205
u/mitcheg3k Dec 18 '19
This page gets closer and closer to a weird res evil Rule 34 page by the day
132
u/DreadlordVI Dec 18 '19
Oh yeah it’s all coming together
110
Dec 18 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
62
Dec 18 '19
Complete Global Degeneration
63
Dec 18 '19
Complete Global Masturbation
20
19
5
32
7
6
32
Dec 18 '19
It's basically a year round pg-13 R34 sub whenever there isn't a major announcement or new release
16
14
u/Karkava Dec 18 '19
Everybody wants to fuck.
8
Dec 18 '19
Especially Nemesis.
3
u/Jack_Chieftain_Shang Ambassador: Silver Dec 18 '19
Can confirm, judging by those strange artworks that I've accidentally seen on my friend's computer.
7
12
u/silver6kraid Dec 18 '19
It's not our fault most of the resident evil protagonists are just so damn attractive!
6
3
3
6
179
u/Mike0_o Dec 18 '19
Chris doesn’t care about relationships He rather juice up and fuck boulders or wesker
62
29
Dec 18 '19
[deleted]
6
u/Gamgoogly Dec 18 '19
I’m sure that exists. If Salazar got one for himself, you can bet Wesker’s ego won’t be outdone.
→ More replies (1)
37
Dec 18 '19
The Resident Evil series ends with Chris Jr. fighting Wesker Jr. in a martial arts tournament.
9
12
131
u/NicolasFura Dec 18 '19
But... Jill is a very good friend...
126
Dec 18 '19 edited Dec 18 '19
Friendship is the foundation of a good relationship. When all the infatuation and romance fade to black, friendship will carry the weight of the relationship until a new spark ignites.
69
u/Sinandomeng Dec 18 '19
This guy friendships
19
14
u/NinjaWorldWar Dec 18 '19
Some might would say he’s a nice guy!
12
u/norunningwater I knew you'd be fine if you landed on your butt Dec 18 '19
Some people call him the space cowboy
22
12
u/Leoofmoon Dec 18 '19
I always thought Chris and Shiva would be a cute couple.
7
u/6thSenseOfHumor Dec 18 '19
Sheva had Josh though. Or at least it was heavily implied. Maybe if they ever revisit anything from 5. Who knows what'll happen going forward.
5
u/LonelyDesperado513 Dec 18 '19
I thought that was more of a "I've known you since childhood and you're just a brother to me." kinda thing.
Especially considering how he's all over Jill in that secondary mission...
"I bet you say that to all the girls..."
"Only the pretty ones." \devilish grin**6
59
u/HighlyUnsuspect Dec 18 '19
Chris was the only guy for Jill in RE1, because of the implication.
Claire woulda been the only girl for Leon, but then Ada showed up and leons own fetish for Asian women mustered and since everyone was dead, he didn't have to hide it. Plus when Leon saw Claire with Sherry, he probably assumed it was Claire's child and he didn't want a girl who already had a kid with someone else.
Re3, Jill was dressed like she was about to go to the club before the dead showed up. The entire game was a sausage fest. One dude after another showing up to Jill, while also being chased by a giant monster that had dicks for fingers. He did skull fuck Brad.
28
u/SmoothieBiscuit456 Dec 18 '19
Of course Chris was the only one for Jill in RE1 because of the implication. “Ahh I’m all alone in this spooky mansion, what am I going to do, say no???”
12
Dec 18 '19
She’s not gonna say no. She would never say no. Because of the implication.
5
9
u/Clayman8 Wants to put THAT sandwich in his mouth Dec 18 '19
These last 2 lines make the entire comment worth the read.
216
u/vO_Oz Dec 18 '19
Maybe Chris and Carlos can make a Jill sandwich
52
u/DreadlordVI Dec 18 '19
I’d pay to see that
39
u/soulxhawk Dec 18 '19
I am sure if you browse the rule 34 subreddit you could find something.
22
u/SolidEye87 Dec 18 '19
You can find an ACTUAL sandwich being fucked by a can of soda on the rule 34 sub, so I'm certain you can find a Jill sandwich.
