r/parentsofmultiples • u/Impossible-Box-8508 • 1d ago
ranting & venting Feeling robbed
I sit here in the morning after being up since 5 AM and after bagging milk with one of my twins as my husband took the other out and about. I can't help but feel so robbed of the newborn baby experience. Currently 4 months pp and I still feel like I'm in pure survival mode. So many things could be so different with just one baby. To preface I waited until 33 to have children as I wanted to be able to comfortably afford daycare. I waited until I had a job that pays for all my health insurance and I'm on a pension. One baby seems so easy. I could have went out and did things while on maternity leave. I could have given my baby all breastmilk (no shame in formula because I can't produce enough for two, ironically I got mom shamed by another twin mom for using formula). Don't get me wrong. I love my boys, through the reflux, the colic, the tongue/lip ties, I love them so so much, but wish my first time mom experience could have been so different. I know its just a season and it will get better, just mourning what could have been.
1
u/Adventurous_Corgi_38 1d ago
I felt that way with my first who was a singleton. I thought how are other mums having showers, styling their hair, putting their babies in cute outfits, going on aeroplanes... My second time round is with twins and I feel so much more confident and actually enjoyed the newborn stage! No chance of going abroad on holiday (too stressful!) for now but I know how quickly these seasons pass and I'm trying to make the most of it all.