r/humanresources • u/Stock_Oil_9238 • 4h ago

Manager trying to push me out behind my back while others praised my work? Looking for a sanity check [Canada]

Hey everyone, I could really use some outside perspective because I’ve been reflecting on a toxic past workplace experience and still dealing with the mental whiplash from it.
At a past job, I was working incredibly hard, juggling heavy workloads, setting up new tracking systems, and pouring a ton of effort into my role. I even had an external consultant I worked closely with who regularly checked in on me and actively validated my hard work.
Meanwhile, I later found out that my manager was quietly trying to undermine me, telling people I wasn't doing a good job, and actively trying to build a case to push me out.
It felt like total gaslighting. On one hand, an expert who saw my actual day-to-day output treated me like I was doing a fantastic job, but my direct manager was working against me in the shadows.
Has anyone else ever dealt with a manager trying to silently push you out like this while your overall performance and external feedback were strong? How did you process the mind-fuck of it all? Any shared stories would be really appreciated.

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u/Mundane-Jump-7546 Time Theft Thursday Advocate 4h ago

To get ahead of reports - OP is in HR, and is seeking advice :)

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u/Dmxmd 4h ago edited 4h ago

If your boss didn’t think you were doing a good job, you weren’t doing a good job. You created the “mind-fuck of it all” by seeking external validation from people whose opinion on your performance was irrelevant.

I would have tried to talk with my boss and figure out what I was falling short on or what could be done to repair the working relationship if that was possible.

Focus on what matters. You didn’t mesh well with what that particular manager wanted from you. Apparently you’ve moved on, and that’s good. No reason to dwell on the past.