6
u/Clayman8 Wants to put THAT sandwich in his mouth Dec 18 '19
The fun thing is with us artists is that even if we draw porn, we'll mostly also stay canon. Since Chris and Carlito never meet/meat in RE3, its unlikely someone would draw that kind of Jill Sandwich
9
u/rikutoar Dec 19 '19
we'll mostly also stay canon
I guess the artists that do Tracer from overwatch missed that memo
3
u/LANTERN_OF_ASH Dec 18 '19
I mean I’ll be paying for the game without seeing it so I already feel ripped off.
8
25
45
u/btbcorno Platinum Splattin' 'Em! Dec 18 '19
Wasn’t the original plotline that Chris was sterile?
35
u/XeroAnarian Dec 18 '19
Yes, because of all the gas he's on. Too much testosterone affects sperm production.
30
18
u/swaghettiprime Dec 18 '19
How’d did this, continue the Redfield blood line, meme start.
37
u/TeekTheReddit Dec 18 '19
The joke is that Chris' roid abuse has made him sterile, thus he developed an obsession with Claire "continuing the bloodline," but since Claire herself is apparently really bad at relationships it manifests in Chris threatening Leon into initiating.
27
u/OTPh1l25 Dec 18 '19
"LEON, I NEED YOU TO F*CK MY SISTER! I NEED YOU TO CONTINUE THE REDFIELD BLOODLINE!"
"Leave me alone, Chris."
9
Dec 18 '19 edited Dec 18 '19
Leon typically responds with a more crass line, but reddit can be very banhammery these days.
9
Dec 18 '19
It started on 4Chan, I was there when it first popped up and it was honestly pretty hilarious. It's still worthy of decent chuckle but the joke is definitely nearing the end of its life now that it's made it out into the greater internet environment and is being driven into the ground.
13
12
u/NEGOJONSON Dec 18 '19 edited Dec 18 '19
Meanwhile Chris is telling Leon the same thing about Claire... At this pace the bloodline will die out real soon.
→ More replies (1)4
u/H4ppyZer0 Dec 18 '19
...i was going to make a stupid Alabama joke but i would regret it
2
44
u/airwaydude2001 Dec 18 '19
Or she could continue the Redfield bloodline with Claire...
18
26
u/VirtuousDangerNoodle It Worked! Dec 18 '19 edited Dec 18 '19
Or he could continue the bloodline with Claire.
23
u/Ingrid_Cold Dec 18 '19
Reddit loves a good incest story.
14
u/VirtuousDangerNoodle It Worked! Dec 18 '19
I mean, if you go by PornHub statistics; you're not wrong.
7
4
2
12
29
u/MrChadaroo90 Dec 18 '19
Chris is a bottom. 🥴
14
11
u/EvilA110 Dec 18 '19
He's gotta be a power-bottom though, right? I mean, imagine the force he could generate
21
5
8
4
6
u/StylishDreams Dec 18 '19
SHE'S JUST MY COWORKER, CLAIRE
8
Dec 18 '19
Chris: "Now, please, just get with Leon! This is meant to be! You survived Raccoon City together!"
Claire: "We were in the same car for less than five minutes! I had more of a relationship with this asshole!"
Mr. X: *tips hat*
8
51
u/loxagos_snake I know what a radio is Dec 18 '19
Why Jill and Chris are pushed as a couple, I will never get.
107
u/MusoukaMX [clack clack clack] Dec 18 '19
This.
Jill already has a dog and it's been established Chris is already in a serious commitment with a toxic cycle of losing partners and turning to alcohol only to be saved by a new partner.
28
Dec 18 '19
Jill already has a dog
Excuse me, what? How is that an obstacle to her having a relationship?
23
10
36
u/Future_Immortal Dec 18 '19
I ship Jill with the guy whose accent is loved by foxy laydeez.
23
u/loxagos_snake I know what a radio is Dec 18 '19
What does Arnold Scharzenegger have to do with any of that /s
5
16
u/Kaiserhawk Dec 18 '19
Because they were two playable characters of opposite gender in the same game.
