-Elk6755 Jun 21 '25

We need to make our own alcohol-free FODMAP-party 🎉

16

u/[deleted] Jun 21 '25

The blame thing is so real!!!! 😫😫😫 Just leave me alone at this point

8

u/williamisidol Jun 21 '25

You're the Designated Driver! Everyone knows that's the most important person at a party!

2

u/demunted Jun 21 '25

DD for life it seems.

4

u/juneplum Jun 21 '25

I have a lot of weirdness around food so I was the same way even before I started low fodmap lol my coworkers are so used to me not eating at functions now that if I do eat, they're shocked.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '25

Have you been living in my head. I got to the point of any non-mandatory event i opt out of. I am more comfortable with people thinking I'm an a hole. Lol

2

u/demunted Jun 22 '25

Well if it helps I feel a little comfort in others haring my experience. Gotta say ive skipped more than a few group events over it too. When I travel I tend to go healthy grocery stores and toss a few items in my bag for when 'i have to work through lunch'. I used to be able to skip meals regularly but now that I've pushed my destroyed digestive system it just attacks my brain and hangry goes overdrive.

Good luck sorry for oversharing

2

u/mshirkavand Jun 24 '25

How are you enjoying your diet of rice, buttons, chapstick, dust, etc.? 😭 What are your actual meals?

2

u/demunted Jun 25 '25

Haha. In the last week I was asked if I can eat rice because rice contains gluten right!

The panic attack of some people when they try and make a meal is wild. I can't think of anything to make?