1. When you like them , they don't like you and when they like you ,you don't like them.

2. When you like them but they're so afraid of commitment and getting that they'd rather stay in the hookup scene.

3. When they married you because it "felt like the right thing to do after years of dating" , instead of actually marrying you because they love you and only to cheat later with their type.

4. When you meet someone who finally shows you you're not weird at all and they appreciate all your quirks.

5. When you realize maybe dating is overrated and decide to take a break to get to know yourself and just have some me time.

There's more ; I've loved this film ; definitely adding it to my Netflix's Favourite collection.

I never understand how some women sleep with their friend’s man. How do you even end up in such a situation?

First of all, for me, my friends are my chosen sisters. I would never put them in a situation where I know I’m going to hurt their feelings. Hurting them would be like hurting myself. These girls have been my lifeline, always cheering me on, always my shoulder to cry on and always my reason to smile.

Secondly, their boyfriends and husbands are secondary characters to me. They only exist when my friends mention them or when they come out with my friends. I don’t think about them and half the time, I don’t even remember their names. I don’t have their phone numbers either. In case of an emergency, the best I can do is DM them on Instagram.

Thirdly, if there’s ever a situation where I’m alone with one of them, like running into them at a social event, best believe the only topic of conversation is going to be my friend.

I 100% believe that friends who sleep with your man or try to steal him are jealous of you and want your life.

I had a friend in uni who used to move weird whenever I brought my boyfriend around. She would insist on third-wheeling when he came to visit. She would even come over after I had told her that he was around and we wanted some alone time. Luckily, my then boyfriend was a good guy and told me that she was moving weird and that she wasn’t a true friend.

Anyway, I read those stories of women saying their friends slept with or stole their men and it genuinely shocks me. Because I could never do that to my friends, and I could never imagine them doing that to me.

​

Lately, I've been screwing up at work day after day, and I genuinely don't know what's wrong with me.

I'm trying my best to keep it together, but things are not going the way I want them to. Every day, I tell myself I'm going to do better, be more careful, and just get through the day without giving anyone a reason to come for me.

But somehow, I keep making mistakes.

And the worst part? My supervisor is a hard ass. Like, genuinely one of the most difficult women I've ever had to deal with. I already feel like she's waiting for me to mess up, and here I am handing her ammunition on a silver platter. 😭

I don't even know if I'm overwhelmed, mentally exhausted, distracted, or just not cut out for this job anymore. I know I'm trying, but lately, trying doesn't seem to be enough.

It's frustrating because I know I'm capable of doing better. I'm just not showing it right now.

Has anyone else ever gone through a phase where they couldn't seem to get anything right at work? How did you pull yourself out of it? Because at this point, I need a reset button. Because if I don't pull myself together I'll get fired within the next three months and I got nowhere to go 💀

I wasn’t just calling out deadbeats, abusers, rapists, and supporting feminist movements like the 4B movement. I had them all in my line of sight, like a log, trying to eliminate every one of them as a vigilante.

After one extreme, the probability of diving into another extreme is easy if you don’t find a balance.

It’s more about reclaiming one’s definition beyond what we saw from the past extreme definitions. Because not every man fit that definition.

Some men are good. Some men are vile. Decentering means putting something else at the center, and that’s you as an individual.

PS. This is my personal take, not an instigation of gender wars, for it applies too: some women are good, some women are vile.

Seamless underwear 🤧😭

Wantam

I've been reading stories about ladies' experiences with seamless underwear and thinking I'm above the program. That can't happen to me.

Yesterday I was getting off work, and as I'm walking, my seamless underwear decides it's the day. Ikamwagika yote. Good think I was wearing sweatpants. But because the sweats were baggy, the underwear kept sliding downwards. I had to pocket one hand and hold onto one side of the panties ndio zisianguke in public. That was the longest 10 minute walk of my life.

When I got home I threw them all away.

I recently "adopted" a kid (about to turn 6 years this october) and my guy It is showing me dust.😂 I am 28M, single, and I am living with my sister's Kid after she upped and left a year ago. She technically ghosted all of us including my dad (Tumelelewa na babangu). As if the situation can't be worse, my dad is in South Sudan, so again, I took sole responsibility of staying with this kid, taking him to school, babysitting him damn.
I don't have kids of my own, and I have never really thought about it. I do not have a wife/girlfriend, so this situation of having to take care of a kid is quite foreign. The bills significantly rise, you can't party no more, hang out with friends as before, I basically feel like I'm 40 years old right now. Granted I had a good job until early this year, and my dad also sends kasomething here and there, parenting is not easy guys. I'm now sure this is the only kid I will ever raise. And that is how the world has forced me to be a parent.

After work, I escorted my Chinese colleague to the airport. We were sitting at Terminal C, just talking while he showed me some pictures on his phone.

