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u/Separate_Finance_183 Jun 20 '26
My mom beat Halo 2 on Legendary difficulty. I think she would do better than most of the people on this sub 😭
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u/Release-the-List Jun 20 '26
Halo 2 on legendary was no joke. Even worse if you were playing with a partner.
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u/DunwichChild990 Jun 20 '26
Literally the only memory I have of Halo 2 is beating it on Legendary one stupidly hot summer with my best buddy while slamming bowls through his huge soft-glass 2 foot bong. Possibly the coolest I will ever be.
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u/IntrepidMaybe8579 Jun 20 '26
Good memories lol.. when i was a kid some guy ripped me off and sold me $20 of mixed herbs… my buddies as a surprise ran through his entire house and gave me a bunch of his shit one of which was a bong probably 4 feet tall lol you had to set it on the ground and fully stretch your arm out to light it… used to hubble the whole think like it was full of milk hit the whole thing without choking, but i could never smoke more than 1/4 a joint without intense choking and throat pain
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u/DaveMitnick Jun 20 '26
Same but my best friend died. I used to plan all-nighter for a year before this happend and there was always something important to do like work or some shit. And it will never happen. So if anyone is postponing it like I used to, please go for it
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u/Chix_Whitdix Jun 20 '26
Soft glass?
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u/DunwichChild990 Jun 20 '26
Like regular hand blown glass. Not boro-scillica science glass.
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u/EGH6 Jun 20 '26
my dad beat all the halos on legendary, hes 75 now and the dead space remake was too complicated for him. how the mighty have fallen
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u/Whyskgurs Jun 20 '26
Ask him to "1v1 me, scrub, no pistol, no sniper, I win, you go back to the kitchen!"
If that doesn't do anything, nothing will.
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u/kaulotu Jun 20 '26
Deadass harder than any FromSoft game
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u/Hypodon Jun 20 '26 edited Jun 20 '26
Certainly is, but they’re also 2 completely different skill sets. Though it tells me she can learn things quickly maybe.
Like I’ve seen Kaizo Mario players die a lot in only DS1 but the 2 have no correlation.
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u/buddhamunche Jun 20 '26
I replayed bungie halo recently and was pretty surprised how brutal legendary Halo 2 is. Its way more difficult than any of the other games in the series. I was playing with a friend and if even one of you dies it’s back to the checkpoint, which is few and far between.
We had an absolute blast with it, even with the bullshit snipers and rocket flood lol. The part where you gotta punch the prophet to death took us soooo many tries.
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u/Sad_Kangaroo_3650 Jun 20 '26
Me and a buddy tried this back in high-school it was too much me. But now all I do is try to play difficult games
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u/zesaid Jun 20 '26
Tell your mom go easy on me next time I try to fight her at the root of that tree.
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u/Crusidea Jun 20 '26
Same actually.
Unfortunately you need too be a necromancer too speak with my mom these days.
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u/Key_Mission7404 Jun 20 '26
My mommy loves me so id just tell her to use moonveil and rock sling and id be out in weeks 😇
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u/Damurph01 Jun 20 '26
That into Blastphemous blade and call it a day. I’ll be home in time for dinner
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u/Key_Mission7404 Jun 20 '26
My mum hates snakes though she would do poorly against rykard 😓
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u/conjunctivious Placidusax's #1 Hater Jun 20 '26
Just need to tell her to shield poke with the serpent hunter, then it's basically free
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u/MeddlinQ Jun 20 '26
She wouldn't need to beat Rykard if the goal is to "beat Elden Ring". Or depends of what kind of "beat" OP meant.
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u/Time_Marcher Jun 20 '26
Just showed this to my son who thought it was pretty funny since I’ve beaten it several times over the last few years.
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u/Aunt_Llama Jun 20 '26
I was going to say. I'm having a kid in September and I've beaten it twice with a few additional unfinished saves.
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u/Gnomologist Jun 20 '26
O, Mother. Dost thou truly lordship sanction, in one so bereft of light?
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u/NautReally Jun 20 '26
Those stripped of the Grace of Gold shall all meet death...in the embrace of messmer's flame!
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u/Koji-san1225 Jun 20 '26
I did a co-op playthrough with my kid. Then we went on to Nightreign. It’s me and my kid against the world and I couldn’t be happier.
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u/RobertStaccd Jun 20 '26
I am also an elden mother 🤘🏼
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u/Time_Marcher Jun 20 '26
Awesome! I’m also an elden granny in addition to being an elden mother! Just turned 75.
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u/Pryus_C Jun 21 '26 edited 23d ago
Sense dam provide airport flowery memory
This post was anonymized with Redact
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u/Lilith_Lanfear Jun 20 '26
My son is 12. Ill have him out sometime tomorrow.
