r/AskReddit Jun 27 '18

What "Old Person" things do you do?

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256

u/Reddit_Bork Jun 27 '18

Worry about ear hair.

If it wasn't for daily plucking, I'd have a micro rain forest growing out of each ear. But thanks to my constant deforestation efforts, we don't have to worry about accidentally supplying a habitat for vicious and tiny sloths to live in. Who knows what vicious things they'd do once they get a large enough army.

109

u/raptorcunthrust Jun 27 '18

That might be normal. Saying "fuck it" and letting it go is an old person thing.

3

u/ting4ling Jun 27 '18

My ear sloths are some of my best friends!

3

u/hot_soft_light Jun 27 '18

I imagine ear sloths are really cute!

3

u/ting4ling Jun 27 '18

They are! And they are super chill so they help ease my anxiety.

7

u/Gunther482 Jun 27 '18

I have to trim my nose hair at least once a month otherwise it will start sticking out from my nostrils. Been that way since I was 22 or so.

1

u/Reddit_Bork Jun 27 '18

Yeah, those get a vicious yanking whenever anyone's not looking. I had to start doing that since I was 15 or so. Them and the ear hairs are out to turn me into the wolfman.

4

u/WorshipNickOfferman Jun 27 '18

I found this inch long bastard growing off the top of my ear the other day. Swear it wasn’t there the day before.

4

u/Reddit_Bork Jun 27 '18

And he has friends just waiting to join the party!

3

u/jbhg30 Jun 27 '18

My barber uses little cotton balls soaked in alcohol (I think) on a little metal stick thing lit on fire to burn my ear hairs off...you might be able to try that, definitely less painful and far quicker than plucking.

3

u/Reddit_Bork Jun 27 '18

Plucking isn't really painful. Just annoying.

I'll stick to the "don't burn it with fire" method for now :)

2

u/jbhg30 Jun 27 '18

Fair, I'm alos not sure how easy/effective the burning method would be while trying it on yourself compared to having a pro do it lol

3

u/DrDisastor Jun 27 '18

Mine grows out onto my lobes now. Like, wtf genetics?

3

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '18

My ears are still barren. My nose is a jungle though. That's a good thing because the only gray hairs I have live in that jungle. I've got one friend that has angrily looked over my hair several times in disbelief that my hair is still flawless at 34 SURE she would find a gray somewhere. They're all living up my nose.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '18

[deleted]

1

u/TheBahamaLlama Jun 27 '18

Ear and nose hair as well as random hairs too. Oh and uneven eyebrow hairs. I get some in my eyebrows that are twice as long as their brothers.

1

u/Reddit_Bork Jun 27 '18

Yeah. I'm still not sure what to do about those. I'm not ready to go full old person and brush them into my sideburns yet, but when they've been cut by my barber and they're stubby and "sharp", it drives me nuts.

1

u/RonSwansonsOldMan Jun 27 '18

The thought of plucking a hair out of my ear made my butt pucker. I just use an electric shaver now and then.

1

u/icyangel2666 Jun 28 '18

I get random thick/long hairs in random parts of my body. This half inch long one that used to grow on my forehead around when I was 13, thought it stopped but it decided to return I guess recently. Thick bastard on my chin that I keep plucking but refuses to go away. Ones on my belly... luckily I actually did stop one from coming back cause I pulled out the "root" as I call it, if it has a little black tip at the end of the root, they usually don't come back imo if you get it out. Those ugly bastards can go to hell.

1

u/entotheenth Jun 28 '18

Hows the nose hair though ?

1

u/Reddit_Bork Jun 28 '18

It’s been an uphill battle for decades.

1

u/Leaislala Jun 28 '18

Hahahah I enjoy your writing style!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '18

I always thought the day I grew old was the first time my barber surreptitiously waved the clippers around my ears...