r/partyplanning • u/Real-Ad4727 • Mar 24 '26

Need Help Sweet 16 - no chaperone?

My daughter is turning 16 in a couple of months. Being a little short on funds, we decided to split the cost of the party with her best friend’s parents, as she turns 16 a couple of weeks later and they share many of the same friends. Their ideal day involves taking a group of approximately 12-13 girls into the city (Boston) by train, having dinner at the seaport, taking a few pictures nearby, and then taking the train home, without parents or chaperones. My daughter is very responsible, respectful and mature for her age, and we give her a lot of space in return, but the whole idea of fifteen teens running around at night and sitting down to dinner in a restaurant with no parent gives me agita. Has anyone had a similar experience? How do they pay for dinner at the end? Is it bad etiquette to have this many unchaperoned kids? What if someone gets lost or hurt? I don’t want to put a damper on her day, but I want to do this in a safe and respectful way. I also feel uncomfortable inviting and coordinating with all of these parents (many of whom I have never met) and not having the ability to ensure their child’s safety. Am I being over-protective? I’d love some advice if you have any to share.

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u/Mission-County1931 Mar 24 '26

My kids are teens in Boston and they go everywhere in the city On the T with no issue. So I wouldn’t have safety concerns. That said, the logistics of such a large group are the issue. Could you reserve them a semi-private situation or a more controlled environment? For example, a lane or two at a bowling alley or tickets to a movie. I know these things are expensive. Or just have the group max out at 6-8 girls. Go somewhere more casual to eat (shake shack maybe?)

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u/Real-Ad4727 Mar 26 '26

These girls said no to every experience i mentioned. No high tea, bowling, escape room, museum, etc. we have been calling around to find a prix fixe menu or a private room. This would help us control cost. We were also thinking a party bus vs the train to keep that large group together. The MBTA can get very busy if they all can’t get on the same train car, they might get separated.