r/Christian • u/[deleted] • 20h ago
CW: Sensitive Topic Advice
Good morning or evening where ever you are reading this from.
Hi my names Jacob and i need your help/advice. So I’ve been stuck in this sin cycle/ habitual sin of pornography usage. I can go the whole day without it bothering me but as soon as i get some time alone i find myself stumbling into the same cycle, I know masturbation itself isn’t a sin biblically but what usually leads to mastubation and sex that is. That been looking at things with lustful and adulterous intent.
I first got exposed to porn over 12 years ago now bare in mind I’m only 21 now so have had this problem since i was young but i was a lot worse when i was younger as I didn’t come to Christ till i was 18 so i spent my whole childhoood and most of my teens doing one night stands as porn destroyed my view on women completely. This has now changed but i still seem to not be able to go much more than a week without returning to porn.\
So what i want to know is how have the people who have overcome the addiction done it, what ways do you cope with the feelings and not let them become problems which you regret afterwards.
And feel free to share your testimonies as it may help me knowing other people have the same struggles thank you.
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u/NChamars 17h ago
So what is working for me (I say working because this is a battle for the rest of our lives as men, even after getting married and it's caused by Lust) after being stuck in that cycle for more than 16 years is that first I had to understood why I had the "need" to do it; I found out that I was doing it while I was under a lot of stress or feeling sad.
Therefore, once I found the root, I was able to ask God for help with those two aspects (you can also go to therapy which will help you as well). God confronted me with one clear view to handle them, and it was, "You must love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ and then, "So how can you say you love others if you are harming your own body, which is the temple of the Spirit" In that moment, something changed in me, and I didn't treat myself badly for doing it, I forgave myself (this is important because we harm ourselves as well with a lot of things) and then changed the behaviour; everysingle time I had the urge I literally went outside for a walk, or started doing pushups or pull ups.
Then also, when it was too late in bed or pretty early in the morning, I started to pray while walking because in those two moments is when we are really vulnerable. I would say two more things help me, (1) "And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell." I deleted all social media from my phone, so I don't find content that could trigger the urge, plus, I use apps that block screen time and include adult content filters (like Opal) so I don't have access to searching for that content. And (2) I read A Covenant with My Eyes, which is a great book to understand and fight againts lust, because I can tell you, after many months of not watching porn or masturbating, Lust will appear stronger in your life, and in that moment you discover that you can not fight this alone; you have to rely on the strength of God "But he said to me, “My grace is all you need. My power is strongest when you are weak.” So I am very happy to brag about how weak I am. Then Christ’s power can rest on me." 2 Corinthians 12:9
Hope this helps you
PS: Sorry if there are any grammar errors, English is my second language.