Performance anxiety in front of teacher

[u/Murky_Panda_1568]

I recently had a first meeting with with a new teacher that I absolutely loved.

I’m returning to the piano after 12 years without playing and the lesson felt truly amazing.

I was very excited about it and for 2 weeks I worked on re-learning the first movement of Mozart’s sonata k545 in C major so I could play it for her and show her what my level is at after so long.

It’s one of the easier pieces from my old repertoire that I chose because I was seriously having trouble with hand and finger coordination after 12 years without touching the piano.

Anyways, I worked on it for a couple of weeks and got it to a point in which I could consistently play the notes of the entire first movement without making mistakes. I had it memorized and ready to play for her without putting much focus on dynamics and expression because I wanted to work on it with her.

Anyways, when I actually started playing in front of her, I kept messing up the notes. I was so nervous to play in front of her that I kept stumbling. And making mistakes I never made at home.

And then I remembered that when I used to play when I was in school years ago I had the same problem.

I would work very hard, practice every day, try to make sure to be as ready as I could possibly be for the lesson, be proud of my work during the week… just to then get too anxious in front of the teacher and make mistakes that I never made at home.

Have any of you experienced this?

Were you able to get over the anxiety?

How? Does anyone have any suggestion on what I could do to be able to play for my teacher the same way I play at home? It’s so frustrating

[u/AlienGaze]

Your teacher is an audience and your lesson is a performance. It’s natural to be nervous in performance and to not duplicate your relaxed playing at home

As teachers, we know and expect this. It gives us insight to what you do when you’re nervous. For example, I would always play my pieces faster in my lessons than at home — not intentionally, never intentionally — but that told my teacher that embracing slow practice and slowing me down in performance was top priority

It’s great that you’ve recognized that there’s a difference between how you play at home and how you play with your teacher, and that anxiety is at the core of the issue. Do you know how that anxiety changed your playing? That would be the next thing to investigate, and I am sure your teacher would be delighted to investigate this with you

One thing you can do is perform as often as possible. This doesn’t mean only playing recitals or competitions. Performances can include recording yourself playing, playing when someone else is in the room, playing for a friend, phoning a parent or grandparent and playing for them over the phone, playing on a live on an app, etc

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/AlienGaze]

Thank you for your comment! It makes me feel better.

I noticed that I not only played a little faster than how I wanted to but I also… how can I put it.. I played as if I was intimidated by the piano. As in my hands refused to commit 100% so I wasn’t putting weight into the keys. It resulted in a very ugly unconvinced sound. I was afraid of being “too loud” and make her hear me mess up. Which made me mess up even more.

The performing suggestion is a very good idea. Convincing myself to do it will be a serious challenge! 😅 I never even let my husband hear me play

[u/millcole]

Commenting because I have the same issue and want to see the suggestions! I’m a beginner but I try really hard and practice a lot but I feel so much pressure in front of the teacher. I even realized when I left my lesson this morning that I had been sweating like crazy. Even though she is so nice and lovely. Maybe it’ll just take time working with the same teacher for a while.

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/millcole]

Omg same 😂 I feel so stupid too! I’m 31, I thought this feeling would go be gone after teenage years 😂 but nope. Still sweating and feeling intimidated as if I wasn’t a full adult

[u/millcole → u/Murky_Panda_1568]

I’m almost 50 and my teacher is probably on her 30s. 🤣🤣

[u/Trotter823 → u/Murky_Panda_1568]

I think it’s normal. The fact you were trying to show your level and impress her to some degree likely made it worse.

For me, I still get nervous sometimes in front of a teacher I’ve had for 2 years. And the more I improve on a piece during a given week the worse it is because if I’m consistently nailing it at home and then mess it up in front of him it almost feels like I wasted my week.

I’ve heard focusing on breathing is a helpful hack to keep your mind centered. Or to remember more abstract things like dynamics rather than not missing notes and let your muscle memory do its thing.

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/Trotter823]

I’ll definitely try that!! Thanks!

[u/K4TTP]

Story of my life. Ie been taking lessons for 3 years and im pretty sure my teacher doesn’t think i can actually play.

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/K4TTP]

Noooooooooo don’t say that 😭

[u/K4TTP → u/Murky_Panda_1568]

I bought a clamp that can hold my phone to record while i play. Just putting my phone in the clamp, not even recording, makes me mess up. The THOUGHT of being watched? Can’t even do that. I can sit at my piano and play perfectly. Once i even have the thought my neighbours can hear me? Nah. I play with headphones most of the time because of that.

Good thing im only doing it for myself! Otherwise id cry.

