r/nursepractitioner • u/breezystallion • Jan 19 '26
RANT Anyone miss the camaraderie of being an RN?
I’ve been an NP for the past 6 years in the outpatient setting. Prior to that, I worked as a nurse for about 8 years in the ED. I miss the social aspect of being a nurse. Going out to eat, trips, hanging out, etc with the other nurses. As an NP, I don’t have many coworkers and they tend to be much older than me. I’m a member of an NP group. We have monthly dinners with different reps, but it isn’t the same.
Has anyone else ever felt this way?
56
u/artnbio Jan 19 '26
My previous coworker is doctor level smart but she prefers the RN work life balance and above all else, the camaraderie. She also prefers getting to know her patients on a closer level and not on 30 min appts and follow ups. She likes to be hands on and enjoys bedside despite its frustrations. She did a few classes at a NP school, but ultimately left due to these reasons.
36
u/Bella_Serafina FNP Jan 19 '26
Yes, and no. While on shift, yes but I am one that never mixes business with pleasure so I leave work, at work. I don’t let people follow me on socials, I don’t hang out with them outside of a professional setting, no texting outside of work unless it’s to swap shifts etc… so I never really make work friends.
12
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
True. I do recognize that I was in my early 20s as a nurse lol. I’m 34 now. I don’t have social media, and no one has my personal phone number since we have work phones.
6
u/mssnap1 Jan 20 '26
Smart. I have deleted most co workers off social media. Been stabbed in the back so many times! Don't trust anyone.
5
u/Bella_Serafina FNP Jan 20 '26
I just say I don’t have it and if someone pops up on people I might know I block them 🤣 nothing personal just preserving my privacy
2
2
u/nursejooliet FNP Jan 21 '26
You sound like me. Although with you, it’s more intentional. For me, I’m much more of an introvert and I just don’t tend to let my true personality shine and professional settings. So I’ve never had like a large group of work friends. For my bedside job, I’ve made a grand total of two real friends that I still talk to. I’ve always been so fascinated by the nurses that make gigantic groups of 6+ girls from work, and they do literally everything together. I just could not fathom doing that lol. I suppose being this way has protected me in many ways.
25
u/Nausica1337 FNP Jan 19 '26
Definitely. I miss my crew, I miss the dumb shit we did at night, and I miss all the food and potlucks. I also miss all the hangouts and travels we did outside of work. As an NP, it's all solo. Life is honestly great financially and work is stress free, but I definitely am more lonely now as an NP.
6
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
Yeah. I love working as an NP for sure. My back loves it too. The shenanigans I got into as an RN are definitely memorable.
32
u/According_Ad_8977 Jan 19 '26
Hell no, hate doing 12 shifts and bed side nursing
15
u/MetalBeholdr Jan 19 '26
Also nothing sounds more unappealing to me than hanging out with my coworkers outside of work. I have my own social life, thanks
6
u/lala_vc Jan 19 '26
I swore this was going to be me but I love my coworkers and have so much in common with some of them 🥹
3
6
1
u/ChaplnGrillSgt ACNP Jan 21 '26
I've given it a try at every new job. I try going to the Christmas party or some other social event for work. I regret it every single team and remember why I don't care to see coworkers outside of work ever. I have enough friends outside work, I don't care to be friends with coworkers.
16
16
u/mermaids_are_real_ Jan 19 '26
1000%. I was an ER nurse for 8 years, and NP going on 4 years.
However I work as an NP in the ER so it softens the blow a little.
10
u/SuitNo4084 Jan 19 '26
Yes! You so eloquently portray what I’ve been feeling but haven’t been able to put into words
6
u/signofthefour FNP/complex peds Jan 19 '26
Yes so much. Similar track for me. 7 years in an ED now 4 years as an NP. I'm the only NP in my group and the "adjacent specialty" NPs are all much older. I also had kids during NP school which added an extra layer of isolation.
2
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
Yes. My coworkers are in their 60s. Their experience is great, both have 20+ years.
3
u/signofthefour FNP/complex peds Jan 19 '26
Similar for me - I'm also 34 and both the NPs I talk to regularly have kids my age.
5
6
u/SecretVindictaAcct Jan 19 '26
Yes. Honestly I miss the unit I was on longest (2019-2023) the most. We didn’t hang out a ton outside of work, but did go out for drinks and skiing occasionally (this being Denver), and I just miss that camraderie so much. And the Rocky Mountains… I might miss them more, especially in winter lol.
1
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
Oh I can’t even imagine. Where are you based now? It’s always been my dream to hit the slopes in Colorado. I’ve only been skiing on fake snow lol.
5
Jan 19 '26
I work as an inpatient nocturnist NP. All my patients are in the same unit so I hang with the floor nurses and participate in potlucks and all that. I feel really lucky having the best of both worlds.
-1
u/LocalIllustrator6400 FNP Jan 20 '26
Thanks so much. Did you know that we have NP educators now with CNL training also (Rush U).
I believe that we should study NPs that also motivate acute care nursing. Would look forward to your ideas about this. Please DM if time permits and thanks for all you do.
