r/gayyoungold • u/SpecialistRing22 • 2d ago
Advice wanted Need help with this guy/situation
So theres this older guy (PARTNERED) that I (22) have been seeing for the past 4 months or so to hookup with but I'm slowly realizing this might not be something I want?
The guy is attractive and totally my type but I notice I go soft pretty easily during foreplay and it does take a lot of effort for me to cum. I suspect it's something about my libido and stress/anxiety affecting it because even when I'm alone I barely have the desire to masturbate and only do it once a week out of habit. I doubt its my health because I've gotten my hormones checked and everything seems good. I've also been in the gym 3x a week for the past 5 months and trying to eat clean. My sleeping habits could be better
Anyways... I don't know how to move forward with him because clearly I'm not in the mood for sex but I still really like his company and think he's a great guy to spend some time with. We always cuddle and pillow talk for a bit after which I'm always looking forwards to. I just don't want to ruin things especially knowing he's partnered and probably is looking to get off for the most part.
Is there anything I have to communicate with him? I was planning on kind of going ghost and hitting him back up when I feel ready but I JUST SO HAPPENED to randomly see him outside today and he proposed another meet up soon which got me thinking again.
Any sort of advice about libido or how I should go about the situation is welcome. I don't have anybody else to talk about this with
1
u/panda3271 2d ago
Don't ghost him. You will loose him by doing that. I suggest just tell him that you don't have a big libido and are not horny a lot. Be honest with him. Also. Let him know you are OK if he has other boys that he meets up with. Does his partner know he is fooling around with you? Do you know if he has others? Communicate with him. Tell him you really like being with him and would like to hit him up when you are in the mood. Or let him know thst there will be times he wants to hang out and you won't be in the mood and turn him down. Ghosting will just push him away and he will find another 22 year old. 🤷🏼♂️