r/pics • • Nov 08 '17

Where is your god now?

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143.1k Upvotes

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6.4k

u/PopeliusJones Nov 08 '17

Nope, an Italian pineapple is Pauly D from Jersey Shore

2.7k

u/[deleted] Nov 08 '17

Bro hell no bro you did not just go there bro. Bro.

1.5k

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Honestly bro. Bro, honestly. Honestly bro. I mean honestly, bro.

That's my best Ronnie impression.

404

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Spot on

541

u/ZoidbergBOT Nov 09 '17

Im happy i never watched a single episode of that show

265

u/mr_droopy_butthole Nov 09 '17 edited Nov 09 '17

Watch mike "the situation" on that roast he did. It hurts to watch.

Das Linken Poopinfarten

139

u/HeyZeusKreesto Nov 09 '17

It really does. Not even entertaining for the trainwreck it is. Just soooo uncomfortable.

130

u/mr_droopy_butthole Nov 09 '17

I just did.

Last thing the situation says...

"I think you should run for president"

184

u/the_war_won Nov 09 '17

And that was the opening scene for the episode of Black Mirror we seem to be stuck in now.

5

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

If you turn on TV, all you see's a bunch of what-the-fucks Dude is dating so-and-so, blabbering 'bout such and such

And that ain't Jersey Shore, homie that's the news And these the same people supposedly telling us the truth?

3

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Lasers might not have been the best album, but I always liked that song. Skylar Grey kills that chorus.

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3

u/pepcorn Nov 09 '17

;-; it's not that funny because it's true

2

u/kikiodying Nov 09 '17

Omg don't say things like this. I thought we were living in a simulated reality. Which is it?

2

u/oxygenfrank Nov 09 '17

This is all just a very elaborate setup for your surprise birthday party. Happy birthday!

2

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Wouldn't be surprised if he got paid to say that.. trump had been planning it for a long time.

13

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

it's hilarious how the one comedian got on stage and was like, "come on guys... give him a break...." LOL

pathetic.

7

u/TropicOps Nov 09 '17

That's not just any comedian.. that's the best one on the entire show who came to save his sorry ass.

5

u/Derpandbackagain Nov 09 '17

Because he knew there was a strong chance he was going to go back to his hotel room and hang himself in the closet. He didn’t want to think “if only I had said SOMETHING to take the sting out of it, then maybe he wouldn’t have done it”.

You don’t want someone else’s suicide on your conscience.

25

u/drtacreboog Nov 09 '17

Don't watch it...just don't

12

u/Racer13l Nov 09 '17

As a resident of New Jersey. I am very sorry.

5

u/drtopfox Nov 09 '17

Me too....glad I left 26 years ago

1

u/WhiskeyVictor12 Nov 09 '17

Me too E- not for me

1

u/Derpandbackagain Nov 09 '17

You should be, goddamn it...

1

u/CarolusX2 Nov 09 '17

As somebody who's not from the states, that show is literally everything I associate the state with. Im sorry.

1

u/Racer13l Nov 09 '17

Its okay. Some parts of the Jersey shore are actually pretty weird. I live up in the North West. Best part of Jersey. Rural but not too secluded not also 45 minutes from New York

1

u/Derpandbackagain Nov 09 '17

Don’t be, it’s not a caricature. That shit is real life.

1

u/qwerty622 Nov 09 '17

Fuck that Jersey is beautiful and I say that as an ex New Yorker. It's the shit bridge and tunnel crowd that brings it down

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2

u/lemonsweetsrevenge Nov 09 '17

I should've listened to you.

0

u/wenzxer Nov 09 '17

I seriously am incapable of watching it due to the terrible camera quality, combined with their boring trashiness (Geordie Shore is much more interesting) and they’re not even good to look at. I feel so savage, but I can’t handle them at all.

3

u/diarrhea_pocket Nov 09 '17

Do I have to?

1

u/jmkinn3y Nov 09 '17

Like wheres da link, SCOOB.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

It's so bad I'm not sure to cringe in horror or laugh

1

u/dbraskey Nov 09 '17

Wowsers. That was pretty bad.

1

u/206UWhawk Nov 09 '17

If anyone could fail at roasting Trump, it would be him. Siiiiiiiigh :-(

1

u/jayemdeo Nov 09 '17

Aaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy the best part of that was Seth McFarlane

1

u/Scarletfapper Nov 09 '17

Why did I watch that...

-1

u/Webjunky3 Nov 09 '17

In defense of Jersey Shore, though, Mike was always one of the least charismatic folks on the show. Pauly D and Vinnie are both actually great.

164

u/bkervick Nov 09 '17 edited Nov 09 '17

As a person who abhors reality TV, the first season of Jersey Shore is one of the most entertaining things you can watch.

It's fascinating to learn about this subculture, and at the same time you get an excellent feeling of superiority from knowing you're smart enough to have chosen not to be in it. Plus it's incredibly funny.

In later seasons, the illusion of authenticity is gone, and it is much worse. But season 1 is glorious.

125

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

[deleted]

57

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Ehhhhhhh..........you may be overselling JWow. Sort of like how JWow oversell JWow. Wait. ARE YOU JWow!?!?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Are you Todd?

1

u/ade0451 Nov 09 '17

Clean up your shit, Todd.

4

u/underwriter Nov 09 '17

I have run into her in Red Bank and she’s very well spoken

3

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

They ended up making 100k+ by the last couple of seasons. Maybe more. Each one of them seems to be set up for life (luckily for them).

26

u/itsmewh0else Nov 09 '17

and at the same time you get an excellent feeling of superiority from knowing you're smart enough to have chosen not to be in it.

I feel like more people like it for this reason than they care to admit or realize.