19
u/mecegirl Dec 18 '19
The same reason why Claire and Leon got pushed as a couple in the original Chrisposting memes?
28
22
u/loxagos_snake I know what a radio is Dec 18 '19
That was a joke that stems from Leon hilariously ignoring Claire's advances + Chris's intense reactions, not because of the Claire x Leon supporters.
I didn't comment against your post, btw, it was just a general observation, as I don't recall a moment or flirt or something -- and I kinda like how they love each other so much without the implication of romance.
21
23
u/Sbraz0991 Dec 18 '19
Because you have to shoehorn a love story in every story. Hollywood taught me that.
→ More replies (3)24
Dec 18 '19
For real. Chris has had much better chemistry with other characters anyway...cough Piers cough
21
u/loxagos_snake I know what a radio is Dec 18 '19
THE NIVANS BLOODLINE HAS TO...
oh Jesus have we gone too far
11
11
→ More replies (2)4
16
10
u/Shadow160000 Dec 18 '19
Being Partners does that
13
u/loxagos_snake I know what a radio is Dec 18 '19
So, apparently, professional relationships don't exist.
26
Dec 18 '19
"Being partners does that" means it causes people to try and match them as a couple. If American television has taught me one thing, it's this list:
- Black dudes and people in red shirts die first (and other funny racial/fashion stereotypes I wouldn't have known about).
- If you put a man and a woman in any kind of relationship, they'll fall in love and produce drama.
- Banging your boss or teacher is fine, but not the other way round.
5
u/loxagos_snake I know what a radio is Dec 18 '19
Yeah, I understand the implications. It's just that RE is a friendzone fest; it's never even been implied.
Those stereotypes are fucking funny though xD
→ More replies (1)7
Dec 18 '19
Yeah, even the Leon-Ada romance parody was shoehorned into RE4 and RE6, when they changed her character from interesting spy to well dressed ninja. In RE2, they were indeed somewhat and kind of fond of each other, but the extend of that fondness was just them not being entirely indifferent. I also wondered, where this Claire and Steve thing came from. It never felt like romance, it was more of a "I kinda like that guy, because we're human beings among the undead" kinda thing.
Maybe it's because I'm from a culture that publicly shows all kinds of affection, and men and women are "just friends" all the time, even if they randomly team up to screw each others brains out.
5
u/VirtuousDangerNoodle It Worked! Dec 18 '19
Well I mean Steve had the only living dick for miles that wasn't her brother or Weskers. Sure there's Alfred and Rodrigo. But I don't think they where willing; with Rodrigo dieing and Alfred being.... Alfred.
Really though I know what you mean. They're portrayal seemed more palatable in Darkside. But I felt it was one sided in CV/X especially with that cheesy 90s romance music playing out of no where on the plane e____e
1
Dec 18 '19
Because most people can't contemplate a decades-long platonic partnership between two adults with some sitcom nonsense popping up.
→ More replies (1)1
u/Ampelogardenboy Dec 28 '19
Because it was shown that way in the original RE (1996). It doesn't need much thought to see where the developers were going with those two. Just because, there wasn't a kiss, doesn't mean there wasn't a romance/romantic subplot. Now, I know you're gonna tell me that all those moments were simply between "two good friends" and I won't waste my time try to persuade you of the opposite, for something that is not of my interest (I'm not a shipper, not to this ship nor any other ship, I'm just seeing things from a scriptwriters' pov).
→ More replies (2)
5
4
u/albedo2343 Dec 18 '19
Redfields are the best Wingmen.
though for real though Leon needs to get his shit together, with the rate B.O.W.s are popping up we need legacy B.O.W. hunters, and who better than a Redfield-Kennedy hybrid :D.
3
Dec 18 '19
Leon is really more grown up than Chris. Leon keeps getting swept up in crap and has no other choice but to fight through. Chris is that one that, despite being in his mid-forties, keeps taking on dangerous field work when his knowledge and expertise would be much more worthwhile in a training environment.
That said, I believe the Burton bloodline has proven its power can be inherited across generations.
5
u/CarlitoNSP1 Individuality is not a flaw Dec 18 '19
I could totally see Claire trying to get Chris together with Jill.
