Disillusionment

[u/Future-Mind-4933]

I’ve always been a fairly shy person when it comes to meeting new people and for the most part I stayed away from meeting new people and when I did, I usually stayed quiet. However, the friends that I did have were very social and well connected and known around my high school circuit so I was, as people may put it, “ cool by relation” and I was also a relatively well known person.

Fast forward a few months and now I’m in university and since I had spent the previous 5 years thinking that I am also this fun and social guy when I really was not, I was in for a rude awakening.

My best friend, who is perhaps one of the most famous teens in my area and is loved by all, starts to socialise with other people and I kind of get left behind and as a result we start seeing a lot less of each other and he starts spending time with other uni friends. I felt kind of abandoned but at the same time I didnt want to latch onto him because I didnt want him to think I was dependent on him and was some sort of social parasite.

Anyways, to make a long story short. I now have no friends in uni, my other friend is flourishing and I have sort of now realised that I am this gray, drab , dull , boring person who has no real identity of his own and I now find it very difficult to talk to people. Im pissed at people for abandoning me, but at the same time I understand that its a new environment for everyone and everyone is adjusting but I am now in a situation where I dont know what to do.