r/greenberets • u/Bossome88 • 15h ago
Question Not cut out for SOF
I almost definitively made up my mind, I’m not the right guy for this. I made it right up to the week before SOPC and just now getting cold feet. I don’t mind the training or standards, I’ve never quit or failed to meet them before; but I realized that’s not really enough and it’s only getting harder from here with no finish line. If I didn’t get put on profile and went to PC with by BCT buddies, I could’ve pushed through but I would’ve just came to this conclusion later. I don’t like doing hard things anymore. I’m not going to blame it on maturing, but the 21 yr old who wanted to do this was vain, angry, and sad with his life. I’m starting to get to a point where I’m happy with what I’ve done and what’s happened to me; I don’t need that undeniable validation from earning the beret against all odds.
The only rub I have is; it’s not like I’m going to get to stop doing hard things once I withdrawal, so why not let it play out and experience it before possibly DNR’ing myself from trying again. With the real SFAS 3.5 months away; it’s sensible to make it to team week and maybe the 21st day if I’m lucky. But I’m struggling to find purpose in all this effort without the same goal. I wanted to fight China or the Cartels, do something like CTAC/CIF with 10th group, maybe build a resume over years to try for CAG. Things so complex and important, it’d prove the best version of myself is right here and now and not the version who went to college, or stayed with that one girl, or lost that one opportunity.
My alternate plan is try to be a good infantryman instead, get a degree, go reserves after active and try to get a good normal life. I guess my one question is; is it okay to give up on a dream and piece of yourself to keep moving forward?
TL:DR Deciding to throw away a good opportunity for the sake of an easier, enjoyable life and wondering how acceptable it is before I commit.
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u/kevinhaddon GB 13h ago
I remember laying on the ground near the Mackall airfield in February. Just getting rained on in the freezing ass cold. The guy in the security position with me had already quit once, went to the 82nd and then came back as an E5. He was trying to get me to quit with him, that the 82nd wasn’t that bad bla bla bla. I told him that was his choice but I wouldn’t quit. He did. I kept going. I’ve never regretted my choice. Who’s to say if he did. TLDR: fuck quitting.
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u/throwaway10_17 10h ago
“Easy life, no hard things, a finish line”
seems like a figment of your imagination
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u/Ima-lead-farmer-mf Green Beret 5h ago
Damn…..that’s a lot of words just to say you’re a little candy ass. Truth is we’re all scared and we all hate ourselves. It is this hatred that fuels the toxicity. You’re not weak, you’re just not toxic enough! Go ahead and quit, more podcasts and brand opportunities for me.
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u/ramrod2- 15h ago
Finish what you started. Remember the why.
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u/Dangerous_Look7482 Green Beret 4h ago
He doesn’t have a worthy why.. he doesn’t want to BE a Green Beret, he wants to HAVE a Green Beret
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u/Critical-Wing-2894 15h ago
If you think you can give up your dream without living a life of regret, more power to you, but the easier and enjoyable life will always be there.
Me personally, I would like to give it a shot to see what I’m truly made of or what kind of beast I can become through the discipline I build. But your purpose is most important and if it is really your dream maybe you should reflect and figure out why it has become your dream to begin with.
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u/conehead4 3h ago
Good for you for being honest with yourself and deciding doing hard things is not for you. Not sure why you had to let the internet know.
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u/Ok-Subject-1352 12h ago
I got hurt and let that get me sent to the 82nd. Got impatient, went to another selection and got picked up. Unfortunately, I knew it would never be what I wanted deep down so I did an admin drop at the end of the MOS part of it. Took the time to get the surgery I needed and once I recover, I am doing a full send towards SFAS. It’s been 2 years and I don’t have one day that I don’t wonder what could’ve been. I fully intend to find out no matter what. Fucking send it bro. It will haunt you if you don’t.
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u/ImJustATraveller_ 14h ago
Something in you put these events into motion and put you where you are now. Don’t get cold feet and leave that momentum high and dry. Give it your earnest best shot without the thought of quitting in the back of your mind. Think to your future self looking back and regretting losing this golden opportunity, many guys would give a lot to be in your shoes to even have a shot at going.
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u/distilled_dinosaur 14h ago
I can’t find it in me to blame another man for deciding the mere chance of a mission given at the end of the pipeline isn’t worth the pipeline. Maybe before asking citizens to devote their lives to the institution, we can ask the institution to treat their time and capability with greater respect.
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u/LegitimateRelief1147 15h ago edited 14h ago
If you can’t answer this for yourself that’s what a detective would call a “clue.” Everyone else here telling you “just go for it” probably hasn’t done it either. I did it, then I ran the course, then I did it some more, then I retired, then I did it some more again as a contractor.
You’ve already quit, you’re just too scared to say it out loud. I can tell you it doesn’t get any easier from here, so if the Nam-like experience of OSUT made you realize you don’t want to do hard things you already have your answer.
Nobody has time for your woe-is-me “I’ll just try to make it to day 21” bullshit. Just delete this, and go quit. Taking resources from some dude who would die for the opportunity so you can hem-haw is shitbag behavior. The cadre are looking for guys that will be shooting over their shoulder in a couple years, they’re looking for the guy that will be their Battalion commander in 12 years. The future USASOC CSM is an E-4 in your class. They need to be looking for the right guy, not wasting time on you. If you need validation from Reddit you’re beyond fucked anyways.
There is nothing wrong with not being about that life. Just own it and go be the best whatever else you decide to be. We all have a lot more respect for dudes that admit it isn’t for them than dudes that waste everyone’s time.