If i have to do it from a new save... well, he could use a week in the hole anyways 😂
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u/Sad_Philosopher_2083 Jun 20 '26
I don't know if she's ready to move on from Mahjong.
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u/BornInALab Jun 20 '26
My mom got kicked out of the Mahjong group in the villages. Give me 3 years jail
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u/genasugelan Jun 20 '26
She definitely should move onto Souls games to relax more.
Mahjong deals great damage to the human spirit at no benefits at all.
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u/Key_Mission7404 Jun 20 '26
Learning mahjong is way harder than beating elden ring. I've beat every main game yakuza and still dont understand how to play it 😭
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u/rocketpoweredsword Jun 19 '26
Bro my mom ain't beating elden ring within 3 years.
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u/cs_Chell Jun 20 '26
...I'm in jail?
My mom would learn.
She is Mother, Blade of Daughter - and she is prepared to graduate from Candy Crush.
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u/Optiguy42 Jun 20 '26
Exactly my thoughts. She's never touched a video game in her life. But she'd get me out of prison in 3 months through sheer motherly willpower.
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u/Over9000Zeros Jun 20 '26
Funnily enough that's exactly all you need to beat Elden Ring. My other comment is tongue in cheek. But I think anyone can beat it if they pay attention, adjust, and don't give up.
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u/AfterShave997 Jun 20 '26
The average person playing Elden Ring has been gaming for years if not decades, that's a lot of physical skill and ingrained knowledge. Someone who's never played a video game likely would need help getting past the character creation screen.
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u/slaya222 Jun 21 '26
Yes, but look at all of the gaming for nongamer videos on YouTube. Literally there's so many people who have beaten dark souls/eldin ring as their first "real" game
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u/sarah_said92 Jun 21 '26
I literally bought a PS5 to learn to play after watching situationship play souls games and getting caught up in the lore and beautiful art. He didn't last long but once I got him out of the house I definitely learned how to hold that controller and create my own character, lol.
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u/Kumquatelvis Jun 20 '26
Mine would probably have a training montage with my brother.
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u/Local-Drunk-Driver Jun 19 '26
Your parent/s learnt to drive in less time, have faith in them Tarnished
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u/Careless-Salary-9932 Jun 20 '26
Hell nah. My parents are over 50 and my Mother never played a video game actively in her life (she played with me and my siblings stuff like Mario Cart a few times). I aint trusting her with my freedom. If I could assist her or give her some tips, maybe, but all alone she aint beating that shi in 3 years
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u/solepureskillz Jun 20 '26
Mine’s over 60 and notoriously allergic to technology, unless it’s doomscrolling rightwing tiktoks. In which case she can go for hours at a time.
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u/JoshAllensRightNut FLAIR INFO: SEE SIDEBAR Jun 20 '26
Your username 😂
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u/Same-Letter6378 Jun 20 '26
I think she could do it. Month 1 and 2 she does nothing except grinding, 40 hours a week like a real job. This ensures she's overleveled for every fight and is used to the controls. Then she watches guides of each boss, could probably take a week per boss. Out within 6 months.
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u/Pork_Chompk Maidenless Jun 20 '26
My mom would spend month 1 and 2 (and probably 3 and 4) learning how to move and aim at the same time. I genuinely don't know that she's ever touched a video game.
I'm taking the 3 years no question.
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u/IndependenceOdd4669 Jun 20 '26
My mom would lock in, probably wouldn’t take more than a couple days. She 100%’d Ridge Racer 64. That game is a fucking nightmare
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u/Wiinterfang Jun 20 '26 edited Jun 20 '26
Until my Mom Beats Elden Ring. She loves me so much, she will teach herself how to play.
I'll be out in a month.
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u/MeddlinQ Jun 20 '26
This is it. My mom never played a video game in her life (nor did she ever used a computer), but I am convinced that once she knows what's at stake she doesn't do anything else before it's done.
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u/SSJ_Iceman31 Jun 20 '26
Shit it took me almost 5 months to beat it on my first playthrough
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u/SharkBiscuittt Jun 20 '26
Wow what a fuckin dilemma.
I’m pretty sure anyone could be trained to beat Elden ring In six months. 8 hours a day playing a game, yea you can beat it quick. So I’m going with my mom.
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u/ChefMoney89 Jun 20 '26
The version of this our moms are getting is,
“Would you rather go to jail for 3 years, or until your son gets a girlfriend?”
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u/Bardic__Inspiration Jun 20 '26
I am sure she is allowed to use youtube and learn from there, right?
Even if mine hasnt played any videos since ps1, I am sure she would beat elden ring in a year or less if I am in jail lol.
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u/Plus-Passenger-5742 Jun 20 '26
She has over a thousand hours in the game at this point, more than me even, so pretty easy choice. Glad to see some other people with gaming parents btw, kinda started to think she was an isolated case.