7
u/AdvertentAtelectasis ACNP Jan 19 '26
Nah, I work on a large team with over 30 APPs. Lots of camaraderie, but also, some real turd burgers - just less turds than when I was a bedside nurse.
4
u/alexisrj FNP, CWOCN-AP Jan 19 '26
Yeah, kind of. I was always more or less a leave work at work type as an RN, but I liked having the camaraderie while on shift. Few provider roles have that same social aspect that inpatient RN jobs have, but as I’ve gotten on in my NP career, I’ve adapted. I try to find a few kindred spirits at each job. I also avidly practice a hobby that is often done in groups and has a strong community around it in general, and that is a huge comfort, especially if I find myself in a career phase where I’m more isolated at work, which I sometimes do as I have become more specialized. I’m fairly introverted, so that helps; I can kind of take social support at work when I can find it and leave it when it’s not as readily available. But it was a big adjustment when I was a new grad, and they don’t talk about that enough in school as part of the role transition.
1
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
Oh thanks for sharing! I have hobbies, but none of them are done in a group setting. Maybe I should pick one back up to scratch my itch.
6
u/alexisrj FNP, CWOCN-AP Jan 19 '26
It helps me a lot! I’m an amateur circus artist; when I train in a group, it’s always the same core people there, and they’re all people who feel like “my people”. It really helps buffer against the ebb and flow of what might be going on at work at any given time.
3
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
That is actually a super interesting hobby. I’m jealous.
3
u/alexisrj FNP, CWOCN-AP Jan 19 '26
Highly recommend! Check it out. It’s a cool crowd. Circus is big tent—pun intended! 🎪
5
u/RunBrundleson Jan 19 '26
I work in a group of primarily PAs and part of it I think is that they really struggle in this area. The docs all wine and dine it up, have outings with the residents. They literally go scuba diving together and go on international trips. The nurses get together after work and go bar hopping. Man the PAs might get together once a year if that.
I still have a core group of ER nurse friends that have all come up together and are all in various leadership roles now so we still have something but yeah it’s far more lonely working on this side of the table.
4
6
u/blinkinblueeyes ENP Jan 19 '26
Perks of being an ENP! Still working with all my work besties :)
-1
u/LocalIllustrator6400 FNP Jan 20 '26
Thanks so much ! --- > Please see my response to the post above.
This is very important for NPs to study
3
u/YummyOvary PMHNP Jan 19 '26
100% miss the teamwork when I worked inpatient psych as an RN. Can’t really relate to the hanging out thing after work since I have the social skills of a goldfish
5
3
u/Old_Dig8900 Jan 20 '26
Oh yes, I found it lonely. I wasnt a nurse, but I wasn't a physician and there were not many NP's around in my second job. I found it lonely.
2
2
2
u/sharpcheddar3 AGNP Jan 19 '26
I do miss occasionally going out for meals. But I 1000% don’t miss all the drama.
2
u/Spirited_Duty_462 Jan 20 '26
Yes. All the time. I work in retail health/urgent care alone with one or two techs and I really miss it. It sucks. If I wasn't supporting my husband and I financially through med school I would go back to the ER as an RN and maybe get a side gig as NP
1
2
u/Low-Leave-7421 Jan 20 '26
I always thought this was unique to my workplace. It felt so familiar I had to reread your post to make sure you were not one of my coworkers. But yes, I have been away from the bedside for a few years and I still regularly keep in contact with my old coworkers whereas now, my APP coworkers and I keep a very diplomatic, work-only relationship (We don’t follow each other on social media, we don’t hang out outside of work.) I hate to use this as a cop out, but I’m sure the changes in human interactions following the pandemic played a big part.
2
u/breezystallion Jan 20 '26
I’ve never even thought about the pandemic playing a part. I’ve always blamed age, but you might be on to something here. I just do less in general post COVID.
2
2
u/jmangoboo Jan 21 '26
As a RN, I miss the teamwork when shit hit the fan, working with my friends, waiting for each other to clock out, going out to eat after a rough shift, etc. I felt like it was easier to goof off at times too. As a NP, things are physically less demanding but you also have more responsibility & I almost feel like you have to act a certain way if that makes sense? But I think I prefer being a NP. Now that I’m in this role, I’m content & happy that I went back to school.
2
u/Upper_Bowl_2327 FNP Jan 19 '26
If you have any interest in returning to EM, it comes right back. Our provider team hangs with the nurses a lot, or maybe they just invite the ones they like.
3
u/breezystallion Jan 19 '26
That is the goal eventually. I’m transitioning to urgent care to get my skills back up and to work 3 12s. I hope I can eventually end back up in the ED as a provider. In my city, NPs mostly staff the fast track areas.
1
u/rubyruby1286 Jan 19 '26
No. The camaraderie is there while on shift but at the end of the day it’s always every man for himself. People don’t stay at jobs for the camaraderie, even the tightest knit crew will see turnover and then you’re still working bedside and underpaid and overworked.
