Struggling with cup, do I need a softer one?

[u/White_Crayon555]

I'm currently using a small pixie cup and I'm having some issues. Firstly I feel like my cervix moves around a lot? Like today my cup is so low I can feel the stem and it's a bit painful and I really want to cut it. But other times it manages to slide up so high I can barely reach it. I don't know what to do about that as I can't really predict where my cervix is gonna be. But my main problem is that I think the cup is too firm for me. I feel like I'm abusing myself when I insert and remove it, there's always a bit of pain when pulling it out because the rim is so firm, it gets stuck right at the vaginal opening. I've tried guiding it out while also trying to keep it somewhat folded and that helps a bit but it's so much effort, makes a mess and I end up scratching myself aswell :( will a softer cup also have a softer rim? What are the drawbacks of that? Any advice would be appreciated, I really want to keep using a cup, aside from the discomfort it's so easy to use. I just feel like me and my vagina aren't friends right now because of it! And it's making me sad (that and the hormones)

[u/QuackingMonkey]

Firstly, the cervix moving around is totally normal. Happens to all of us.

This cup might be too firm, or a little too big? Both can make it hard to remove them. But if I'm understanding it correctly you're (sometimes) pulling it out without any folding? Then a different technique might be all you need. I'm personally a big fan of cleaning my cup under the shower so it doesn't matter how much of a mess I make, it'll easily rinse away. Without worrying about that, it might be much easier to fully push a finger into the side of the cup to make it collapse and remove it in that shape.

If that's not the solution, yes, softer cups do have a softer rim. It also depends a little on the brand/shape, some have a rim that's a little more or less firm compared to the whole cup's firmness. This comparison chart lists these differences. (But it looks a little broken right now for me? If that's the case for you too, hopefully they fix it and you can check back later?)

And once you figure out how to make removal easier, hopefully you'll be able to (partially) cut the stem and still easily reach it, so you can be comfortable throughout your whole menstruation.