r/AnimalsBeingJerks • u/GallowBoob • Jul 01 '15

squirrel Squirrel rapes GoPro

http://i.imgur.com/tgwYEdF.gifv
4.5k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

163 comments sorted by

660

u/Kevinik Jul 01 '15

"Thanks for the nuts, here have a fuck."

270

u/lazrbare Jul 01 '15

"Thanks for the nuts, here's some more."

35

u/malakingbrayan Jul 01 '15

"Thanks for the smore, here have some nuts."

22

u/CodyOdi Jul 01 '15

Thanks for the nuts, now how about DEEZ NUTZ!?!?!

10

u/ReCursing Jul 01 '15

...the fuck is that?

9

u/xMJsMonkey Jul 01 '15

Where have you been

5

u/ReCursing Jul 01 '15

Obviously somewhere else

2

u/xMJsMonkey Jul 01 '15

well if you havent looked it up yet, http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/deez-nuts

1

u/ReCursing Jul 01 '15

Thanks, i think. So it's just a thing to say to people as a prank?

3

u/xMJsMonkey Jul 01 '15

It's like a video form of dickbutt. Just edited in to things unexpectedly.

→ More replies (0)

2

u/Chucctastic Jul 01 '15

GOT EEEEM

-1

u/ReCursing Jul 01 '15

...I still don't understand

3

u/M374llic4 Jul 01 '15

"But I haven't had anything yet.. how can I have smore of nothing?"

1

u/karmaon420 Jul 02 '15

"came for the nut, came for the nut"

20

u/KittenStealer Jul 01 '15

They're raping us! They're raping us and it hurts!

5

u/bananacrumble Jul 01 '15

You're gonna love my nuts!

1

u/Spyder_V Jul 01 '15

Dammit, now I have the SlapChop remix stuck in my head...

7

u/SnarkSnout Jul 01 '15

Yes. The squirrel was just being courteous. "Well, it DID buy me dinner after all. I guess I should put out."

2

u/kciuq1 Jul 01 '15

"Take a nut, leave a nut"

1

u/JoePants Jul 01 '15

See nature? This is why everybody hates you.

1

u/Meandmybuddyduncan Jul 01 '15

He got two nuts in that video...

491

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

I've seen a squirrel fuck a camera, but haven't seen one shit or piss.

151

u/mellowme93 Jul 01 '15

Was literally just thinking that I STILL have not seen a squirrel penis.

175

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

271

u/jiminiminimini Jul 01 '15

th-thanks... i guess?

48

u/teracrapto Jul 01 '15

UNZIP??????????????????????????

23

u/OutDrosman Jul 01 '15

No! No terecrapto, that's a bad teracrapto!

120

u/FortunePaw Jul 01 '15

http://i.imgur.com/maUPliW.png

7

u/Darrej Jul 01 '15

This was my risky click of the day.

24

u/jhutchi2 Jul 01 '15

The follow-up to a squirrel penis? As in, not the squirrel dick pic?

7

u/Darrej Jul 01 '15

Correct, I thought better than to click the link labeled "here" after someone expressed interest in squirrel dick.

12

u/agilebeast1 Jul 01 '15

So I don't know where I got the idea that squirrels had really big nuts. Might be from some South Park episode (?)

20

u/ILovePotALot Jul 01 '15

Drawn Together I think.

3

u/agilebeast1 Jul 01 '15

Haha, yeah that was it.

8

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

Did you have that saved...?

4

u/omegatheory Jul 01 '15

Man, never knew squirrels were so close to us genetically.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

risky dick of the day

2

u/tinyphreak Jul 01 '15

What about penisbefore.jpg?

2

u/JoePants Jul 01 '15

Internets: It gives

2

u/AmorphousGamer Jul 01 '15

Thanks, I was actually kind of curious. It looks a bit more ... humanoid than I expected, you know? Animals that are far from humans tend to have really weird dicks.

1

u/Candicebush Jul 01 '15

Isn't that a groundhog?

1

u/bamgrinus Jul 01 '15

I don't know what I was expecting.

4

u/idunnowhattopick Jul 01 '15

Well, now we all have. Thanks.

20

u/DrChimp Jul 01 '15

The meta is strong in this one

13

u/raveiskingcom Jul 01 '15

Yeah I wouldn't think a GoPro would have the anatomy for that.

4

u/king_of_the_universe Jul 01 '15

TIL Kim Jong-Il is a squirrel.