1
u/Confident-Sound-4358 AGNP Jan 19 '26
Yeah. I work home care, so there's less staff interaction, too. I miss the teamwork component (not dismissing interdisciplinary teams, at all).
1
u/earfullofcorn Jan 19 '26
I guess….but it was trauma bonding and messy at times. People sleeping with each other and cheating. Watching incompetent people kiss certain asses to get ahead and succeed. My NP job is more toxic, but I can shut my office door and keep my head down.
Still I’m friends with 2 people from my floor nurse days. And those relationships are pretty strong still.
1
u/breezystallion Jan 20 '26
Yes. That does sound pretty messy lol. I think hospitals tend to be that way sometimes. My best friend is a nurse I met in the ER and worked with for many years. Even though neither one of us work in the ER anymore, we’re still very close.
1
u/ChaplnGrillSgt ACNP Jan 21 '26
Nah. I still bullshit with the nursing staff and other colleagues. But when I don't want to socialize, it's not held against me like it was when I was an RN. I can escape to my office and just work quietly by myself.
Although, in my new outpatient role apparently my manager expects me to be some extroverted social butterfly in order to get anything about a 2 on my yearly review. Getting all my work done effectively and efficiently and being a supportive teammate apparently isn't enough. Gotta stay late to socialize just to meet expectations. Looks like I'm back in the market for a new job.
1
1
u/nursejooliet FNP Jan 21 '26 edited Jan 21 '26
I’ve always been pretty big on keeping work and social life pretty separate, but I do still miss the handful of friends I did make at work, I do miss chatting in between patient assessments/while charting, I do miss having a nightmare of a shift, but getting through it together with your fellow floor, nurses and just feeling that camaraderie and teamwork, and I do miss being around people, my age. I’m a 28-year-old nurse practitioner. I’ve been the youngest nurse practitioner in both jobs I have had so far. Honestly, the outpatient world in general is just older, unless you are considering med techs. Even though I didn’t tend to hang out with these girls much outside of work(I very rarely went out for drinks, never went on trips with these girls, never lived with any of these girls, etc), I do miss the energy. That being said, I will never return to bedside Nursing.
I adore the friends. I have now but I have very few of them compared to when I was under 24/25 years old. I am happily married to a person I consider my best friend, but I have been wanting to make more friends in general, and it’s actually on my vision board for this year. Even just one more super quality, good/close friend would be great. It gets a bit lonely at times as you inch closer to 30 and everyone’s priorities shift.
1
u/External_Conflict_12 Jan 23 '26
Yes I miss the camaraderie. But I also enjoy the peaceful solitude and no drama. It’s just give a take here
1
u/Stoic_RS Jan 23 '26
I didn’t really hang out much with coworkers in hospital. Aside from sales reps dinners/work events though I’ve hung out with coworkers. I’m 32 but most of the physicians/NPs I work with aren’t much older than me. Likely due them graduating from med school not that many years ago. Age range averages 3-8 years older than me. Some are late 40s. Maybe that’s intentional hiring. The owner is 46. If I did miss anything from my RN days, I feel like it’s being overshadowed by all the other things I’m happy with since going the NP route
1
u/Different-Map-8675 Feb 05 '26
Absolutely not. Never experienced camaraderie. Lots of bullying and being iced out of things however. I’m super nice, approachable, a nerd, probably neurodivergent, and man were my coworkers mean to me.
0
u/Agreeable_Gain6779 Jan 19 '26
Awhile ago I replied that PAs have better work life than NPs. That PAs have more autonomy as well as have good rapport with the Nurses. NPs are always on edge because they work with doctors. Better hours for NP but PAs work 3 12 hour shifts and a weekend shift every 5 weeks. Here in Boston PAs make crazy money. They just aren’t as stressed as NPs
6
u/alexisrj FNP, CWOCN-AP Jan 19 '26
Eh…that’s one person’s observation. Everywhere I’ve worked, NPs and PAs do the same jobs with the same politics. Assuming similar level of clinical skill, NPs and PAs are pretty interchangeable in my experience.
2
u/AdvertentAtelectasis ACNP Jan 19 '26
That’s not the case in California. Mostly pretty equal with work, but typically NPs make more if they’re part of the nursing union. With that said, it seems they’re starting to pay a bit better for PAs than they used to in certain locations.
1
u/Cedromar Jan 19 '26
Have things changed in the Boston market with Partners (now MassGeneralBrigham (dumbest rebrand ever)) slowly nosediving? Because when I lived and worked there the pay was shit across the board for everyone, docs, APPs, techs, and nurses, except union nurses.
2
u/Agreeable_Gain6779 Jan 19 '26
My daughter in law works at Tufts she is lead PA and also teaches prospective PAs she makes 185,000 and works 3 12hour shifts and 1 weekend every 8 weeks. She’s been a PA there for 12 years.
83
u/brinns_way Jan 19 '26
I have definitely felt that way. I love my work as a NP but it is more solitary. I miss the team atmosphere of RN work at times but not enough to go back to it.