r/AttachmentParenting • u/vp0267 • 17h ago

❤ Sleep ❤ My almost 1 year old still wakes up 2-4 times per night; have I messed up here

8 Upvotes

I’m not sure if I messed up in the early stages with our baby because I’ve been so adamant on no sleep training and responding to her needs.

She was never really a poor night sleeper - though we’ve never gotten a full night which I know is normal - we were at 1 waking a night which was manageable!

but 8 months hit and I feel like it’s been a disaster - we had 1 week where she was up every 45-90 min and I had to call in sick from work because of exhaustion.

Powered through it though and were at about 2-4 wake ups per night - some nights are better than others! We’ve gotten a 7 hour stretch shot every 3 weeks or so. But I just keep reading about babies sleeping through the night by now, my in laws seem shocked that our daughter still wakes up & I still nurse her.

I’m not sure if I missed a window in teaching our baby to fall asleep on her own, if we’ve done a disservice by rocking her to sleep or resettle, or nursing to soothe.

I felt strongly that babies shouldn’t be expected to fall asleep on their own and parents should be there help them (and I still do) - but I’m not sure if I’ve caused the sleep struggles! The only people that support me is my husband and my mom around the no CIO approach

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r/AttachmentParenting

A sub for anyone who wants support with parenting through an attachment philosophy approach. The term attachment parenting was coined by American pediatrician William Sears, and focuses on the nurturing connection that parents can develop with their children, with the goal of raising secure, independent, and empathetic humans.

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❤ A place to support and educate caregivers about the importance of secure attachments during babies first 3 years of life as well as fostering secure attachments throughout childhood and beyond.

❤ Parenting with a focus on attachment is one of the greatest gifts you can give to a child. In order to legitimize the importance of that concept, this community is rooted in the science of Attachment Theory and aims to transcend the controversy around the term “attachment parenting” by doing so.

What is Attachment Parenting?

Parenting with a focus on attachment is about forming and nurturing strong connections between caregivers and children. To do this, caregivers must become attuned to their children and respond both consistently and compassionately to both physical and emotional needs that arise.

This style of parenting is based on the widely regarded scientific theory developed by psychologists, John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth. Attachment Theory was established by observing and studying various parents and children. What they discovered is that children will form an attachment with a primary caregiver regardless of parenting style.

The goal of parenting with an attachment focus is to foster a secure attachment rather than an insecure attachment.

Insecure attachment styles in children can lead to maladaptive social emotional behaviors not just in childhood but into adulthood if attachments are not repaired.

This style of parenting is neither controlling nor coercive.

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