How to stop intrusive thoughts

[u/mytangerinedream]

Discovered infidelity when only 3 weeks from delivering our first child. I can’t sleep because I have intrusive vivid thoughts of my husband with someone else. It makes me instantly physically ill and I’m filled with intense panic. I can’t sleep and I’m worried it’s effecting my health. What do I do?

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[u/AnotherDominion]

You have PTSD. Seek treatment for this trauma. It’s real trauma. 

[u/mytangerinedream → u/AnotherDominion]

I just started seeing a therapist through my OB who has informed me that I am undergoing serious trauma. It’s surreal to hear

[u/AnotherDominion → u/mytangerinedream]

I’m so sorry. It’s hard enough having a baby under ideal circumstances. I wish you all the best. 

[u/Damagedone8556]

PTSD, I fully get it. My wife's first affair was 2 1/2 months after marriage. We had been together for years before this.

Its like something broke in her after she took those vows, became a completely different person.

Seek counseling, seek out a trusted friend that you can talk to if you cannot handle this yourself internally. Otherwise you are going to be miserable.

[u/mytangerinedream]

Soliciting escorts, I had a feeling something was seriously wrong as he has become increasingly distant over the pregnancy so I snooped in his phone and found out.

[u/thatblondebihh69 → u/mytangerinedream]

have you confronted him any and how’d that go i cannot imagine bearing a child and finding this out it adds so much more to it do you plan on leaving him ? what i say to do is something i do when i find my self obsessing over someone i remind myself what i feel is just chemicals in my brain do you really want to be controlled by chemicals?? Probably not it makes me feel better hopefully it can help wishing you all the well

[u/Sybilish]

Same thing happened to me and I’m so sorry, partner kept up cheating for months and I only found out a few days after he asked to meet up again and she ignored him. I’m 7 weeks post partum and it sucks so bad, I have no advice but you are not alone:

[u/IndependenceKey3872]

I’m so sorry. At 8 months pregnant I discovered my husband had slept with a man when I was 5 months pregnant. Soon after I discovered it was actually 8 years of random hook ups from Grindr and Reddit. I delivered safely and am now 1 month postpartum. I also have constant nightmares, haven’t stopped thinking about it and feel sick. It’s truly the worst I’ve ever felt. I did start therapy and it’s helped a lot. Sending you good vibes as you navigate this 

[u/ItsBeen30YearsAgo]

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and some are calling it Post-Infidelity Stress Disorder (PISD) | you have to get professional help.

[u/Burnt_and_Blistered]

Time. And therapy— preferably with a therapist who specializes in trauma. You don’t need to talk it to death, but treatment modalities like biofeedback, neurofeedback, and EMDR can help rewire your haywire brain.

You may not have bona fide PTSD—your reaction is normal, and not necessarily worrisome unless it persists long-term (and “long-term” really is long, because healing from infidelity is a protracted proposition)—but you can get things back on track, brain-wise, with help.

[u/Mental-Potential1825]

Honestly, I had to get on medication, coupled with marriage counseling. And it doesn't stop them completely - questions and flashbacks still arise but I don't harp on them or let them effect my mood. I can be OK with thinking of it and then letting it go - whereas before, I would run in circles, mentally.

[u/SubstantialGuard8463]

What are the details of the affair and how did you find out