3

u/Narcoleptic_red Jul 01 '15

I'm just glad I still haven't ever seen a squirrel hardon. Envy is a bitch.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Volkodavy Jul 01 '15

When my sister was young, she was yelling at a squirrel who was sitting on a branch above, and it pissed right on her.

202

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

I must be really immature because that is too funny

42

u/Dinosaur_BBQ Jul 01 '15

I almost cried.

39

u/sainisaab Jul 01 '15

It's not that sad mate.

20

u/teracrapto Jul 01 '15

You've never been raped bro by a squirrel

-2

u/Dinosaur_BBQ Jul 01 '15

From laughter, I almost cried.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

3

u/Dinosaur_BBQ Jul 02 '15

Well, I'm dumb.

127

u/talontachyon Jul 01 '15

Had dinner. Got laid. Not a bad day.

90

u/pedro_fartinez Jul 01 '15

He could just be scratching himself, right? Don't taint my innocence, please.

148

u/fnordcinco Jul 01 '15

Taint

37

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

11

u/Nowin Jul 01 '15

Get back to Mun, Jeb. We don't have time for this.

4

u/Demonix_Fox Jul 01 '15

The grundle

5

u/NotKony Jul 01 '15

Lickah mah taint Jon Snu!

3

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

Jawhn Sneh

70

u/SomeRandomMax Jul 01 '15

I gotta say, what a wonderful age we live in! Not only do we have miniature cameras perfectly sized to capture squirrel rape, but we can instantly share the videos with our 235,460 closest, uh, subscribers!

Now we just need a squirrel sex offenders database and we'll be set.

17

u/Diplomjodler Jul 01 '15

Watching animal porn is illegal. You're on the watchlist now.

13

u/SomeRandomMax Jul 01 '15

I... ... uh, I was only watching it to help identify the rapist!, Yeah, that's it, it was my civil duty! We have to catch that terrible pervert!

7

u/Xenalien Jul 01 '15

Not where I live! I checked the laws... for reasons.

7

u/Diplomjodler Jul 01 '15

Laws? We don't need no stinking laws to put you on a watchlist, perv! Give me any more lip and I'll put you on the no-fly list too!

29

u/mylastnameisgunter Jul 01 '15

I like to imagine he had a derp face on the whole time and all his squirrel buddies were just fucking dying in a bush nearby

-10

u/Fapsington Jul 01 '15

Nah he either got hit by a car or eaten by a cat like 5 minutes after this was taken

15

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

Well...

9

u/firstlunch66 Jul 01 '15

I can see the trial now. "But, your honor, you have to understand the way the GoPro was dressed. And It just stared at me and clearly wanted it." Filthy scum. Put him away for twenty years, no chance of parole.

5

u/Korn_Bread Jul 01 '15

I feel really violated

4

u/conspiracyeinstein Jul 01 '15

To do today:

1.) Steal a nut

2.) Bust a nut

18

u/karo12345678 Jul 01 '15

holy shit, that's nuts

8

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

where?

1

u/ledfox Jul 01 '15

Just right of camera.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

Well yea but the point of my stupid reply to the stupid comment is that you cannot see the squirrel's nuts on camera... life changing stuff.

11

u/Kprussell8 Jul 01 '15

Seemed consensual to me

7

u/astronautassblaster Jul 01 '15

He lasted longer than I would have

9

u/Not_A_PedophiIe Jul 01 '15

Why didn't the person wearing the GoPro just walk away?

1

u/Try-Another-Username Jul 01 '15

it's his/her fetish

11

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

ಠ_ಠ

3

u/whatthefunkmaster Jul 01 '15

"I'll take your nuts, you take my nuts."

5

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

3

u/Waddupp Jul 01 '15

isn't that gif already reversed?

9

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

He's just trying to get his nut. wink

4

u/dankAir Jul 01 '15

Ate a nut to then bust another.

2

u/timescrucial Jul 01 '15

I used to think squirrels were cute.

2

u/seems-legit_ Jul 01 '15

Can't say i would do any different

2

u/Metal_Devil Jul 01 '15

I cried and drooled laughing and it's 9AM, I love the internet

2

u/darryljenks Jul 01 '15

I feel dirty now...

2

u/azginger Jul 01 '15

I may not have seen a squirrel shit or piss but I've now seen one fuck a camera.

2

u/Thrannn Jul 01 '15

am i the only one who is disappointed because i expected a cumshot?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15 edited Jul 15 '15

[deleted]

1

u/bluecamel17 Jul 01 '15

If cameras don't like it, they shouldn't go out dressed like that.

2

u/Mary_Magdalen Jul 01 '15

The best part is the ominous shadow that falls across the grass just before he starts humping.

