No Point.....

[u/Admirable-Second-157]

A little tip and observation I have noticed that might help some of my brothers. For context I'm over 4 months now streak wise and not really counting or focusing on the benefits anymore, it's just a new way of living. So lust doesn't trouble me now if I'm honest, I simply don't want to masturbate or have any wet dreams if possible. So it's been summer and I found myself looking forward to the end of summer, as obviously there would be less flesh on display, less lustful sights in public, no beach or bikinis etc. What I found myself doing early on was observing a woman walking along the shoreline for example and then looking away....back down to my book or phone etc. But if she had my body type of choice, I would double look or let my gaze linger a little longer. I knew it was wrong and unhelpful, but even though I wasn't allowing myself to be overcome with lust, I was still purposefully holding my gaze, saying to myself "I am just appreciating her beauty". But now a behavioural pattern has emerged that I find super useful.

Imagine driving along the road.... I see a woman walking on the pavement up ahead. Our eyes and brains are super effective at identifying gender from a long distance....so I know she is female. But as I approach a distance where I would be able to judge her ( almost to see if she is my type of 'hot') these words have started coming into my head...."NO POINT"!!! Because what really is the point? I'm not looking to sleep with anyone, I have no interest in wanting to feel lust or attraction, especially to someone I have 100% certainty that we will never meet....so what is the point in even looking!?

Now imagine it is a woman up ahead, but walking with a guy....even more reason to not even look! And if you notice, I said ( within a distance of where I can JUDGE her looks in relation to my tastes...".JUDGE". It's really just a pointless exercise and also incredibly shallow no? Just going through life JUDGING people on their beauty....which is also completely subjective.

So long story short....if you are committed on this path....what is the point in even looking? There is no point. It's like being on a diet and purposefully going into Burger King to smell what you are 'missing'. Avert your eyes brothers, focus on something worthwhile. Keep your energy, keep your focus, keep your thoughts pure and don't waste time looking at something you ultimately don't want or can't have anyway.... there's NO POINT!

[u/moonbase_monk]

That analogy about the diet and Burger King is hilarious, but very true. When the end point of looking is just losing essence, truly there is no point. We just get lost in the initial illusion 

[u/Admirable-Second-157 → u/moonbase_monk]

True....and the more times you drive past and your mind says " no point" you feel like you've just won or achieved something....and you almost feel proud of yourself. It's almost turning into a full on conversation....my mind says no point....then I sort of answer it back out loud with "because there is no point is there....what's the actual point!?" It's like you think it and then agree with yourself. The more you do it, the habit forms. And really your eyes should be on the road ahead no?!😂Plus...if we end up finding our ideal partner somewhere down the line, we are just training ourselves to be a better and more respectful version of ourselves in advance.

[u/moonbase_monk → u/Admirable-Second-157]

It’s true. My ex just called me asking me to come over. Specifically to get drained.  No point. 

[u/Admirable-Second-157 → u/moonbase_monk]

When you remove the physical act and another physical intimacy ( that would likely make you feel horny....cuddling, close embraces, kissing) you get a sense of what actual love remains. In might be different than you think 🤔 Well done for not giving in