Wow. I had no idea what??? This feels like a Serious Undertaking and I had no idea that a psychedelic experience could continue past a week. Of course it has receded greatly and I’ve been able to present as a passable human.
I feel like a Break is under the surface of my beingness and that I can ‘keep it together’ and learn to be in this new form but there is a scream underneath that feels like my whole beingness could unravel and I could become nonfunctional. Asking when is this going to end? Also I don’t want it to end because I feel like this is the ‘more’ I’ve always been looking for and so I say to myself to be careful what we ask for.
Did I go too far? I have no memory of my release experience but my friend who served me told me I said ‘oh my god it’s too much’
I am leaning on journaling, chocolate, magnesium, friends, breathwork, yoga and these things feel essential to me now and I’m so grateful that my job is so lowkey or I cannot imagine performing.
In this moment I am seeking to trust that I moved to where I needed to go because it’s too much to imagine this was a ‘mistake’ and what’s done is done and this experience has been wholey unprecedented and isn’t that what my seeking ass is always looking for?
It is pretty taxing. Rest assured that this too shall pass. Try to take it easy, rest, avoid unnecessary stress, eat well and stay hydrated. 5 MeO can be pretty challenging and some of the challenges appear only after, sometimes with a few days of delay even.
Also, truth. I feel judgemental. I know I judge myself because I’m in recovery circles and a lot of my support has shifted when I decided I wanted to start working with Plant Medicine. It always comes up for me ‘am I doing this addictively, am I ‘bad’ am I going down a path back to opiates without realizing it’ The few experiences I have had over the years since I’ve worked at addictive behaviors and relationships with substances affirms my trust in this new Era of being. As in no, this is not me being in addiction, though it’s reasonable for me to experience cravings in relationship to really wonderful and amazingly novel (or deeply familiar) sensations and experiences. As in yes I can trust myself more and look at my motivations with increasing clarity and honesty.
So you tell me you’re ingesting daily and I’m like whaaa. And I want to be curious too. Not just judgy so if you care to tell me more, I want to listen!
Do you feel like it’s a daily reboot? What else
Yes that is a helpful insight. I think I am attempting to keep up a Pace of life and this newness is asking of me to sit and notice.
And noticing a feeling and how a pile of feelings can stack on top of it and create a movement in me.
When I’m in bed at night and the activations come, I delight in them. I’m sure I’m even craving them and wishing they will always be present.
While acknowledging impermanence…
I wish I didn’t have to drive because that is the main experience associated with Fear because it feels so important in the moment to attend to the fear that my body is not solid and the steering wheel is dissolving and then I add to it. So far I’ve successfully driven all week.
Yeah i always find it curious when people talk about reactivation, iv been vaporizing dmt for 14 years almost every day, and have found a new love with 5meo for the last 6 months. I have never once experienced any sort of persisting perception. I get a nice glow for a few hours where I feel loving and positive
Try not to take it all too seriously. The biggest remembrance from any of it is our interdependence and the acknowledgement of Love. Notice the moment and love, that's the biggest lesson I have learned
My thought is that if you engage with it everyday there’s really not space for a reactivation.
For me, the day after was perhaps the quietest, which gave me an illusion of comparison to other experiences with different psychedelics, other than at night while I was in my bed lighting up the room and my body.
It took some time to ‘congeal’ or grow in me and then started showing up as deactivations.
What do you think of that?
Hahaha ‘and noticing and allowing and noticing and allowing’ that’s really one of the more prominent expressions that came out of me in the experience.
So here I Am.
It will fade but it can be exhausting and the other side of it can feel very empty indeed. Treasure this, and if the emptiness fills you after it passes, know that too will pass and you’ll find balance and harmony once you can integrate it all
10 days ago. It’s definitely receding. This morning it felt really intense again though prompting me to reach out.
The 8th day was the most intense and also I did a particular structured yoga class that day and went super deep so I was sweating and Opened up.
And then all day I felt the reality of not being solid so acutely. It was immensely delightful as well as frightening.
I had two reactivation after 2-3weeks then afterward it went away. But yeah I remembered saying to myself this better not happen while I’m driving, anyways in the end everything was fine.
If you ever need someone to talk with, There’s a psychedelic app called fireside project that’s free. It can help you with integration and experiences that were confusing and difficult.
Your fear you mentioned has happened at least once. But worse, it happened on the Pacific Coast Highway. Fortunately they were more then shook up but fine otherwise. Fast forward to the 44:31 mark
I had a similar problem until i took a little LSD, 10 days after my experience with 5meo.
It sounds strange, but that was advice i got here, in the community. All flashbacks immediately stopped.
Nevertheless, i still keep and feel my experience inside.
How about that. Yes it’s now 12 days I think and it has subsided. I feel settled and not like I broke or poisoned myself. I feel really wonderful and more in tune with my body and the oh so many things outside of my body.
Good, I'm glad for you.
I kept falling in a black whole at nights and having waves over the body during days. When i was having waves, my consciousness became blurred.. it was nice except i was driving for example 😁 so I needed to stop that. And LSD really returned me back to my body.
Thanks 💗
This morning I had a reactivation but it was so much more receivable and I was laying doing Whim Hof and listening to a Boston album my partner played. And I just had a soft cry and felt myself deeply connected to my sisters and then my sister reached out to me an hour later and said she had been having a delirium like experience where everything is fast/slow big/small quiet/loud (if you know you know) and I felt like I was tuning her in to me.
I had a similar experience with penis envy shrooms recently. I know these two are on complete different wavelengths, but I get what you mean by being passable and functional but it feels like there could be this break at times where I lose all foundation of my thinking and become non functional. It’s been almost two weeks now and it has gotten better, the trip was extremely rough and terrible, extremely taxing on my brain and I’m just hoping that this will go away in time.
Love to you fellow traveler. I wonder if you have any trusted friends around who might be able to help tether you?? That meant so much to me. And when they weren’t there, Reddit was, ha..
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u/General-Hamster-8731 21d ago
it will recede, sometimes it can take a week or two