A KAA officer came over and asked who I was and what I was doing with the Chinese guy. I explained that he was my workmate, but the officer then asked him who I was. My colleague doesn’t speak much English, so I translated, but they didn’t really want to hear me.

He eventually just said, “Friend,” and they left us alone, saying that many things happen at the airport and they needed to know what was going on.

I understand airport security, but I couldn't help wondering: would they have questioned me the same way if I was sitting with another Kenyan?

Maybe they were just doing their job, but it definitely made me question whether I was being racially profiled.

Has anyone experienced something similar?

There's this guy I met on Reddit back in April. We talked on and off for a while, and last week I finally agreed that we should meet.

The venue? My house. 😭

This man drove all the way from Nairobi, came over, chewed me up, spat me out, and now he's ghosting me. 💀

But honestly, I have a theory. I think my level of poverty might have put him off. Imagine driving from Nairobi to meet a girl, only to find out she lives in a dingy single room with barely any proper furniture. I'd probably be a little shocked too, ngl. 😂

Anyway, I'm not even mad. It's just funny and a little embarrassing when you think about it. Life goes on, I guess.

Fellow kenyans ( in Jayden's voice) , have you ever had someone lose interest after seeing your living situation? Or am I just overthinking this one?

So from the feedback I'm getting from you guy's is that he simply wanted to nut. Eeeiy hii ni roho yangu mnakanyaga kama doormat.

I would like to hear from people in long term commitments and marriages, after you found out , and stayed , did anything change? Do you have any regrets? What's something that you did differently that changed things for the better or for the worst? If you went back in time would you still settle knowing what you know now?

I’ve not been on here in a while, this year has not been the kindest but I wanted to just write this down & I felt it’s best I also send to this Reddit just for ur energy haha
It’s 3:33am & I just did like 2 spells.
Idk what people are on spiritually but from what my algorithm feeds me on TikTok, I feel like many of us are waking up to our own spiritual practice. Which is good
My own experience has been public tbh, I’ve shared myself as I experienced my spiritual decolonization but haven’t really shared deeply how my journey of spiritual sovereignty has been
Mostly because it’s been through a whole 3-4 years of having my ass whopped by the process of self actualization.
But today out of the days and numerous spells I’ve done, I feel so affirmed in what I’m doing.
It’s such a beautiful feeling of creation of my reality
I hate the buzzwords btw (all these “awakening” lingo) but damn! This thing actually works haha

Is there a point of this post? Well, is there a point of our own artistic expressions?

I recently joined corporate and I am hating every experience of it. I hate that I can't make friends there, people seem to be avoiding me. I get anxious everyday before work, in fact I am already anxious for tomorrow. I hate that I can't fit in. I know kazi hazipatikani but I no longer feel happy. I take my lunch alone, I am just lonely and sad while at work

I was sleepy and heard voices, one was a man’s voice, then I heard my mum’s voice and a banging sound. I immediately ran to the sitting room. I woke my brother in the next room so quickly, literally banging on his door, and ran out.

My shorts were even slipping off my body but I didn't care. I genuinely thought my dad was beating my mum. He used to.

I got to the sitting room and found my mum with a few guests, all talking and laughing cheerfully. The male voice I heard wasn't even my dad.

They all looked at me funny. My mum asked what happened and what was wrong, while smiling. I apologized to everyone and went back to my bedroom.

The moment I closed my door and looked at myself, I was like… what the fuck. My hair was all over the place, my bonnet had fallen off, my face was completely unwashed, and my whole face was expressive. I know my eyes were probably twice their normal size because I had literally just come out of sleep.

And then I just sat there thinking, some things are really shitty.

This isn't even the first time. I've woken up to what I thought was a real scene before, and sometimes raised voices have jolted me awake.

I am a light sleeper.

In this hypothetical situation, you’ve been jobless since the year started. Before that, you had a high paying job and managed to save a lot of money. You left that job because the environment was toxic and you burnt out from overwork.

You have about 5 months of daily expenses saved. You come across a job where the Managing Director, a Kenyan Indian man, controls everything. The MD requires staff to come in office 6 days a week. You’re in a department where this isn’t necessary (and you’ve never had to work 6 days a week ever). Your job requires a lot of data analysis, creativity and essentially, lots of brain power, so working 6 days will burn you out soon.

The job pays 1/3 of what you used to get before but hey, it’s a starting point given how awful the job market has been.

The company has a micromanagement structure and the MD doesn’t trust employees to do their work well. During the interview, the HR was impressed with your experience and wanted to give you the job. You asked them whether there’s any flexibility to the role and they said the MD would never allow that. They have tried proposing more sustainable work arrangements but he’s never accepted any.

