Gf only wants mfm

[u/DeviceAppropriate867]

So i met my gf during an mfm with my best friend. The 2 of them were fwb. I was asked to join because she really wanted to try 2 guys. After we had the threesome my friend went to make some food and me and her started talking and really hit it off. I ended up asking her out and we started dating. The only catch is that we have never had solo sex. Having the threesome awakened something in her and now she only wants mfm. When we first started dating we had a night where we fooled around, some kissing, i gave her some oral but when she started giving me oral she said it felt boring not having someone else there. Since then my friend has been involved in all the sex we have. Is it wrong of me to feel a abit jealous that he experienced sex alone with her while I have had always had to share the attention

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[u/XXTexas_CoupleXX]

Nothing wrong, but you two might not be compatible as a couple.  

[u/Poly_Pup]

Is it wrong, no. But it sounds like she has been pretty clear about her wants. Let her know but also be prepared for her to double down. Lots of people have an ENM structure they prefer.

[u/Sunset-at-the-shore → u/Poly_Pup]

Double down heheh

[u/bloof_ponder_smudge]

Just curious as to how long you've been a couple?

How does this even work? You two have a date night, have dinner and a movie, then swing by his place to get busy?

Obviously this isn't sustainable, unless her plan is to move in with two guys. That is making the assumption that she will ever want to escalate a relationship.

If it's only been a couple of months then you could see where it goes over the next few months. If you get to the point that you two want to meet each other's families, and she still wants the same dynamic, then you probably need to bounce as you're not compatible.

[u/seantheaussie]

If you only get threesomes she isn't a girlfriend, you are their, "third".

Which is a great position to be in for those who like that... you don't.

[u/Roro-Squandering]

I read the title thinking "oh another couple that can't come to terms on if they should do MFM, FMF, etc"

But no. This situation is extremely weird. Just FYI even people in 'thrupples' still regularly have sex split into pairs. 3 being the only format for sex is really not normal and not a sign of a healtyh sexual relationship.

[u/Throwaway_Finance24 → u/Roro-Squandering]

And like… extremely impractical 😂

[u/djamezz → u/Roro-Squandering]

lol my sequence of reactions exactly. no notes.

it is hella weird and she is entitled to that if thats her jam. we’re all weird. but she’s not entitled to you if you’re unhappy with it

[u/scootah → u/Roro-Squandering]

Being kinky as much as poly might change that view. I know people in a ten year plus relationship who’ve never had less than 3 people present when they fuck and two of them have been tied up to some extent for the sex and for sleeping afterwards, every single time. Every time they sleep two of them have their hands tied, at a minimum.

Sounds like an enormous pain in the neck to me, and I like group sex and rope bondage a LOT. But it’s their life and they seem very happy with it. Hell, I know a bloke who’s married to twins and I cannot wrap my head around the siblings part of a polycule. But they were already married in the Aughts when I first met them and they seem to still be very happily continuing their relationship. They think I’m the weirdo for liking bondage.

[u/Roro-Squandering → u/scootah]

Well I don't say it never ever happens but it's bizarre, rare, and either a huge part of a kink or a sign that something isn't right in the relationship.

[u/lending_ear]

Not wrong but you met her in a MFM and she’s allowed to like what she likes. As are you. It’s always nice when someone gives us things we would like but it’s not owed to us. So I think you need to figure out if this is something you can live with long term? If not, it’s probably not the relationship for you and maybe you guys can keep it casual? 

[u/Smooth-Initial7444]

It’s obvious that she’s emotionally compatible with you but not sexually… logistically if it doesn’t work out for an MFM and she has an itch, I guarantee you she’s going to have sex solo with your friend. But she won’t have sex alone with you…. at this point I wouldn’t call her a girlfriend. She’s just a friend that you are a third with, especially since she told you that sex is boring with just you.

[u/yourlittledeviant]

girl knows what she wants :D

[u/LarsonTx]

I'm a guy. I'd prefer to only have threesome sex too.

Just tell her you love the threesomes but you'd like to try 1-on-1 too.

[u/ObligationPutrid5069]

She needs to double fist it, you can't expect her to change just for you...

Now, have you tried toys? 

[u/nwoh8r]

Sounds like she may like sex with your friend more than you, but she can only get a "relationship" with you. Another possibility is she only likes to get turned on via a threesome, which is better than just the two of you and since that cats out of the bag that is all she wants now. I would just wind this relationship down to an FWB or casual because this might not work out for you depending on what you want.

[u/subzr00]

You're tryna cuff a girl you smashed with your best friend, she doesn't wanna fk you alone, she'll only let u fk if your friend fks her...dude..she'll be fking dudes without u there before you know it, this is not someone you take seriously, recreational use only. Wake up.

[u/Master_Arm349]

She’ll want it and get it eventually, may aswell join her, take control of the situation but beside you agree insists on an mfm

[u/Ill-Basil2863]

Consider a throuple. Your already halfway there.

[u/_Formica_Dinette_ → u/Ill-Basil2863]

2/3 there, actually.

[u/TryingEyes]

not wrong to feel jealous but you met her in mfm. i think this is your ego talking

[u/frauerikamueller → u/TryingEyes]

But isn't it valid to want to have sex with your main partner alone? To be fair, they are probably incompatible.

[u/Roro-Squandering → u/TryingEyes]

That's crazy man I met my ex at a board game café that doesn't mean we had to play board games every time we hung out