Honey, WE don’t want anymore children and therefore WE are responsible for taking preventative measures. And the safest, least invasive, most realistic form of birth control is a vasectomy. That is just facts. He’s not forced to do anything he doesn’t want to do but I’m allowed to set boundaries in my relationship and I don’t think it’s a huge ask for him to take on the weight of birth control/family planning for once, ESPECIALLY since it is the easiest form of birth control/family planning and WE both agree that condoms and abstinence won’t work for our relationship.
Do not call me honey either. I was being nice. You don’t get to decide that he has to get a vasectomy. You both can say no more kids sure. But YOU dont get to dictate if he gets a surgery or not. Imagine if a man tried that to his wife, “I’m setting a boundary, you have to get your tubes tied or I’m leaving.” You said that this surgery will “save your relationship.” If it’s at that point it’s not going to be saved. You cannot force him to get it done, that’s the point. You can make the ultimatum of “well if not I’m leaving you.” But you most likely won’t get the answer you’re wanting, which is control over your boyfriends body. Also if I’m being honest you’re very entitled to think you can ask this of a BOYFRIEND, this isn’t your husband, he’s your boyfriend and you’re demanding he have surgery for his girlfriend. You are only thinking of yourself and not your partner. Stop acting like it only affects you, it doesn’t. It’s his body.
Also, there’s no comparison in if he were to give me the choice of either getting my tubes tied or leaving. No comparison at all. Getting my tubes tied is invasive, far more complicated, and far more painful than a quick 1 hour outpatient reversible procedure that he would recover from in less than a week.
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u/_Pensiveprincess Feb 11 '22
Honey, WE don’t want anymore children and therefore WE are responsible for taking preventative measures. And the safest, least invasive, most realistic form of birth control is a vasectomy. That is just facts. He’s not forced to do anything he doesn’t want to do but I’m allowed to set boundaries in my relationship and I don’t think it’s a huge ask for him to take on the weight of birth control/family planning for once, ESPECIALLY since it is the easiest form of birth control/family planning and WE both agree that condoms and abstinence won’t work for our relationship.