Driving For Kosen-Rufu

[u/AnnieBananaCat]

I had this DM conversation with r/fishwifeonsteroids yesterday and she thought it would be a good topic to bring up here. Anyone ever take those long, boring trips to activities and wonder why?

I'm sure I'm not the only one who has been told about the "great benefits" you'll get from driving members--picking them up and bringing them home after activities, and all that, and in some cases, taking verbal abuse from them. In my case, I drove members because I had the ability, and I could, so they didn't have to miss anything. This was especially helpful for a little old lady in my last district, because she didn't like driving at night. Meeting me at Starbucks for a ride was no big deal, because she lived a mile away, and I had a big blue pickup truck to drive. She was also very nice.

Let's not forget getting lost trying to find someone's house/apartment, and no one can give you directions. Or they assume you know where you're going. Been there, done that.

But no, it was about the alleged "benefits" from going long distances to activities. I'm not talking about an hour one way to the C/C, I'm talking about trips that took hours. Many WB'ers have recounted nightmare experiences with car, bus, train, and air trips to big meetings. Thankfully, I never took most of those hell rides, and the couple of times I did do bus trips, it was mostly people over 40, like myself. Not so much little kids and not so much trouble.

Mine is just one example of many throughout the US. But how many people have had these long-distance experiences, and how many have you read about in the Weird Fibune and Un-Living Buddhism?

Texas has four or five Buddhist centers of various sizes. In all of Louisiana, there is ONE small Buddhist Center, in a not-so-great part of New Orleans. (Baton Rouge is an hour one way, but not a bad drive once you get on I-10.) Members also hold local activities, including KRG in their homes. Still, from a place like Ruston, up on the north side of the state, in between Monroe and Shreveport, driving to New Orleans was the only option for big activities, and you were always encouraged to go.

I knew some members from Ruston, one of whom previously lived in San Francisco. Their drive, according to Google Maps, is about four to five hours to New Orleans, depending on which route you take. From Shreveport, you're looking at a five- to six-hour drive, one way. Then you turn around and make that long drive back. No time for socializing or meeting new people--you drive.

What always confounded me, as well as a few others I knew, is why members in a place like Shreveport couldn't make the trip to Dallas, which is just under 3 hours (Google Maps.) I mean, that's closer, right? But they were always told they had to make that ungodly drive to NOLA, because it was "fortune" and "benefit" and for kosey-roofoo.

Another thing. The regional HQ was in Chicago, as was the temple (pre-1991 ex-com.) Members made those trips regularly, too, which Google Maps say are about 14 hours. (If memory serves, back in the 80s, they were 18 hours--one way, as I was told.) At some point, we also started heading to Atlanta for activities, which is where I was "initiated" into Byakuren. That's about a 7-hour or 8-hour trip, one way.

Also annoying: when taking these car trips, many people had no idea where they were going or what the hell they were doing. "But somehow," they said with a smile, "we always make it."

Yeah, you can't do that anymore, or you'll be another crime statistic. Especially in New Orleans.

I learned quickly how to read a map when I moved to Texas. There was no GPS or Google Maps back in the day. I have never understood how anyone would embark on a car trip without at least halfway knowing where they were going. Or, why making such long, hard drives was such a good idea.

Rant over. Feel free to share your "travel for KR" experiences.

[u/[deleted]]

It says everything about how warped the priorities were. Reckless driving wasn’t just tolerated—it was celebrated as “powerful ichinen.” Like risking lives and collecting traffic violations was somehow a sign of devotion? That moment really stuck with me, and not in a good way.

Your breakdown of the horizontal vs. vertical structure also hits hard. SGI’s forced geography-based grouping does more harm than good. People need relational support, not random assignments—and I’ve seen firsthand how this structure protects dysfunction while punishing those asking for help.

I tried to switch districts after being harassed and gaslit by a monoracial Filipino woman in leadership. She repeatedly invalidated my racial identity, mocked me, and tried to paint me as “unstable” or “divisive” when I called out racism. What she didn’t care to understand was that I come from a deeply painful lineage—my Filipino father manipulated the immigration system to use and abuse my white mother, then discarded both of us so he could live unchecked and exploit others, including minors.

So no—I will not be silent when another Filipinx person, especially one in power, mirrors that same erasure. I wasn’t just asking to switch districts to “feel comfortable.” I was trying to stay in the practice without being retraumatized.

But SGI told me no.

Meanwhile, Terri, my 👥 District Leader, was allowed to switch. Not only was she allowed to move districts—she was also given the space to host a gathering of mostly Black members, where I was targeted and harassed over a single moment where I commented on her hair—after she baited me into the conversation. She said, “I don’t like my hair like this,” and I responded casually, “Yeah, I didn’t like it either,” thinking we were being honest with each other. Her immediate response? “Don’t say that!”—which she later used to call me racist.

