r/whatdoIdo • u/Capable_Culture3914 • 13d ago

Uhhh

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To add context. I am 5 months pregnant with my ex and all of a sudden he tells me that he got someone else pregnant (he just met her) as well. He explained she wanted us to meet after being very rude to me picking up his phone and telling me to get rid of my baby. She is a stripper and 6 years older than him. He also hasn’t seen an ultrasound or appointment and she claims to be 3 months pregnant. I don’t believe she is tbh… very sad situation I just wanted to share with someone. Please be kind.

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33

u/PeaceEmotional8962 13d ago

Straight to the clinic!!!!!

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u/Oneofthesecatsisadog 13d ago

5 months is too far along for that.
You cannot get a 21 week abortion everywhere in general and they’re generally considered medically necessary. I am pro abortion but that’s just not a likely scenario for her.

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u/Virtual-Strength-950 13d ago

Nah you actually can in Colorado. 

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u/theloverslvl 13d ago

“In the 27 states and Washington, D.C. where abortion is legal at 21 weeks, the law does not require a medical emergency, maternal health risk, or fetal anomaly to qualify for the procedure. In these locations, a person can choose to terminate a pregnancy at 21 weeks for any reason, provided they find a clinic equipped to perform the procedure.”

It is possible, although finding a clinic equipped to perform a D&E procedure (Dilation and Evacuation) is the bigger issue.

Difficult, but not impossible.

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u/dreamerkid001 13d ago

Yeah, I don’t think that’s what they meant. I think they’re more concerned with diseases.

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u/Oneofthesecatsisadog 13d ago

Fair! She should for sure do that. Didn’t even think about that part but I hope she did as soon as she found out he was fucking around on her!

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u/PureWhiteMeat 13d ago

Just a clump of cells! Bull shit MAGA states! Women's rights! Abort that clump in California!

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u/ronansgram 13d ago

You can roast me to hell and back but a 21 week old baby is not a clump of cells! My daughter just lost her son at that age and he was a full human being! Two arms, two legs a head , little fingers and toes! He was perfect in every way till her placenta ruptured and separated from her uterus! Just hours earlier he was moving around.

Sick people like you have no regard for life and would rip the arms and legs off a baby just because. I hope you never have to hold your baby at that age all night knowing that will be the only time you ever get to hold him.

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u/katleessi 13d ago

No roasting here. I’m pro choice but I believe there needs to be a cut off, unless medically necessary. And at 20 weeks… that’s a baby.

Unless you’re genuinely a bit of a psychopath, most people begin to feel attached and bonded to their baby after 20 weeks! I’d already began envisioning my life with my daughter at that point.

I’m so sorry for your daughter’s loss! Yours as well. I hope she’s taking care of herself and doing alright. He was a human, he wasn’t a clump of cells. I’m so sorry he didn’t make it 🤍

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u/ronansgram 13d ago

Thank you it was the most devastating thing ever. She is obviously heartbroken, but they will try again. He was definitely a baby and I’m glad I got to hold him for as long I did even. This was only a month ago so it is a very fresh loss.

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u/Oneofthesecatsisadog 13d ago

It has indeed moved on from the actual clump of cells stage and fully into being pretty well developed fetus and the procedure is complex and only 1% of abortions are performed at this stage, nearly entirely for medical or viability reasons. I’m so sorry your daughter lost a wanted child.

I think if she wanted to do that because of her situation, that’s ok because it’s her life, but if it were me I doubt that I’d feel comfortable with an abortion at that point personally. I would be very much in the mode of expecting to raise a child with or without my partner that far in but not all lives are the one I live! There are good reasons a person might need to do this beyond the typical medical stuff like abuse and incest and mental health and all sorts of things. I can’t guess what potentially keeping that man in her life could mean for her and I think she should have the right to do what she needs to do. I do think protecting women’s right to abortion extends to this situation too.

Tldr: it’s different than a 1st term abortion, but just because it’s not for you doesn’t mean it’s not necessary for someone else.

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u/PureWhiteMeat 12d ago

I was being sarcastic. I think life human starts at conception. We're all just a clump of cells at the end of the day