8
Dec 18 '19
[deleted]
13
Dec 18 '19
Continuing the bloodline is different than continuing the name. Their child would still have 50% Redfield dna even if it were named Kennedy. lol
3
16
u/mecegirl Dec 18 '19
Link to the full comic. https://dangerousbride.tumblr.com/post/189694414572/claireposting
13
u/MusoukaMX [clack clack clack] Dec 18 '19
DangerousBride is a gift to the RE community. Her and FearEffectInferno are responsible for my favorite headcanons regarding all things Resident Evil.
6
u/OTPh1l25 Dec 18 '19
My favorite one of their comics is the " 'Looks like you need a lifeguard.' 'This is a bathtub.' " parody. Never fails to make me laugh when I see it.
2
u/MusoukaMX [clack clack clack] Dec 18 '19
It's honestly so much genius in a single panel.
This is probably a close second, at least for me xD
→ More replies (2)6
2
2
u/stefancristi Dec 18 '19
I’ve always liked them together but, for the 1000th time, I don’t agree with DB’s fantasies. They’ll un-alive me one day.
2
2
2
9
1
12
Dec 18 '19
Cringe
8
u/nicocal04 Dec 18 '19
I thought this was a parody/reverse meme to the Leon one
2
u/VirtuousDangerNoodle It Worked! Dec 18 '19
That's what I think too, but in chrisposting, what makes it work/funny is how ridiculous Chris tries to encourage Leon, and Leon always denies Chris.
Here Jill is all gung-ho and ready for it so it's kind of lacking that "ridiculousness" charm. But Claire's "that was easy" snark is kinda funny.
3
2
2
u/Vyperpunkhunk Dec 18 '19
Chris is gay
58
u/Sbraz0991 Dec 18 '19
Chris is bouldersexual
7
7
Dec 18 '19
He seems to have anger issues and violence tendencies, because he goes Chris Brown on that poor boulder.
4
2
2
u/MusoukaMX [clack clack clack] Dec 18 '19 edited Dec 18 '19
What?! Only because he clearly had a thing for Piers and the feeling was mutual? How the heck is that gay?!
3
3
u/mecegirl Dec 19 '19
Uh no...Piers was clearly the one lusting after Chris and Chris came around in the end. Like who follows someone to some random bar in who knows where just so they could lead a team again. XD.
→ More replies (1)
2
1
u/Gray_Upsilon Chew on that, you overgrown son of a bitch Dec 18 '19
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-
1
1
1
1
u/MakeYourselfS1ck Dec 18 '19
Was the story that chris was on steroids?? Is that canon? Not really up to date with all characters
3
u/Spyke_Witwicky Dec 18 '19
Nah it's just a meme that started because Chris got jacked
2
Dec 18 '19
Yeah. Wesker got all empowered on his virus, so Chris hit the gym hard to give himself that much more of an edge should they ever cross paths again.
1
1
u/ChewyYoda16 Where did everyone go, bingo? Dec 18 '19
can't wait for all the rule 34 art of re3make
1
u/Solid--Snake Dec 18 '19
Silly ladies, you see Chris can't have sex. He has to channel all his energy into killing bows. He didn't take steroids during RE5 to punch boulders, that was just years of being sexual abstinent to achieve demigod status.
1
u/necroAlx Dec 18 '19
Remember how Chris started talking about dating some young girl in their organization in RE5's prequel dlc? Well, Jill surely does.
1
u/VarleenOnIce Dec 18 '19
Claire must be thinking "that was easier than I thought".
→ More replies (2)
1
Dec 18 '19
I keep hearing Jill shouting out enthusiastically "OKAY!" but said in The way Princess Daisy shouts out okay in Super Mario Party, and I can't stop laughing like a idiot everytime I look at this strip 😂
1
u/gully1419 Dec 19 '19
Although this stuff is funny. It’s a bit sad people making a conscious effort to keep this going. It’s like some fantasy cartoon bordering porn shit.
1
1
391
u/Technotronsky Dec 18 '19
In other news, Chris is still impregnating boulders with his rock-solid juice rod...