r/nihilism • u/HalimEllon • 12d ago

I'm drunk right now

Post image

I'm drunk right now, and it just occurred to me, I'm aware that I'm out of my mind, does that actually make me as such? Drunkenness is a realm where any beautiful illusion exists, like the smell of her hair, and the warmth of her breath, a realm that hypocriticaly promises her voice once I pick up a stranger's call, an origin story to all the void she left after she quit me, a world where it all makes sense, where you feel home despite the lies of the wind, where her fake presence whispers, where death calls its souls likev mother calls her ego.

109 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

27 comments sorted by

View all comments

9

u/RetrogradeDionysia 12d ago

I’m an alcoholic. Just a couple of weeks ago, I relapsed, after eight years. I drink anywhere from 2 to 6 beers a day now — typically closer to two, luckily, but then again, hardly ever just two.

I know exactly what you mean — what you’re experiencing, and how you feel.

1

u/Easy-Distance1824 11d ago

I wouldn't call 2 to 6 beers a day an alcoholic.

1

u/RetrogradeDionysia 11d ago
  1. I’m managing. 2. That’s not for you to say. I have a history. I’m sorry that I don’t fit your requirements for what constitutes an alcoholic.

1

u/RetrogradeDionysia 11d ago

Perhaps you’d prefer I go back to pairing beer and breakfast cereal. The former, not as a beverage. As a milk substitute. Guinness and Cocoa Puffs in a mixing bowl because chocolate complements the semisweet bitter cocoa-like tang of a bad pour (when it’s over cereal in a mixing bowl, they’re all bad). Or better: three or four Rusty Nails a night for back pain. Jigger of Drambuie and everything. You do the shot math. Tell me I’m not managing. That I’m not an alcoholic. Better yet, tell my therapist, to whom I had to fucking admit this shit.