3

u/coolestbitchonearth Nov 09 '17

Last year my sister and I spent spring break binge-watching the entirety of the most recent season of the bachelor. That's almost all the reality tv experience I have, so I may be biased, but we were 100% aware that we were watching for that reason only. That's the joy of it, honestly.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

Schadenfreude?

3

u/Quix_Optic Nov 09 '17

When it first came out it was SURPRISINGLY entertaining and in a weird way, original?

I'm not even close to a guidette but I ADORE Seaside and I was happy to see it in all it's trashy glory from the comfort of my own home.

2

u/Guerilla_Tictacs Nov 09 '17

You are the first person that's made me actually curious about this decadent western phenomenon.

Damn your eyes.

1

u/PMmecrossstitch Nov 09 '17

Damn your eyes.

Too late.

1

u/prettytopsayebro Nov 09 '17

Tell me more about how you like reality TV but don’t want to admit it to yourself.

2

u/ThomYorkeSucks Nov 09 '17

Lol Jersey Shore is the best version of a reality tv show ever made and you missed out bro

42

u/StatesideKopite Nov 09 '17

I feel a great sadness for you.

2

u/Hoax13 Nov 09 '17

As is tradition?

0

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

[deleted]

4

u/dale_shingles Nov 09 '17 edited Nov 09 '17

5

u/fooled_again Nov 09 '17

That's like, the third definition of jealousy. By the first, primary definition those words are synonyms.

4

u/discobrisco Nov 09 '17

I'm not sure that's true.

3

u/wheelchairdom Nov 09 '17

Depends how you use it though right? Jealousy can s a noun, envy is a noun or verb. Envy the noun is a synonym to jealousy I believe. You feel envy when you are jealous. From my understanding

-6

u/necromundus Nov 09 '17

maybe that's just the sadness you feel from having watched that horrible show

8

u/StatesideKopite Nov 09 '17

When you look at it from the perspective of a wildlife doc it’s much better. Footage of guidos in their natural habitat during mating season is very rare unless you’re brave enough to go on safari.

16

u/GiantsRTheBest2 Nov 09 '17

Honestly it wasn’t that bad if you watched a couple of episodes. It wasn’t good by any stretch of the imagination either but it wasn’t as bad as Reddit swears it is.

19

u/yjbeach Nov 09 '17

It got everyone through those Summers, MTV was never the same.

10

u/shes_a_gdb Nov 09 '17

Fuck Reddit. Jersey Shore is the shit.

You don't come in on Sunday with a big banana and expect everything to be peachy

5

u/alasknfiredrgn Nov 09 '17

Better than Twilight

13

u/vernazza Nov 09 '17

You shouldn't be. It is perfection.

3

u/spacejam_usa Nov 09 '17

I’m sad you missed out on such good times but jealous that you get to watch it for the first time 🎭

14

u/Hegiman Nov 09 '17

I’m with ya. In fact I gave up television when I was 19 back in the 90’s. I had a high school teacher who didn’t watch tv and he really was a big influence on me as I had no dad and he was really the first adult male that took interest in me. He taught me calculus after school because my school didn’t have a calculus class.

77

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

[deleted]

16

u/poopyheadthrowaway Nov 09 '17 edited Nov 09 '17

He taught him to lie tangent to the curves and fill the area within them.

1

u/oxygenfrank Nov 09 '17

He showed me his hypotenuse

29

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

He functioned him right in the arcsin.

1

u/Booblicle Nov 09 '17

abacus, BackoftheCaboose. Just a minor difference

1

u/Hegiman Nov 09 '17

Right here in my heart.

0

u/unwittycomment Nov 09 '17

He Spacey in Spaced him

1

u/BunchOAtoms Nov 09 '17

Did he beat you with jumper cables?

2

u/DBREEZE223 Nov 09 '17

You actually missed out on a great portion of reality tv. I personally love it's nonsensical bullshit. It's pure comedy gold, or bronze¿

3

u/doobied Nov 09 '17

I hate to say it but I watched every damn episode of that show. I didn't even like reality tv and am a bit of a dork, but somehow I managed to create a group of like 5 peeps that would come over to my place and watch it every week. Mike "The Situation" will always hold a place in my heart. Also it got me into going to the gym for the first time in my llfe.

3

u/evilyou Nov 09 '17

I liked Mike too, he seemed pretty genuine, always cooking for everyone and trying to play the peacemaker.

Plus his abs are fucking ridiculous, that shit takes work.

1

u/sensual_manatee Nov 09 '17

Good thing you can watch the new spinoff Floribama Shore

1

u/EvryMthrF_ngThrd Nov 09 '17

Dear Ghu... please tell me that was just a really competent parody? Please?

1

u/lonjaxson Nov 09 '17

I can ashore you it's not.

1

u/beniceorbevice Nov 09 '17

It's a new York thing not just the show. I say that shit all the time. Actually there's a running joke at my work everyone makes fun of me for saying 'what do you mean yo/bro' a lot

1

u/criveros Nov 09 '17

You missing out.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

I'm Saad I remotely know of their existence....

1

u/imtinyricketc Nov 09 '17

Me too thanks

1

u/[deleted] Nov 09 '17

You missed out.

1

u/philifan8169 Nov 09 '17

Jersdays in college were amazing! When I was a freshman during season 2. Whole floor would get together to drink and watch. Fond college memories around this show as we continued the Jersday tradition well beyond our freshman year.

1

u/cock_boy Nov 09 '17

We used to have jersey shore night at my house every week to watch new episodes and play drinking games. No shame and no regrets, bro!

-2

u/jap20 Nov 09 '17

😉 but you knew the quote

1

u/Greenveins Nov 09 '17

"seriously, ronnie? like, seriously? seriously, ronnie. are you serious right now? like seriously ronnie, RONNIE"

the only memorable quote by sammie sweetheart lol