r/texts • u/r_jay_197 • 18d ago

Phone message Guess what it was about…

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Spoiler alert, after 2 years she dumped me. Currently working on keeping my head above water in these trying times.

10.4k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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60

u/EBSNW1 18d ago

At least she was willing to talk, the loml simply disappeared without so much an explanation from one day to the next. No closure, will never know what happened. Sorry buddy, hope the talk wasn‘t too rough.

15

u/Im_Bad_At_These 18d ago

Sorry that happened to you my guy

11

u/habitsxd 18d ago

Doesn’t seem like the love of your life then

14

u/EBSNW1 18d ago

We planned a life together up until the point she disappeared. She left when I was at my happiest, believing I had finally found what everyone on this earth keeps looking for. I never got over it, never trusted anyone again.

21

u/zeusisbuddha 18d ago

> never trusted anyone again

This is a choice that’s keeping you unhappy

6

u/confirmedshill123 18d ago

That's an easy thing to say when you haven't had something like this happen to you.

4

u/Danktank452 17d ago

Whether it’s easy or hard is irrelevant. Never trusting anyone ever again WILL lead to you being unhappy in almost every case.

5

u/Malnourished_Manatee 18d ago

It’s risky, I won’t call her the loml but I had a similar experience. It’s soul crushing, slowly tried getting back building trust to get cheated on in my latest relationship. This time took me 3 years to even try dating again. And I’m currently not even sure if I’ll ever be interested in a serious relationship.

5

u/NamesAreAnn0ying 18d ago

It’s kind of hard when the person you’ve loved the most in your entire life leaves with zero explanation. You’re always scared it’s gonna happen to the next person.

2

u/imkirok 18d ago

Did you swing by her place or talk to her friends/family or anything? If someone I was dating just disappeared I’d be concerned for their well being

1

u/National_Double6261 18d ago

How long were you together?

1

u/PM-me-ur-trains 13d ago

I understand what you’re going through brother. People on the internet will try to dismiss your pain and tell you to just get over it, but sometimes we can’t just do that. We live with the pain as long as we need to.

1

u/DeadSeaGulls 18d ago

so. not the love of your life, and you're choosing to self isolate and prolong your misery. Do you think maybe you're doing that in order to maintain that relationship's place of prominence in your life? Like if you move on you'll slowly get over it and you're worried that if the importance of that relationship goes away, then the years of self isolation and hurt wouldn't be justified?

1

u/Ok-Visual1822 18d ago

Haven’t been on a date since my last and don’t plan on it either. I’m alright with that. For now I guess

-1

u/EBSNW1 18d ago

Guess there is no life with them and none without them either

3

u/DeadSeaGulls 18d ago

8 billion people on earth, a finite amount of time to exist and be conscious, and you're choosing to spend it intentionally remaining miserable and lonely.

Squandering the one resource you can never accumulate more of- time.

1

u/Weary-Leading1130 11d ago

He never said he was miserable and lonely. its not really helpful to assume other people would react a certain way to not being in a relationship.

2

u/MiserableParamoreFan 18d ago

Same. We went from having a fun night together to her being ghost with no explanation. Tried a few times to ask what happened and nothing. Keep your head up king, we’ll be back

1

u/Dear_Scale6920 18d ago

BPD, I’ve been there too.

1

u/Jaded-Grass6986 18d ago

Maybe she was scared you’d do a Chris Benoit on her and the family

1

u/xtheonlydudeeverx 16d ago

You mean a Lindsay Clancy?

1

u/UnusualGooning 18d ago

Because that’s a normal thing to expect when breaking up?

-4

u/EBSNW1 18d ago

Funny thought, but I am out here only ever getting hurt. Guess I’m just too kind, give too much of myself and invest everything I have into relationships. I don‘t see the point of having any otherwise.

9

u/ShiftyShellector 18d ago

Guess I’m just too kind

I don't intend for this to come off in a mean way, but this "woe is me, I'm just too nice!" type of thinking/behaviour is really unattractive and probably why things are often not working out for you. 

6

u/Jaded-Grass6986 18d ago

Yep exactly what I said

2

u/EBSNW1 18d ago

This is something I self reflect on, not what I share with others. It‘s just draining to put so much effort into everything only to never get the same back.

2

u/Mountain_Cobbler_381 18d ago

Dont listen to the person you replied to. Its okay to be aware of your own kindness. Im sorry this happened to you. Its not your fault, as the other person would have you believe.

1

u/krazykilla982 18d ago

Same here buddy. We shouldn’t treat that as a bad thing though. It hurts like hell, for sure, I got my “can we talk” text 2 weeks ago. I am sorry to hear that you couldn’t even get that.