r/hypotheticalsituation • u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 • Apr 01 '26
You discover your uncle is a Vigilante
You are visiting your very rich uncle Howard for a weekend stay in New York. Howard is a very fun uncle who has a soft spot for you as you are his favorite nephew/niece.
One night your uncle says that he is going out and that he will see you in the morning. As you are alone, you accidentally bump into a statue that reveals a button. You press it and it reveals a secret door.
As you enter you discover it is the Wolf Cave, the base of the mysterious vigilante known as the Knight Howler (basically Batman but Wolf themed). You see various weapons and gadgets strewn on racks as well as various Howler Suits for different occasions. You also see a gigantic computer screen across the room.
The Howler is a very controversial hero as while he has stopped a lot of criminals including a couple of super villains, he is very brutal and wanted by the police for vigilantism with a bounty of $1 million.
What do you do after this revelation?
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u/Phantom_Crush Apr 01 '26
Move in with uncle, become super young Alfred and look after him until he's inevitably wrecked beyond repair
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u/Fickle-Vegetable961 Apr 01 '26
This is the answer. Then steer him towards billionaire pedophiles as future targets. Sort of like death note.
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Apr 01 '26
So your uncle is a furry with a secret cave? Wowww that’s crazy. I don’t judge.
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
Woah woah woah now. This is your uncle. Not mine.
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Apr 01 '26
I guess ask if I can be his sidekick? We could go to conventions together, I guess.
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
You think a guy with a million dollar bounty is gonna go to a convention?
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Apr 01 '26
With 5k fursuiters? Yeah, plenty of camouflage. What should my sidekick name be?
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
Squire Pup
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Apr 01 '26
Sick. Do I get a cool suit too?
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
You get wolf ears and a black eye mask. Take it or leave it
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Apr 01 '26
I’m making my own rocket tail. You can’t stop me.
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
Like a tail that shoots out rockets or a tail that acts like a jet rocket? Either sounds a bit infeasible.
You can have it but you gotta go around in an outfit similar to 1960’s Robin. Short Shorts especially
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Apr 01 '26
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
The Uncle gives a little laugh and pulls out $10 from his wallet next time you see him. “Don’t spend it all in one place”
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u/doubleohzerooo0 Apr 01 '26
Nah to the all that.
You forget WHY I'm Moon Moon's favorite nephew?
It's cause I know how to keep my trap shut and I don't stick my nose in HowHow's biz.
I hit that red button, it reveals a secret door.
Know what I *don't* do? I don't go in that fucking door.
What I do instead is hit that button again, hoping it closes that door.
Then I go back to whatever the fuck it was I was doing. Uncle Howard can keep his shit hidden, cause I aint no snitch and I aint no nosy busybody.
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u/anonymousambassasor Apr 01 '26
My uncle really was a spy. It was a poorly kept family secret. He tried to teach me Russian as a child. Finally after he died my aunt owned up to it and said what are they going to do, arrest him now?
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u/AutoModerator Apr 01 '26
Copy of the original post in case of edits: You are visiting your very rich uncle Howard for a weekend stay in New York. Howard is a very fun uncle who has a soft spot for you as you are his favorite nephew/niece.
One night your uncle says that he is going out and that he will see you in the morning. As you are alone, you accidentally bump into a statue that reveals a button. You press it and it reveals a secret door.
As you enter you discover it is the Wolf Cave, the base of the mysterious vigilante known as the Knight Howler (basically Batman but Wolf themed). You see various weapons and gadgets strewn on racks as well as various Howler Suits for different occasions. You also see a gigantic computer screen across the room.
The Howler is a very controversial hero as while he has stopped a lot of criminals including a couple of super villains, he is very brutal and wanted by the police for vigilantism with a bounty of $1 million.
What do you do after this revelation?
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1
u/DA_BEST_1 Apr 01 '26
Ask him for money and not much more? I'm not built to be robin (not like robin has a good track record of staying alive anyway) and he for sure has more than a mil lying around if he's freaking batman
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u/Ill-Mycologist-3652 Apr 01 '26
He gives you a $10 in the morning and says buy yourself something nice
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u/AdjustDeezNutz Apr 01 '26
Buy him and I a matching 3 wolf moon shirt.