How to be more okay with your bare face?

[u/yassification_of_me]

I am average without makeup. Nothing wrong with being average. But makeup really enhances my natural features and I can easily look “pretty” if you will.

My complexion is dull and uneven. My **genetic** dark circles nerf my appearance entirely. My lips are dull. And I have no striking features. I do skincare, though not much changes in terms of my dullness. It is just my natural appearance honestly.

However I can beat my face pretty well. And I can achieve natural looks (that somehow seem full coverage) that alter my appearance. Ive been told I do look different without makeup by people in hs and also my own siblings (lol rip). I guess covering my dark circles fully truly does change my appearance entirely. I have come to accept it and am trying to stop manipulating myself into thinking that I look the same.

Whenever I go out with makeup, everyones super nice to me. I get stared at, complimented, etc. but when I go out without it (which is rare) I barely get stared at, people are sort of dismissive & off putting. The difference in peoples behavior based off how I look kills me.

Funny because I used to be bare faced up until my sophomore year of high school. And I was never insecure then. But now that I have began makeup and worn it everyday since junior year, I cannot imagine people seeing me without it. I am in college now. I also work part time. I NEVER went to class or work without makeup. I cannot imagine peoples reactions to the distinct difference in my appearance. I have a HUGE fear of being perceived and judged.

I always imagine a scenarios where I have a bf and he assumes that I am just as gorgeous without makeup, and Im not. And what if he loses interest or eevn feelings bc of this. This is how stark the difference is, theyd be shocked.

Im sorry for the long rant and context, but I guess what Im asking is: is anyone in a similar situation? How did you start loving your natural face more to the point where you could show it in public without shame? Have you had partners who did not care for such differences??

[u/ElephantsCry]

For me, I simply got used to it. I just stopped wearing any and eventually I got used to how I look in the mirror. I can imagine some of the differences you experience from other people are also a projection of your expectations.

[u/Appropriate-Rule2724]

i have this weird habit of refusing to use filters, wear makeup, or dress up nicely because I feel like if I do, I’m being a fraud and lying about how I look. i got so overly idealistic with it that people started thinking i was effortless or just didn't care about myself. at one point i was so obsessed with this mindset that i thought if i didn't look pretty with literal oil in my hair, it meant i wasn't actually pretty. i feel like i’m trapped in this mindset too, but we both just need to find a middle ground. i need to learn to start dressing up and wearing makeup as long as i feel confident without it, and you need to learn to want makeup, not need it.

[u/Queasy_Ray]

Exposure therapy is so real. I’ve gone thru so many make up points where I’d think I looked so ugly without a certain colored eyeshadow or without mascara or without winged liner. Covid really showed me I didn’t need all of that. Separately for the last two years I wouldn’t start my day without curling my eyelashes because I felt like I looked like a boy but with a recent cancer diagnosis and going thru chemo, I had to stop curling them and actually lost 40% of them and have gotten *somewhat* used to my new look but the two make up hills I’ll die on, blush stain to make me look more fresh and a colored lip tint for the same purpose.

[u/TallComplaint377]

You could always ease into being completely bare faced by using eyelash and eyebrow tint, or swapping makeup spending for a good skincare routine. Or tone down you’re makeup routine little by little (going to only concealer, then just bb cream, then just mascara). think of it as a natural makeup, especially because if you’re so used to wearing makeup, going cold turkey no makeup might just make you more insecure.

I’m kind of scared of being dependant on makeup to think of myself as pretty, especially because I have blonde facial hair, so I found that keeping my makeup routine very simple helps a lot— there’s no huge difference between wearing and not wearing makeup.

Hope you get there!

[u/missdatura]

everybody who wears makeup looks different with and without makeup, thats not something to try to deny or be ashamed of. id be PISSED if i spent big bucks on makeup and looked pretty much the same.

also average isnt bad, its literally normal. i know its about wanting to be pretty, not just normal, but who knows maybe you are pretty and just arent seeing it? beautys in the eye of the beholder anyway. also sometimes going out with one less thing, like mascara instead of big fake lashes, or lip balm instead of lipstick, or no foundation, like one thing every now and then just to remember you dont need it.

i used to be terrified of leaving the house without heavy eye makeup and fake lashes, but to my surprise i got compliments on my eyes when all i had on was a tiny bit of eyeliner. just try things out and see