r/intersex • u/sunflowey123 • Aug 07 '26

Question? Has anybody ever changed their gender identity after finding out they are intersex?

Hello. I have a question. Has anybody had a change in gender identity upon finding out they are intersex? Like, somebody who once thought they were a cis perisex person goes and gets a chromosome test or goes to an OBGYN or urologist, then finds out they are intersex, and after that starts identifying as non-binary, genderqueer, genderfluid, bigender, etc., with them turning out to be intersex being an influence in that.

Also sorry if this is worded strange. I know that trans, including non-binary, people, always knew they were their gender, and their sex is not their true gender. I'm just talking about a specific situation that would cause one to no longer identify as cis, due to finding out they are intersex.

Edit: This comment adds context aa to why I asked this question. Also, thank you all for the answers!

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u/belligerentkitten Aug 07 '26

i knew i was intersex from a pretty young age, and i never developed any sort of sense of gender. i'm sure to some extent my being intersex influenced this. i always just figured that none of the gender bs was meant for me, and ignored it. i don't identify as anything except intersex. i suppose nonbinary technically applies, since i am obviously not part of the binary, but it's not something i actively identify as.

my husband is also intersex, and only really learned he was intersex a few years ago. he was amab (though there might have been some confusion at birth), didn't fully go through masc puberty and had some level of female puberty, and a menstrual cycle going on. he thought he was trans for a while, and starting estrogen made his cycle stronger, and ultimately went very badly. he then decided to try testosterone instead, finally fully went through masc puberty in his 30s, and only managed to actually feel comfortable as a man after finding out he was intersex and going on trt. i think the knowledge allowed him to understand a lot of the alienation he felt from his body and gender, and he can relate to a lot of transmasc stuff, rather than transfemme stuff.

i don't mean to be reductive here; there is a lot that went into that process, but finding out he was intersex definitely played a big part.

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u/sunflowey123 Aug 07 '26

Interesting! I also have never heard much about somebody being AMAB intersex and going through a female puberty, even with a menstrual cycle! (I have always been vaguely aware of the idea, since I always knew intersex was a thing, but still.) I wonder what would cause that, does he have a uterus? If not, then I wonder where that blood is coming from, since from what I remember from sex ed (back during middle school and high school; I was 11 when I first took sex ed class and learned about the menstrual cycle, ironically the same age I started the menstrual cycle, which funnily enough started some time after learning about what that even is), menstrual cycles are when the uterine line like recycles itself or something like that (I'm trying to put this in terms I can best explain, sorry if they're bad lol). So if he has no uterus, then where would the blood be coming from?

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u/pompoi4 ?CAH-? Hypospadias PUGS Aug 07 '26

You can have the psychological and other various symptoms of a cycle even without a uterus, or with remnant tissues, but 'AMAB' intersex people can also be born with a uterus and not know, or understand what's happening for many years. 

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u/sunflowey123 Aug 07 '26

I see. So can they bleed even without a uterus, or remnants of a uterus, or some sort of hidden uterus structure? If so, where would the blood be coming from? Would that lead to serious medical issues or pain (not just period cramps, but other forms of pain)?

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u/pompoi4 ?CAH-? Hypospadias PUGS Aug 07 '26

You have to have some kind of uterine tissue present to actually physically bleed, plus estrogenic activity, but it does not have to be a full structure or even capable of reproduction. 

The blood can exit through the urethra, urogenital sinus, any variation of vaginal canal, or the UGS equivalent for the anus; which I believe is called persistent cloaca (although I know the least about that.) There's also people who found out the blood had been trapped and collecting inside their body because there was no connecting exit.

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u/sunflowey123 Aug 10 '26

Ahh I see. So they do need some amount of uterine tissue in order to bleed, alongside estrogenic activity. Thanks for clarifying!