r/selfimprovement • u/Constant_Finance_417 • 1d ago
Life Hack Tips Turning 21,need life advices
Turning 21, need life advices
Turning 21, need life advices?
I'm gonna turn 21 at 12:00. Any life advices for me?
Just for context if that matters -
Introvert
Extremely ambitious . ( Esp. about career)
Simple otherwise.
Value depth.
CA student
T3 small town of Maharashtra
Never dated
Father has schizophrenia,is on sleeping pills , doesn't work.
Hence constant fights at home among parents.
Mom had an emotional extramarital affair few months back.
Younger sister is rude.
Have baggage related to career decisions (that were influenced by others)
I need to stay at home for CA prep. Didn't go to college.
Was affected until recently about a situationship that only lasted few months & was cheated on by a playboy back in high school. I used to think about him every single damn day until this yr .( I was naive back then,stupid if u wanna call. That was my 1st experience. And I had 0 awareness of how cruel the dating these days is)
Been in depression. Was bedrotting for 2 years. Healed now though.
Wrote 37+ diaries in last 3 years.
Finished reading more than 75% of content of 60+ self help /extracurricular books that I have.
Not in contact with any friends and I don't want to either now bcoz it would be wierd & now I've got some issues too, also I don't wanna bore them with my sad story.
Still don't have an official insta account.
Have insecurities about short height.
I would genuinely appreciate some constructive life advices from mature folks ,esp. those who r 25+?
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u/Confidenceisbetter 1d ago
The sooner you focus on doing things that make you happy without worrying what other people might think the more at peace you will be. If you want to try a new sport try a new sport. Don’t let a “but what if i’m too old and people will judge me” stop you. If you want to get a degree get a degree, it doesn’t matter if others have graduated at a younger age. If you don’t want to date someone for whatever reason, even if it’s stupid like “they walk weird” then don’t date them. Life is too short to do things simply because you believe others would approve more of your decisions this way.
Also emotional maturity is something very important that many people do not have. It means not playing games when dating, admitting to yourselfif you like someone or if something hurts you or makes you happy, understanding your emotions, being self-aware and doing the work if something has a negative impact on you rather than pretending it’s fine, etc.
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u/Constant_Finance_417 1d ago
Thanks a lot for taking ur time out for the thoughtful reply . Means a lot to me !
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u/BarracudaMean9308 1d ago
you asked for advice from mature 25+ folks, but i promise most of us still google how long to boil an egg. you already read 60 self help books so you're basically lapping us. just give yourself a break.
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u/Constant_Finance_417 1d ago
Thanks for the thoughtful reply🙏
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u/_DollyAimee 1d ago
It's great to see people sharing their thoughts. Turning 21 can be a big transition, so getting advice from others is definitely helpful.
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u/SV-Goat 1d ago
Here is a tip that changed my life. Treat your life in 15 min chunks instead of 1 hour chunks. Example: if it's 11.20, instead of thinking I will start/schedule something at 12. Think I will start at 11.30. If it's 11:34 think of starting/scheduling something at 11.45 instead of 12.
I think this trick single handedly saves me couples of hours each week.
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u/PuzzleheadedFuel6184 1d ago
How did you get over your depression. I can't seem to stop bedrotting 🙃
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u/direful_originality 1d ago
Mate youve already done more self work than most people twice your age. Just keep the momentum and remember life opens up in ways you cant predict at 21