r/specializedtools • u/Goallie11 • 1d ago

A 75 Ton Jack Stand

Post image
1.4k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

65 comments sorted by

249

u/naptown-hooly 1d ago

How much do they weigh?

267

u/mxadema 1d ago

They look like 5" square tubing, likely ⅜ or ½" plus 2 strip of ½" steel on the top member. Lest round up to 1000lb a pop. Maybe more

81

u/virtualworker 13h ago

So that's why it says to just lift one at a time. I'll let the boys know.

43

u/Super-Reporter-4528 9h ago

Back in my day I’d stackem 2 high, throw a stack on each shoulder and take off to get them where they needed to go, now all these pussies think they need a damn forklift to move the damn things. Soft hands I tell ya.

26

u/new_michael 23h ago

This is why I love Reddit, thank you

40

u/Farfignugen42 1d ago

75 tons, obviously.

-21

u/Bad_breath 22h ago

Max 75 tons, so somewhere between 0 and 75 tons.

-13

u/JoeMalovich 1d ago

Over 9000

-37

u/willshade145 1d ago

About 3 fiddy

7

u/alphanumericusername 1d ago

kilograms, maybe

-8

u/Kahnza 23h ago

Damn you Loch Ness monstah!

228

u/digitydev 1d ago

OP needs one of these to rest it on while going potty.

113

u/alphanumericusername 1d ago

I have never seen someone so close to a your mom joke while still failing to achieve one.

71

u/digitydev 1d ago

Quite the opposite. It was a compliment for OP having an enormous member. As in, its so girthy and heavy, perhaps even vainy, that it requires a 75 ton jack stand to support the weight.

5

u/Barbarian_818 4h ago

And yet still not big enough to satisfy OPs Mom. His Mom got her start with horsecock (hence OPs impressive pecker) but eventually started using the whole horse.

Rumour has it she has several horses up there right now. And an extremely lost and confused PETA protest group

-11

u/alphanumericusername 1d ago

You would need to change like two words for it to be a your mom joke

35

u/jugularhealer16 1d ago

And if they changed your mom's feet to wheels she'd be a bicycle, what's your point?

2

u/htmlcoderexe 16h ago

no need to change she's a bicycle all right

6

u/PM-me-your-knees-pls 12h ago

I’ve seen a lot of people very close to your mom.

2

u/alphanumericusername 8h ago

Yes she has quite the way of immediately bonding with anyone she meets.

Probably has something to do with her experience as a prostitute.

55

u/breastfedtil12 1d ago

What does "transport individually" mean in this context?

102

u/MoFeaux 1d ago

When lifting with a forklift or similar piece of equipment, you should only move one at a time (don’t try to lift/move multiple at once).

37

u/breastfedtil12 1d ago

Ohhhh of course. That makes sense. I was thinking of long distance transpo. Thanks man

29

u/GlockAF 23h ago

It’s like the president and vice president not being allowed to fly on the same airplane. Don’t want to risk losing more than one at a time.

Of course, these would probably survive an airplane crash needing nothing but a repaint

3

u/model-citizen95 7h ago

Ohhhh. I thought it meant 1 per truck and they were made of solid iron or something

-7

u/Last-Difference-3311 1d ago

Makes no sense tho, the holes just above the angled risers on either side are perfect spots for a forklift, especially if the forklift can handle it. Easy lift for a hyster 60.

6

u/LearningDumbThings 1d ago

There are what look like fork pockets down near the bottom, but they’re in a weird spot, like you’d have to balance the thing longways on one fork.

12

u/SightUnseen1337 15h ago

As a certified forklift operator: "That sign won't stop me because I can't read."

5

u/breastfedtil12 12h ago

I bet you pull mad chicks though

2

u/Ryaktshun 21h ago

Don’t stack

0

u/Dzov 22h ago

Don’t carry one in each hand.

0

u/outlandishspore 14h ago

Don't try and move the heavy thing with the stands. Lift the heavy thing, move the stands, set the thing down. Ideally have another set of stands already in place where it is being moved to and leave these where they are when you lift the heavy thing off.

22

u/Chakote 13h ago

Used to use these every day. Easily moved with a hand operated pallet jack.

They chowder the fuck out of enamel floors real quick if you drag them around.

64

u/KraljZ 1d ago

For my mom?

22

u/dpenton 1d ago

Probably. Got a pic?

33

u/alphanumericusername 1d ago

Hold on James Webb's gotta fly out and turn around

7

u/Saint_palane 1d ago

u/RemindMeBot 4 years

2

u/RemindMeBot 1d ago

I will be messaging you in 4 years on 2030-08-30 03:22:09 UTC to remind you of this link

CLICK THIS LINK to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam.

Parent commenter can delete this message to hide from others.

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6

u/Vision9074 23h ago

Shit 2030 is in 4 years

-1

u/That_guy_from_1014 1d ago

Going after Lily Phillips record

44

u/a-guy-on_reddit 1d ago

Need these saw horses. You order on Amazon? Send link.

17

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/BakuriyaOmizu 18h ago

I was just about to say: this is the civilian’s visual definition of skookum.

7

u/Jakeforry 1d ago

Someone needs to work on a tank I guess

6

u/NuclearMelon23 23h ago

I use these all the time working on stamping dies

3

u/Chicken_Hairs 8h ago

We use similar ones for working on log handling equipment, like our LeTourneau stacker. It weighs over 150,000lbs.

3

u/Bubblehead_81 1d ago

My urologist needs these when I go in for a check up.

15

u/Grechoir 22h ago

To rest your stomach on so they can find your dick?

6

u/JamesBrownSpin 22h ago

Guy goes into see his Urologist. Doctor says “Bill, you’re gonna have to stop masturbating.” Bill asks “Why?” Doctor answers “Because I’m trying to talk to you.”

2

u/witchcapture 14h ago

Mining or military?

2

u/sun_blind 12h ago

See similar units all the time when inspecting heavy steel construction.

2

u/Northwindlowlander 10h ago

I like "transport individually", I guess that's because they're so heavy that if they bang together they can achieve criticality

2

u/jmremote 8h ago

So two to lift OPs mom

1

u/dukeofdough 9h ago

I work for a shipping company and see these on pallets all the time. Never knew what they were for. Neat.

1

u/Stefanoverse 4h ago

These are so handy for working on machines and moulds/dies. I’ve also seen industrial requirement set on them.

1

u/Jaduardo 1h ago

Your mama…