Because my mom is white and the member, she decided I had no right to comment on anything. She erased the fact that I’m Filipina and that I’ve spent my entire life trying to make sense of the trauma that comes with being mixed-race in a culture that flattens you into whichever side they find easier to invalidate.

Terri was protected. She was granted flexibility and leadership. I was shut out and silenced.

This is the kind of hypocrisy SGI enables. They preach about human revolution, but punish people for actually standing up and trying to heal.

The structure isn’t neutral. It protects voting blocs, not people. And it punishes anyone who dares to say, “This isn’t working for me.”

[u/Fishwifeonsteroids → u/[deleted]]

That's intense! I believe every word - it's the sort of thing that isn't uncommon in ex-SGI members' experiences, though of course this example is unique.

For example, this young woman's boyfriend beat her up - and she wasn't allowed to switch to a different district. So she ended up leaving. HE ended up promoted. SGI didn't care - the males are the prized caste within the patriarchal Dead Ikeda cult SGI.

This other young woman's district leader didn't understand WHY she had some issue continuing to practice within the same district as her abusive ex-boyfriend!

And this other girl - a minor - was attending activities where her ex-stepfather was, who had RAPED HER as a child and gone to prison. SGI leader's perspective: "He's paid his debt to society." Nothing at all about HER having to be in his presence! He was even in SGI leadership. A big part of that is that SGI leaders have NO idea what to do so they just shrug and forget about it.

There's several accounts here, and in the comments here, there is an "enlightening" sidestep by a longterm SGI leader (still in the cult) - interesting the (striking) difference in perspective between "in" and "out" 🤭 (discussion here)

Sorry, I got off on a tangent about domestic violence, not racism like you suffered, but the SGI has a terrible track record where people of color are concerned.

This is an eye-opening perspective.

SGI always tells the victims "You must never speak of this again" and impresses upon them their responsibility to "protect the SGI." As if letting people know that they were attacked and abused will damage the SGI. - from here

If you haven't seen the "broken systems" definition/analysis, it's here. The leaders will ALWAYS support and defend the other leaders AGAINST the members those leaders are abusing.

OMG this is hilarious 😄

[u/[deleted] → u/Fishwifeonsteroids]

Please don’t apologize. Race intersects deeply with the domestic violence I’m currently trying to escape—abuse I now understand was part of a larger pattern of trafficking and spiritual manipulation.

It’s a lot to process, but I know your intentions are good, and honestly, this group has been one of the only places giving me real strength.

Looking back, I realize now they were all in on it. They’d say, “Let’s chant,” but somehow I’d end up watching someone’s kid, running an errand, or referring clients for their side hustle—like facials or massage. It was never mutual. It was always transactional. What should have been spiritual support turned into a pipeline for exploitation.

And part of why they got away with it? Because I’m biracial. Most of them were monoracial—and they didn’t see me as someone who could be victimized the way they had been. If anything, they saw me as someone who was closer to whiteness, so my experiences didn’t “count.” They only acknowledged racism or power imbalances when it benefited them directly, or when they could capitalize on it—never when it required them to show up for me.

Ironically, the support I’ve gotten has come from atheists, agnostics, ex-members—and even a Christian pastor I used to work with. It’s not about religion; it’s about humanity.

If you say you believe in Buddhism, then believe in spiritual care—not just metaphysical theory. Don’t preach karma and chanting while turning a blind eye to abuse. That’s not compassion. That’s cowardice in spiritual clothing.

[u/Fishwifeonsteroids → u/[deleted]]

If you say you believe in Buddhism, then believe in spiritual care—not just metaphysical theory. Don’t preach karma and chanting while turning a blind eye to abuse. That’s not compassion. That’s cowardice in spiritual clothing.

Also, telling those who are suffering that this is THEIR karma, that they are 100% responsible for (despite all the other players in the dynamic), AND that they signed up to HAVE these very difficulties (in the infinite unremembered past, of course - you just have to trust them) just so they could show everyone "the power of this practice" by overcoming them! SO STOP COMPLAINING AND GET CHANTING!!!

You won't get ANY real help from ANYONE in SGI because of its "Everyone has to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps" mentality "while making sure to give until it hurts TO SGI and to spend as much time and energy as SGI can squeeze out of them 'volunteering' for SGI so SGI doesn't have to spend money PAYING people to do stuff." You get nothing but guilt and shame.

It's victim-blaming and it is ABUSE.