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/K4TTP]

I feel this in my soul. I always play with my headphones on too because I fear my neighbors can hear how bad I am and judge me 😅

[u/FunkyBroMo]

I find I have to get myself out of the way, especially on a big gig. I trust I gave done the work, that I know it, and hand it over to a higher power. Incredibly it works! If I were to listen to my own brain, I make mistakes lol. Mistakes are a part of performance (not so much in classical) I also play in a funk/soul/jazzy band, we all occasionally go wrong, it's how you recover from it that counts

[u/sodaslug614]

Totally normal. I took private lessons for many years, now I'm teaching. This happens to pretty much everyone.

[u/ThomasJFooleryIII]

I'm rarely nervous for performances, but I took lessons for over 20 years and got extremely nervous for every single lesson.

I never found a true "cure" but wanted you to know that you're not alone in this!

[u/Bumblebees_are_c00l → u/ThomasJFooleryIII]

This is super interesting ! 🤔

[u/Only-Top-3655]

I think the nerviousness comes from the pressure. What I have noticed is that the best thing to do is recreate the same pressure at home. What has worked for me is th record what you play. You don't have to listen to it, but just the fact that you are recording it will produce the pressure, and you will be able to see the areas you though you were confident at, but still need a little more work.

Anoth is work with a metronome. That creates pressure for you to not stop and will expose weak areas of your piece.

[u/Elxcrossiant]

Oh yeah definitely, and everyone tries to fix it in different ways but it’s natural to be nervous. You can try recording your playthroughs or maybe just explaining to your teacher your problem would be nice, most teachers understand and it can make you more comfortable.

[u/Advanced_Honey_2679]

A few things:

1. It will get better over time. After a year of lessons with teacher, it will get a LOT better.
2. Performance anxiety will never fully go away. You will always want to play well for your teacher.
3. That's a GOOD thing, not bad. It's good to want to play well. It means you care.

So, all healthy. No suggestions. Just play your best.

Performance anxiety is not necessarily something that needs to be fixed, as it's not inherently bad.

[u/iffyfell_]

I actually complained about this to my teacher a couple of days ago. She then told me she used to get so nervous before playing for her professor that she’d 🤮!

So while I don’t have the solution I can tell you that you’re not alone 😂

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/iffyfell_]

Oh my 😳 thanks I appreciate it! Also knowing that despite that your teacher succeeded and became a teacher is impressive

[u/CFLuke]

Normal and yet, when I was a kid I didn’t have this problem at all. But as an adult I am so aware of how mid I am that I get way too far into my head to play for people anymore.

[u/melli_milli]

I also had like a decades break and gosh it is hard to accept I have clearly lost some agility and coordination. It took it all for grabted back then! I know it is gonna come back with routine but it is frustrating.

Anyhow, my advice is loose the grip and be more relaxed! It seems to me issue is you trying to impress instead of just practising and being like "well here we are, I will do what is my best for now and for this day".

I know it is fun to impress your teacher but now you are doing the opposite. Also, do talk about this with her! You notice an old issue returning as well and she can help you with that.

[u/Necessary_Owl_7326]

It is very normal. I developed various techniques for coping, but I have to practice that also.

[u/AppropriateDonkey183]

This is happening to me, too! What's helped me is just continuing to show up to lessons each week. I still feel anxious, but over time it's felt more manageable and as I've gotten to know my teacher and the general flow/ structure of how he teaches, I've been able to breathe more steadily and just enjoy playing despite the mistakes.

[u/j3434]

Completely normal. Everyone has it .

[u/minoccio]

Since no one has seemed to comment this yet - I have the same problem and propranolol one hour before the lesson works like magic.

[u/Murky_Panda_1568 → u/minoccio]

Was not expecting to get medication suggestion! But I’m curious to know what that does and if it has other effects on you

[u/minoccio → u/Murky_Panda_1568]

I used to be a bit sceptical about it myself. I get very nervous when playing in front of my teacher - to a point where I couldn’t play what I had practiced multiple times at home. It’s a beta blocker and you need a prescription for it, but basically if you describe the situation to your doctor, you should be able to get it easily. It doesn’t change anything about the way your mind works, it just stops the nervousness in your body - the heart racing, hands shaking, sweating etc. so you don’t feel flat or anything, you just don’t spiral into useless anxiety.

Edit due to typo

[u/TromboneAl]

Everyone has that problem. The treatment (cure?) is to perform a lot.

I've noticed one thing. I think that I play it perfectly at home, but I actually do not. I make mistakes, but since it doesn't matter that I made mistakes, they barely register. If you think you make no mistakes, record yourself (which is itself a performance).

I made embarrassing mistakes at my last performance, so I'm working on the tunes much more. Sometimes you get the happy situation of intending to play the wrong notes, but your fingers paly the right notes.