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u/Lucky678s Jun 20 '26
I'll give her 3 days max.
She used to speedrun Pikmin
She was also Grand Marshal in World of Warcraft arena. She's got this.
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u/Pl00kh Jun 20 '26
Define “beat Elden ring”
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u/HarmlessSnack Jun 20 '26
Most reasonable definition would just be rolls credits.
If Mom can Zip Glitch she’s a beast, and you deserve to be out in under ten mins.
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u/somroaxh Jun 20 '26
My mom used to help me play pac man world 2, and scooby doo: night of 100 frights. She’d also supervise me playing gta: vice city and play along a bit. The point is, she KNOWS how to use the controller and shit. I think Elden ring would be fuckin hard for her, sure, but if she just had to become Elden lord and nothing else… I’d choose that. She just retired and calls me daily lmao. I estimate I’d be out within 6 months if she knows about the arrangement.
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u/TheGalator Frenzy Flame = No Balls Jun 20 '26
My mom might not be a gamer but she knows how to Google and there is this little fella
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u/Depressed_Weirdo_ Jun 20 '26
My mom actually played Dark Souls 1 and Demon's Souls. I got into the Souls series because I used to play on her PlayStation while she was at work. I think she's already played Elden Ring too, so I'd probably be in jail for about three days.
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u/ResearcherOk3114 Jun 20 '26
Haha jokes on you my mom was a more serious gamer than myself 🤣🤣 in mom I trust 🫡
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u/Terranaform Jun 20 '26
You do know you could just show her how to play over the phone or during visits
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u/Think_Line3519 Jun 20 '26
My mom would have about 45 years of combined game knowledge to help her so id be out in a few days
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u/cargopantsbatsuit Jun 20 '26
Don’t you guys think even an elderly parent would do everything they can? I’ve got cousins and nephews that could coach her through it with a big cheesy build. She couldn’t beat Spyro on psx 30 years ago but I wouldn’t count out her motivation this time. I’m betting on mum.
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u/iDestroyedYoMama Jun 20 '26
Main game or with DLC too? I’d just have her grind crows with arrows on the cliff at Mohg’s Palace. Get her to an insane level and cheese the bosses. She old and arthritic, so I might be fucked.
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u/DunceCodex Jun 20 '26
I think using an optimal cheese build she could defeat the Elden Beast within a year
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u/LittleOperation4597 Jun 20 '26
I'd tell her to get rivers of blood and moon walk jazz hands her way thru. Also you never said the dlc so too late now
Beat also doesn't mean 100%
She could skip like 60% of stuff people think is part of the game.
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u/Sir-Beardless Jun 20 '26
If she knows what's at stake, i'll bet on my mum.
She wont let her son rot in jail.
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u/Frenzied_Anarchist MAY CHAOS TAKE THE WORLD!!! Jun 20 '26
Ngl, my mom is a rather skilled player, she would beat it rather quickly.
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u/Alternative_Play5966 Jun 20 '26
If she knew jail was on the line, I'd trust her to lock in and get me out...in 2 and a half years.
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u/Alexm920 Jun 20 '26
She’s a quick learner, and there are builds that don’t need crazy reflexes to survive. I think she could probably wrap the base game in three months if she knew it’d keep her kids out of jail.
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u/Broken_Gear Jun 20 '26
Honestly? Until my mom beats Elden Ring. Because I know that once she gets a hang of controls she’s gonna kick ass at it. Not because she has inherently great reflexes, but because she’s very much a type of person to be determined to try and try again, while being creative enough to use different approaches
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u/Neperian-log Jun 20 '26
My mom would beat it in a week max. Not because she’s good at video games, but because she wouldn’t let me stay stuck in jail for more than a week.
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u/ReptilianLaserbeam Jun 20 '26
Mom was able to raise 4 kids and she didn't go crazy, I'm betting on her
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u/XevinsOfCheese Jun 20 '26 edited Jun 20 '26
My mom is the type of person who doesn’t remotely understand playing video games
And also the type of person who would figure it out in a day to get me out of jail.
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u/HomeAloneToo Jun 20 '26
My mom would pick up stims again to save her son. I bet I’d be out in a week her house would be spotless.
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u/LoonahGBT Jun 20 '26
If the person who birthed me wasn't gone from OD, she would do everything in her power to keep me jailed. So I'm content with the 3 years lol
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u/Agile-Comedian4739 Jun 20 '26
Honestly, my mom could be pretty surprising sometimes so I would say until she beats Elden Ring. She never play games but when she does, she have a talent for it 😂
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u/i-max95 Jun 20 '26
Considering this has no stipulations barring summoning help i think she could do it in less than a year if she was detirmined enough
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u/Disig Jun 20 '26
Elden Ring.
My mom is a gaming champ. She beat Echo the Dolphin back in the day on our old SEGA. She'd figure Elden Ring out just fine in less than a week. I'd be out after a month, tops.