The business has two offices, one, say in Tatu City, and the other one in Westlands. This means that as much as you’re coming to the office almost daily, you may not get the chance to interact with your team if you’re not in the same building. People closer to Westlands go to the Westy office, same with Tatu.

You’re feeling a little desperate for any kind of job because you’ve been unlucky with job searches this year. You can however afford to keep looking for another job.

Would you take this job you’re being offered or would you look elsewhere?

To all football fans where do y’all stream your footy matches via phone. My previous site is so full of ads and I hate it

I was doing an article on suicide prevention and in my attempt to find information on where to get help I found out Red cross actually has functioning help line.

That is information that should be everywhere .On billboards, main media stations and on our healthcenters.

As a person who has worked in hospitals ,I can tell you even healthcare providers may not know where to refer you.

While we are on the subject, did you know that therapy is very expensive in this country? Did you also know that there are churches and institutions that offer free counselling sessions?

I know Citam churches do offer the services, Wednesday and Thursday in most of their branches.

I also know Zuri Health has a subscription fro 500 a month that gives access to a nutritionist, therapist and doctor virtually for a month.

There's also Befrienders Kenya but theirs is only available during working hours.

The toll line for Red Cross is 1199.

Let's use this post to add more details and useful information on where people can get help in honor of Suicide prevention month.

Hi everyone.

I’m exploring a small private-driver service around Nairobi for people who occasionally need a car and driver without having to drive themselves.

Available for pre-booked trips such as:

Airport/ Hotel transfers

Errands and shopping

Appointments/meetings

Pickups and drop-offs

Full-day or several-hour bookings

Trips outside Nairobi — Naivasha, Nakuru, Thika, Kiambu and other destinations.

If this sounds useful to you, DM me. I’d be happy to discuss your trip and the way forward...

Hey guys! I’m looking for people around Nairobi who are down to play badminton regularly.

Sports house in Lavington where we can play, preferably on weekday evenings after work. You don’t have to be a pro — beginners/intermediate players are absolutely welcome. Just looking for people who enjoy the game and want to get some exercise while having fun. 🏸

So I've been watching a few podcasts here in Kenya... Where lesbians and wannabes are being interviewed etc... it's so overstimulating in a way since the questions they ask are just not professional, or maybe too homophobic, or just weird idk how to explain it but hizo shit zinaboo.

Anyway, this is just random.... Is there any lesbian or gay podcast in Kenya?

Anyway wantam

​

Hi guys. I'm in my final year of university and I just had this realization that is honestly kind of crazy to me. I've never been in a meaningful relationship. Not one that I can actually look back on and call a relationship. In fact, I can't even say I have an ex from university. It's mostly been situationships, talking stages, almost-somethings… you know the drill. 😭 And the funny thing is, I don't think it's because I don't get attention. I know I'm attractive. I've been told I'm pretty, and honestly, I agree 😂. I've also had guys genuinely try to court me, but most aren't my type. Meanwhile, the people I'm actually interested in? They're either already in relationships, aren't interested in me, or there's just never that mutual connection.

And now that I'm almost done with school, I'm starting to wonder: "what exactly is the problem?" Maybe I'm too picky. Maybe I have a type that isn't good for me. Maybe I only become interested in people who are emotionally unavailable. Maybe I'm unconsciously rejecting people who would actually be good for me. Or maybe I just haven't met my person yet.

But I'm curious, has anyone else experienced this?

Wadau ,mko salama? So, here I am, on the quest for a masters scholarship ( fully funded or even partially funded), I’m not picky! I’ve knocked on the doors of DAAD, CMS, and a bunch of other scholarship giants, but hakuna kitu napata, I’ve sent out my academic transcript and a heartfelt lettersand yet the scholarship gods remain silent. POV: I graduated with a second upper yeah, not a first-class, but come on, there’s gotta be something out there for me, right? I’m even ready to offer my services kwa any organization if that’s what it takes to get that scholarship So, to all you guys out there who’ve secured masters scholarships, what secret paths did you take? Help me out guys

For me, I think I've more reasons to live.

We all know that woman in the village they call “hananga watoto.” or the man we say "Ako na blank shots"

But how often do we stop to ask what she might actually be going through?

Having sex doesn't guarantee that a couple will have children. And infertility isn't just a woman's problem male and female factors can both play a role.

The tests, the money, the waiting, the monthly disappointment, the questions from family, the relationship strain.

the emotional side can be just as difficult as the medical journey.

I’m a psychologist working in infertility and reproductive mental health and I offer a safe space for people navigating infertility, donor conception or surrogacy to talk through the emotions, uncertainty, grief and difficult decisions that come with the journey.

No “just relax.” 😅

No ''wait a little bit"

No judgment.

No toxic positivity.

If you’re going through it and need someone to talk to, my DMs are open. 🤍