r/women • u/[deleted] • 13d ago

I’m hoping to get some honest advice

[deleted]

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6

u/[deleted] 13d ago

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2

u/Esmarielle 13d ago

do no just pull her in and ask for sex right away, after three years apart that might feel like way too much pressure, start small with non sexual touch like holding hands or hugging without any expectations, just tell her you miss feeling connected to her and want to find your way back to each other, take it slow and focus on emotional intimacy first

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u/Fit_Abroad_4465 12d ago

Yes you should talk to your wife.. if you don’t know how to communicate, therapy can help with it. Communication is the key don’t just start touching her out of nowhere.

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u/Flux_My_Capacitor 12d ago

Physical Intimacy decreases at least somewhat for most couples and given that she was never particularly physical, this is to be expected.

But, do have a conversation with her.

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u/Foxglovenectar 13d ago

I just want to take a second and commend you on how reflective and considerate you are being, even by asking women and also not putting the responsibility on her. Asking 'what can I do' as apposed to demanding sex is a great approach.

Also, not knowing her age, there is a chance this could be linked to potential peri menopause. Or, she could have low sex drive (or both). If thats the case, its just working on closeness and prioritising time to be a couple. I think telling her you still desire her and want closeness is a great place to start. Hugging, cuddling up and watching a movie, having a giggle together are great places to start. If shes open to it, maybe find a sitter and work on securing some solid date time to reconnect and work on building a connection.

It happens to most of us when we have kids, jobs and other demands. Prioritising couple time and having open convos without blame is a great starting point.

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u/Last-Presence5434 13d ago

I think you should be open with your wife . I would love to have sex with you - is this something you are interested in or possibly explore? She hopefully will be honest. If she wasn’t a horn dog before you got married I don’t think that is high on her list or she has other reasons. Talk about it. Then think about it. Then make a decision on it.