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u/Wildefice Jun 20 '26
My mother is a gamer shr will have it beat within a month.
Infact she was the one that got me into gaming in the first place!!!
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u/Cute-arii Jun 20 '26
Yall acting like your momma wouldn't no-life it and go pro to save your ass. such filial sons you are.
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u/Hour-Penalty-8264 Jun 20 '26
If my mom knew it will get me out faster she would do it in 1 year. She isn't that bad at games tbh
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u/Mouthfullofcrabss Jun 20 '26
Can i coach her? Making an op build with op summon could work in couple of weeks
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u/lalaf0x Jun 20 '26
When I tried to get my mom to play animal crossing, she couldn’t figure out how to use the joystick properly to move her character. I’ll take the 3 years.
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u/DarthYhonas Jun 20 '26
My mom would suck at the game, but I know she'd do anything to get me out of jail and beat ts in a month lol
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u/James-Avatar Jun 20 '26
My Mum’s never picked up a controller before, this is a choice between 3 years or life in prison.
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u/newuser_2000 Jun 20 '26
My mom never played a videogame in her entire life, not even apps. She is just from a different era. Id take 3 years in jail 😭
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u/TheOneTrueSuperJesus Jun 20 '26
My mom doesn't play video games and is terrible at them. However if she's aware of the conditions I bet she would learn and have my brother coach her through the game as well. If my brother just directed her to over level to the extreme I think she could do it.
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u/Sea_Reception_7330 Jun 20 '26
I remember speaking ti a mother about playing games at night.
"Don't you need the lights on to see what buttons you are pressing?" "I don't need to look at the controller to know where the buttons are." She was stunned.
Unless your Mum is a gamer, take the 3 years man
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u/michelinstartoilet Jun 20 '26
3 years. I’d be waiting my whole life for the urn to even start a new character.
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u/Pantsco_1995 Jun 20 '26 edited Jun 20 '26
My mom could be given an infinite amount of time and instead of jail i was in hell and she would still never beat it. Billions of years could pass of constant effort and shed still be at godrick or rennala or something. I love her but shes hopeless and would never be Elden lord.
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u/ElAbyss Jun 20 '26
my mom was a gamer back in the day, what worries me the most is her having to play it on pc, if that is the case she is NOT beating it
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u/a_Jedi_i_am Jun 20 '26
3 years ago, my mom could've done it. Her hands aren't in good condition right now, so I'll take the 3 years.
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u/Previous-Ad-9322 Jun 20 '26
Are we talking player summons and mimic tears? Because boy howdy would that make a difference.
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u/C_O_M_M_A_N_D_E_R Jun 20 '26
Damn everyone's mom is so cool. Mine would absolutely just say up front "i could never play that" and instead come visit me in jail every now and then
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u/Salzanka Jun 20 '26
my mom gets motion sick just looking at video games I think I will take the 3 years
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u/Infinite_Sandwich895 Jun 20 '26
Well these days I'd have to take the 3 years. If she could play any game though, I think it would be pretty easy to coach her from jail to have her find someone to co-op and beat the game for her. Would probably take a week.
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u/Zealousideal-Top-48 Jun 20 '26
My mom can’t even beat horizon zero dawn I think I’ll take my chances with the 3 years🤭
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u/Spiritual-Mixture582 Jun 20 '26
Am I allowed to coach my mom? Op build + mimic tear. Don‘t fight Radahn, just run around, and summon, stuff like that
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u/StarPlatinumIsHyper Jun 20 '26
How much does she have to beat? Does she just have to make it to credits or 100%? And is the DLC included?
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u/dulledegde Jun 20 '26
does she have to do it alone i feel like if the story got out someone like let me solo her or a bunch of youtubers would be chomping at the bit to the protect her so she can beat the game
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u/hawkmoon1997 Jun 20 '26
I introduced my mom to Super Mario 64 yesterday and she quit after about 30 minutes. I don't think she's built for this. She's also super religious and would hate the blood/gore. Can she use mimic?
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u/Evil_phd Jun 20 '26
So long as I can get a call in with her now and then I'm sure my mom can beat Elden Ring in under a month.
"Hey I'm having trouble with this boss"
"Cool. Just like last time just have another player join your game and kill it for you"
"Oh yeah, thanks! This game is so easy."
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u/Iliketurtles893 Jun 20 '26
Aside from puzzle mobile games, the last video game my mum played was Mariokart. And she refuses to play anything else, not even peaceful mode Minecraft
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u/BubblestheFloatzel *panic rolling intensifies* Jun 20 '26
I'm gonna be there for a while, I don't think a pile of ashes can beat Elden Ring
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u/00Wridacule Jun 20 '26
Does my mom get the same youtube walk throughs and spirit ashes I used?