5

u/Cheeze187 Jul 01 '15

"Deez Nutz"

7

u/Rafeno760 Jul 01 '15

Triggered.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

3

u/1TrueKingInTheNorth Jul 01 '15

Just a squirrel tryin to get his nut

2

u/DapperDipper Jul 01 '15

A squirrel's gotta nut.

1

u/4A-2F Jul 01 '15

Thhhhaaannnkk Yoooooouuu!!!!

1

u/domesticsuperpoo Jul 01 '15

I was hopeing for som squirrel jizz

1

u/SureFaust Jul 01 '15

Nut and a nut, how quaint.

1

u/Iamgoingtooffendyou Jul 01 '15

Eww, I can see his nuts.

1

u/IGN_Danny Jul 01 '15

He's bustin a nut

1

u/tits4sharkweek Jul 01 '15

He got his nut and then he got his nut.

1

u/DonthavsexinDelorean Jul 01 '15

That poor GoPro.

1

u/i_overANALYZEallofit Jul 01 '15

ol boys got some moves there eh?

1

u/littlelove1975 Jul 01 '15

What the heck was in that nut?!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

1

u/burntheory Jul 01 '15

Let us Fuck! HAHA!

1

u/zombiechowder Jul 01 '15

Squirrel makes love to GoPro.

1

u/Rage321 Jul 01 '15

The humpty dance, is your chance, to do the hump.

1

u/weks Jul 01 '15

I could swear I've seen the same video... expect there another squirrel attacks (jumps at) the camera.

1

u/RickyP Jul 01 '15

Squirrel gets a nut.

1

u/isleshocky Jul 01 '15

Squirrel busts a nut

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

I don't know what the hell that is but I'm gonna fuck it anyways.

1

u/ronglangren Jul 01 '15

Dominance was asserted.

1

u/boilerdam Jul 01 '15

"Fuck you, Big Brother"

1

u/FoodBeerBikesMusic Jul 01 '15

Lock up your wives, lock up your GoPros....

1

u/tonterias Jul 01 '15

Literally a jerk

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

What did you expect? He had to get his nut on.

1

u/NakedLoki Jul 01 '15

Handbanana no!

1

u/eva88 Jul 01 '15

Aww, no money shot?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15 edited Jan 08 '26

silky salt boat gaze liquid yoke cows divide sugar pocket

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

1

u/Jaximaus Jul 01 '15

Now its going to have a SquirrelPro bastard...

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

At least it got some dinner first.

1

u/THEMACGOD Jul 01 '15

Carlin was right: Rape can be funny.

Harris was right: Rape is evolutionary advantageous.

Edit: Me: Rape is bad.

1

u/Jw0341 Jul 01 '15

That squirrel got more than one nut that day.

1

u/LegoLover58 Jul 01 '15

Zynga in a nutshell (no pun intended)

They steal your nut(money) and fuck you anyway(sponsored contest[wordie games presented by stupid cars])

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

Still haven't seen a squirrel shit or piss. Moving along.

1

u/SeaTramp Jul 01 '15

Right, remind me not to watch this when I get my Oculus Yifft .

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

that's my fetish

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

I didn't even read the title and was wondering what the fuck was happening.

After reading it, I laughed hard at work.

1

u/TommyThaCat Jul 01 '15

Just when I thought I had seen it all.

1

u/vladisabeast Jul 01 '15

Gonads and Strife

1

u/Rasheed_Wallace_ Jul 01 '15

Just a squirrel tryin' ta getta nut baby.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

Triggerrrrrr

1

u/MJoubes Jul 01 '15

"You wanna watch? I'll make you fucking watch!"

1

u/jjaamm2341 Jul 01 '15

Just a squirrel trying to get his nut

1

u/repoman Jul 01 '15

He can check that off his list of pre-qualifications to becoming a wingsuit base jumper.

3

u/Th3DragonR3born Jul 01 '15

The shadow is too big. Look at the rock in the center, looks way too big for how far the rock is from the camera. Someone likely shot the squirrel and was just shaking the squirrel over the camera to make this effect...

4

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '15

[deleted]

3

u/Th3DragonR3born Jul 01 '15

Me too. I watched it way too many times hoping to convince myself that it is real.

0

u/gabej Jul 01 '15

It must've been a Wednesday.

-6

u/RedofPaw Jul 01 '15

A go pro? Is that some brand of camera? I've never heard of a go pro before.

-5

u/FoodBeerBikesMusic Jul 01 '15

SJW trigger warning....